Kate Hall

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"The perfect book for parents who want -- NEED -- to laugh, but don't have time to sit down and read a daunting book. Grab it, head to the bathroom and lock the door until they find you!" - Jill Smokler, author of"Confessions of a Scary Mommy" "The Big Book of Parenting Tweets dishes up bite-size nuggets of funny. Impossible to read just one." - Jen Mann, author of"People I Want to Punch in the Throat: Competitive Crafters, Drop-Off Despots, and Other Suburban Scourges" This book is HILARIOUS. Being a parent is a frustrating, hilarious, weird, wild experience. This book captures some of the best of our snark. You need it. You do. - Nikki Knepper, author of"Moms Who Drink and Swear" A terrific read, featuring some of the funniest (and most honest) parents in the Twitterverse... my go-to gift for new parents! - Johanna Stein, author of "How Not To Calm A Child On A Plane and Other Parenting Advice from a Questionable Source" Twitter isn't just for breaking news and celebrity stalking-it's also a goldmine of the funniest comedy online. Jokes? People tell jokes on Twitter? YES, they do. And they are hilarious ... but who wants to sift through the hashtags, RTs and FFs to get to the good stuff? WE GET IT! Parents don't have time for all that. That's why the duo behind the illustrated humor blog Science of Parenthood teamed up with Twitter maven Kate Hall of Hall of Tweets to create The Big Book of Parenting Tweets -a laugh-riot collection of more than three-hundred tweetable moments straight from the parenting trenches from the most hysterical comedians on Twitter, who just happen to be parents. Here is just a peek at some of what you'll find inside: My 4yo is trying to sell my own M&M's back to me. This guy's going places.- @FatherWithTwins With my wife away, my children keep asking me for things like meals and bandaids and sympathy, but I don't know where we keep any of that.- @KalvinMacleod She took 4 y/o to the park & texted "Can I get her ice-cream?" Get her a Heineken for all I care. Free babysitters get to call the shots.- @BunmiLaditan I wish bottles of ibuprofen came with a little prize inside, like maybe a babysitter.- @SuburbanSnaps To anyone out there thinking about having kids, today my 2yo threw a temper tantrum because she couldn't get rid of her shadow. - @XplodingUnicorn Peppered with cartoons by Science of Parenthood, The Big Book of Parenting Tweets is the perfect gift for every over-worked, under-showered, sleep-deprived parent who could use a quick laugh, because who has time for more?

Featuring the Most Hilarious Parents on Twitter

The Big Book of Parenting Tweets

My first published novel took me five YEARS to write. The second took months. Now? I draft each of my novels in about a week. We live in a fast-paced world, and not everyone has the time to spend months or even years working on a novel. This book is a comprehensive guide over how I get a book from concept to fully-edited in the course of about a week. (It can take less or more depending on the length of the novel or my time constraints). This process can work for any genre of fiction, as I have used it for every novel I've written after the first. *** Kate Hall is a bestselling author who is known for her quick success and high earnings in the Paranormal Romance genre. In this guide, she shows how you, too, can write books fast to potentially increase your publishing income.

How I Outline and Draft a Full Novel in Just A Week

A Book A Week

Kathy Parker

New public library directors quickly learn what seasoned directors already know: running a library means you’ve always got your hands full—balancing the needs of staff, patrons, facilities, library boards, and other stakeholders with professional responsibilities like community interactions, legal and financial requirements, and whole lot else that wasn’t exactly in the job description. Whether you are considering becoming a public library director, are brand new to the role, or have settled in but find yourself thinking “there’s got to be a better way,” authors Hall and Parker are here to help. This book walks you through the core components of getting up to speed and then provides templates, sample documents, checklists, and other resources that will make your job easier. Gleaned from their own decades of experience in library leadership positions, in this toolkit they - cover such key topics as employees, trustees, finances, legal issues, library policies, emergency planning, and technology; - discuss strategic planning and share advice on keeping up with trends; - offer nearly two dozen ready-to-use resources, including a Director’s Report Template, a Social Media Policy, an Employee Exit Questionnaire, a Library Cleaning Checklist, a Vision Statement worksheet, and more; and - suggest additional learning opportunities in each chapter to help you continue your learning journey. Public library directors can steer clear of common pain points by relying on the expert guidance and organizational aids in this toolkit.

The Public Library Director’s Toolkit

Darkness and Flame

Ian Tregillis

Gini Koch

James Enge

Esther Friesner

Patrick Hurley

Steven Harper

Jacey Bedford

Jaime Lee Moyer

Andrija Popovic

Violette Malan

F. Brett Cox

John Linwood Grant

Juliet Kemp

Jason Palmatier

PORTALS: What mysteries...or horrors...await you on the other side? The lure of an open doorway is hard to resist. What lies beyond? Where will it take you—and how will you be transformed? Will it lead to paradise...or a living hell? You’ll never know, unless you have the courage to take that first step. In this anthology you will find sixteen stories of portals to exotic destinations, whether it’s a doorway in the desert that appears out of thin air, a fairy ring of mushrooms in the backyard, a crack in the road, or a train headed straight to Hell. Science fiction and fantasy authors Nancy Holzner, Esther Friesner, Ian Tregillis, Jacey Bedford, John Linwood Grant, Kate Hall, Gini Koch, Violette Malan, Juliet Kemp, James Enge, Steven Harper, F. Brett Cox, Jaime Lee Moyer, Jason Palmatier, Andrija Popovic, and Patrick Hurley invite you to step through a host of doorways to other realities with infinite possibilities, some horrible, some comic, and some just plain weird. So take my hand—not too tight!—and let’s journey into another world. The door is open. The portal awaits.

Portals

Sarah's life has never felt more out of control. After her parents die in a car accident, she's been sent to live with estranged relatives she barely knows and thrust into a private school for the magically talented and super rich - of which she is neither. When Sarah finds an orphaned dragon's egg in the forest, she thinks things couldn't possibly get more complicated...that is, until she starts falling for Alex, the handsome trans pyromancer from her potions class. Juggling magic lessons, a baby dragon and a blossoming romance keeps Sarah too busy to worry about her past. But when a series of gruesome magical murders starts happening on campus, Sarah suddenly finds herself keeping more secrets than she bargained for. When she starts to see Helen, the aunt who disappeared the night of her parents' death, she begins to suspect that she's the witch responsible for the deaths plaguing the school. Sarah must find the courage to face her past and uncover the truth about Helen and her parents, even if this means ruining her relationship with everyone she has come to love since moving to the city. Because if Sarah can't catch the murderer, she and her friends just might become the next victims.

Smoke and Mist

Descartes asked, How can I know that I am not now dreaming? The Certainty Dream poses similar questions through poetry, but without the trappings of traditional philosophy. Kate Hall’s bracingly immediate, insistently idiosyncratic debut collection lays bare the tricks and tools of her trade: a mynah bird perches in poems but 'stands for nightingale'; the poet’s antelope turns transparent; she dresses up her orange trees with bark and leaves. As the dream world and the waking world blur, the body and the dimensions it inhabits become a series of overlapping circles, all acting as containers for both knowledge and uncertainty. At times disarmingly plainspoken, at others, singing with lyric possibility, these poems make huge associative leaps. Taken together, they present the argument that to truly 'know' something, one must first recognize its traces in something else.

The Certainty Dream

Kate Hall

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