Pamela Taeuffer

What if you were afraid to even turn the doorknob to your front door when coming home because of what might wait inside for you? What would it take to make you step out of your shadows, and once and for all break free from the twisted security of familiarity, and take a chance with another that just might change everything? What if you could ask for what you want without being afraid? Could you trust another person that much? Could you trust yourself to ask it and be willing to hear the things you fear? And what if you could truly begin to conquer those deep fears that hide inside you, allowing your heart to open, become vulnerable, and have the chance for real intimacy-the kind that allows another to come closer than you've ever let anyone before? My name is Nicky Young, and this is my family saga and my love story of the battle of family alcoholism, addiction and abuse. This is my journey and coming of age storty of how I learned to let another person come so close that he could see the very depths of me-all of the good and bad that simmered in my soul. You may say, "I don't believe a woman so innocent, could fantasize about sex." I did. You may think, "No one talks like this." Perhaps we should have conversations just like these. When I was seventeen, a man named Ryan Tilton, a twenty-- year old professional baseball player, came into my life. I knew it was time. I had to take a risk-that a promise to hold me, accept me for who I was, to never abandon me-were real. These are my experiences, my fantasies, my conversations and the slow, intimate reveal of how I -normally learned to open my heart to another. and how I learned to trust myself so that I could really, really, be alive. "I'm very excited about this- book in the Broken Bottles Series by Pamela Taeuffer. As a family therapist for more than thirty years, it is my opinion these books are like no other. They offer you an inspiring adventure as well as a thoughtful journey towards trust and intimacy. Truly a stimulating and thought-provoking read." -Louise Monahan, M.S., MFT "

Shadow Heart: A Coming of Age Novel about Learning to Love, Trust, and Embracing the Burning Desires of Intimacy

There are times in our lives when we encounter love so profound, so powerful that the life you've always planned for gets interrupted by the love you've desperately longed for.Such is the case for 18-year-old Nicky Young. High school is officially over, and she has been planning on attending Stanford, but he very hot and very desirable Goliath baseball star Ryan Tilton has other ideas.As their relationship begins to heat up, Ryan wants her to commit to him. Nicky is wanting him too, but suspicious of his intentions. Especially when ex-lovers keep showing up! How can she commit herself to Ryan when she is so close to the independence she has longed for ever since she was a young girl.As they become more and more intimate, childhood memories of being abused by her father and her sister's rape at age 14, feelings of deep shame come pouring through Nicky's mind. She desperately wants to open her heart but cannot live through the pain of being abandoned again.What lengths will she go to stay strong when what she really craves at the deepest levels of her being is standing right in front of her?

A Coming of Age Novel about Risking Your Heart and Embracing the Fire of Love

Fire Heart

Love has found me and I can't shake my fears of abandonment. I great up in family alcoholism, leaving me insecure of almost every physical attribute. I can't wait to leave my family's home and soak in Stanford's halls. It's what I've wanted all my life. Now . . . love challenges me - can I have both without running?

Pamela Taeuffer

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