Jeremy Clarkson

The World According to Clarkson

Clarkson trades in his fast cars and city living and takes on the life of a gentleman farmer at Diddly Squat farm, in a brand new, hilarious collection of stories and observations. Praise for Clarkson: 'Brilliant . . . laugh-out-loud' Daily Telegraph 'Outrageously funny . . . will have you in stitches' Time Out 'Very funny . . . I cracked up laughing on the tube' Evening Standard

Diddly Squat

Diddly Squat 2

In I Know You Got Soul, Jeremy Clarkson writes about the machines that he believes have 'soul'. It will come as no surprise to anyone that Jeremy Clarkson loves machines. But it's not just any old bucket of blots, cogs and bearings that rings his bell. In fact, he's scoured the length and breadth of the land, plunged into the oceans and taken to the skies in search of machines with that elusive certain something. And along the way he's discovered: âe¢ The safest place to be in the event of nuclear war âe¢ Who would win if Superman, James Bond and The Terminator had a fight âe¢ The stupidest person he's ever met âe¢ What an old Cornish institution called Arthur has to do with 0898 chat lines âe¢ And how jean-Claude Van Damme might get eaten by a lion In I Know You Got Soul: Machines with a Certain Something, Jeremy Clarkson tells stories of the geniuses, innovators and crackpots who put the ghost in the machine. From Brunel's SS Great Britain to the awesome Blackbird spy-plane and from the woeful - but inspiring - Graf Zeppelin to Han Solo's Millennium Falcon, they can't help but love them in return. Praise for Jeremy Clarkson: 'Brilliant . . . laugh-out-loud' Daily Telegraph 'Outrageously funny . . . will have you in stitches' Time Out Number-one bestseller Jeremy Clarkson writes on cars, current affairs and anything else that annoys him in his sharp and funny collections. Born To Be Riled, Clarkson On Cars, Don't Stop Me Now, Driven To Distraction, Round the Bend and Motorworld are also available as Penguin paperbacks; the Penguin App iClarkson: The Book of Cars can be downloaded on the App Store. Jeremy Clarkson because his writing career on the Rotherham Advertiser. Since then he has written for the Sun and the Sunday Times. Today he is the tallest person working in British television, and is the presenter of the hugely popular Top Gear.

I Know You Got Soul

This collection contains a selection of Jeremy Clarkson's journalism to date, from his Top Gear and Sunday Times articles. They transcend the framework of motoring to offer acute observations about people, places and the way we live. This ed. originally published: London: BBC, 2000.

Born to be Riled

Everyone knows that Jeremy Clarkson finds the world a perplexing place � after all, he wrote a bestselling book about it. Yet despite the appearance of The World According To Clarkson, things don�t seem to have improved much. However, Jeremy is not someone to give up easily and he�s decided to have another go. In And Another Thing, our exasperated hero discovers that: � He inadvertently dropped a bomb on North Carolina � We�re all going to explode at the age of 62Russians look bad in Speedos. But not as bad as we do. � No one should have to worry about being Bill Oddie�s long lost sisterHe should probably be nicer about David Beckham Thigh-slappingly funny and � as ever � in your face, Jeremy Clarkson bursts the pointless little bubbles of the idiots while celebrating the special, the unique and the sheer bloody brilliant �

And Another Thing

The publication of The World According to Clarkson in 2004 launched a multi-million-copy bestselling phenomenon. But to no avail. Jeremy's one-man war on crimes against common sense has not yet been won. And our hero's still scratching his head at the madness of it all. But it's not all bad. He's learned a little along the way, including: why binge drinking is good for you; the worst word in the English language; the remarkable secret of eternal youth; the pleasure and pain of middle-aged drumming; the problem with America; and, how to dispose of a seal. For anyone who's ever been driven to wonder just what is the matter with people these days, For Crying Out Loud! is the perfect riposte. Surprising, fearless and always laugh-out-loud funny, Clarkson's back. And he's got a point.

the world according to Clarkson, volume three

For crying out loud!

JEREMY CLARKSON'S LATEST - AND MOST OUTRAGEOUS - TAKE ON THE WORLD CLARKSON'S BACK - AND THIS TIME HE'S PUTTING HIS FOOT DOWN From his first job as a travelling sales rep selling Paddington Bears to his latest wheeze as a gentleman farmer, Jeremy Clarkson's love of cars has just about kept him out of trouble. But in a persistently infuriating world, sometimes you have to race full-throttle at the speed-bumps. Because there's still plenty to get cross about, including: · Why nothing good ever came out of a meeting · Muesli's unmentionable side effects · Navigating London when every single road is being dug up at once · People who read online reviews of dishwashers · ****ing driverless cars Buckle up for a bumpy ride - you're holding the only book in history to require seatbelts . . . Praise for Jeremy Clarkson: Brilliant . . . Laugh-out-loud' Daily Telegraph 'Outrageously funny . . . Will have you in stitches' Time Out 'Very funny . . . I cracked up laughing on the tube' Evening Standard

Really?

We know all about the world according to Clarkson. In a series of record-breaking bestsellers Jeremy has revealed it to be a puzzling, frustrating place where all too often the lunatics seem to be running the asylum. But in The Top Gear Years, we get something rather different. Top Gearwas once just a television programme about what was probably still known as 'motoring'. Top Gearmagazine arrived in 1993. And that went well. Then, ten years ago, at a former RAF aerodrome in Surrey, Jeremy and his friends built a wold that was rather more to his liking- it was called Top Gear HQ. And Top Gear HQ turned out to be to Jeremy what the jungle was to Tarzan- the perfect place to work and play. But they didn't stop there. With their little corner of the commuter-belt properly sorted out, Jeremy and the boys had a crack at the rest of the world. Soon Top Gear Livewas charging around the globe with the subtlety of a mid-seventies rock tour and far-flung outposts were established from North America to China. Five hundred million viewers later, there was an empire of petrol-headed mayhem upon which the sun never set. And all along Jeremy was writing about it, Here are the fruits of his labours- the cars, the high jinks, the pleasure and the pain. Brilliantly written and laugh-out-loud funny, The Top Gear Yearsis Clarkson at his pithy, provocative, hilarious best.

The Top Gear Years

Collected writing from the best and funniest motoring journalist in the country

Clarkson on Cars

Clarkson is back with a brand new book of hilarious stories and observations about our gone-wrong world. ___________ In November 2016 we woke up to the news that the forthright presenter of a popular television programme had become the most powerful man on the planet. His name, sadly, was not Jeremy Clarkson, but we might not have been any more surprised if it had been. Because the world seems to have taken a decidedly odd turn since Jeremy last reflected on the state of things between the covers of a book. But who better than JC to help us navigate our way through the mess? And while he's being trying to make sense of it all he's discovered one or two things along the way, including - The disabling effects of being vegan - How Blackpool might be improved by drilling a hole through it - The problem with meditation - A perfect location for rebuilding Palmyra - Why Tom Cruise can worship lizards if he wants to It's all been a bit unsettling. But don't worry. If You'd Just Let Me Finish is Clarkson at his best. He may be as bemused, exasperated, amused and surprised as the rest of us, but in a world gone crazy, thank God someone has still got his head screwed on ... Praise for Clarkson: 'Brilliant...laugh-out-loud' - Daily Telegraph 'Outrageously funny...will have you in stiches' - Time Out 'Very funny...I cracked up laughing on the tube' - Evening Standard

If You’d Just Let Me Finish

There's more to life than cars. Jeremy Clarkson knows this. There is, after all a whole world out there just waiting to be discovered. So, before, he gets on to torque steer and active suspension, he takes time to consider: the madness of Galapagos tortoises; the similarities between Jeremy Paxman and AC/DC's bass guitarist; the problems and perils of being English; God's dumbest creation. Then there are the the cars: whether it's the poxiest little runabout or an exotic, firebreathing supercar, no one does cars like Clarkson. Unmoved by mechanics' claims and unimpressed by press junkets, he approaches anything on four wheels without fear or favour. What emerges from the ashes is rarely pretty. But always very, very funny.

Don't Stop Me Now

Jeremy Clarkson gets under the skin of 12 countries by looking at the cars people drive and how they drive them. Hilarious travel writing.

Motorworld

If You'd Just Let Me Finish

What Could Possibly Go Wrong... is the eighth book in Jeremy Clarkson's bestselling Clarkson on Cars series. There's nothing quite like messing about on four wheels. In fact, there's no better way to contemplate the madness of the world than from the driver's seat of something which is zooming by very fast indeed. Or so Jeremy Clarkson believes. For he's been pondering some really rather important matters, such as why: - God has a streak of German perfectionism - Crab spread beats Heston Blumenthal's rhubarb mousse - Monaco's billionaires are ruining the Grand Prix - The back of a dog tastes nicer than marzipan Someone's got to. And while a full tank and the open road might not quite reveal the meaning of life, there's certainly some fun to be had along the way . . . 'Brilliant . . . laugh-out-loud' Daily Telegraph 'Very funny . . . I cracked up laughing on the tube' Evening Standard 'Outrageously funny . . . will have you in stitches' Time Out

What Could Possibly Go Wrong...

Driven to distraction

Jeremy Clarkson's Motorworld

Brace yourself, Clarkson's back. And he'd like to tell you what he thinks about some of the most awe-inspiring, earth-shatteringly fast and jaw-droppingly gorgeous cars in the world (alongside a few irredeemable disasters ...... ). Or he would, if there weren't so many things competing for his attention first. So much to get off his chest. The world according to Clarkson is a perplexing place, filled with thorny subjects like: The prospect of having Terry Wogan as president Why you'll never see a woman driving a Lexus The unforeseen consequences of inadequate birth control Why everyone should spend a weekend with a digger Fearless, independent, surprising and laugh-out-loud funny, Driven to Distraction is full-throttle Clarkson at his best; a unique look at the joys, absurdities and frustrations of modern life. With wheels. Buckle up, get comfortable, and hold on tight. There's no one who writes about cars like Jeremy . . .

Driven to Distraction

Nikt nie potrafi pisać o samochodach lepiej niż Jeremy Clarkson. Podczas gdy większość jego kolegów z branży koncentruje się na osiągach i spalaniu, Jeremy skupia się na ważniejszych kwestiach. W swojej najnowszej książce Clarkson między innymi: – wyjaśnia, dlaczego Dania to najlepsze miejsce na świecie; – uzasadnia, co skłania go do podboju Francji; – dokonuje psychoanalizy włoskiego kierowcy; – dokładnie opisuje australijską faunę i florę; – ujawnia związek zaślepek w samochodzie ze statusem społecznym jego właściciela; – daje wyraz swojej niechęci do częstowania gości ginem z tonikiem; – opowiada o swoich perypetiach z ekspresem do kawy. Uzbrojony w genialne poczucie humoru, ostre pióro i parę porządnych dżinsów, nie bacząc na przepisy BHP i nie troszcząc się o normy poprawności politycznej, Jeremy brawurowo przemierza świat w poszukiwaniu odpowiedzi na zagwozdki i problemy codzienności. A nam pozostaje tylko zadać pytanie: Co może pójść nie tak?

Jeremy Clarkson

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