Name: Shadow Chaser
ISBN: 9780765324047

Alexey Pehov

Facing formidable magical monsters who have defeated countless armies and wizards, a grief-stricken Harold and his surviving companions endeavor to gain a magic horn to save their land from The Nameless One. By the award-winning author of Shadow Prowler. 30,000 first printing.

Book Two of The Chronicles of Siala

Shadow Chaser

Shadow Harold, master thief, is in over his head. When he accepted the King's commission (not that he had any choice in the matter) he did not think that it would be to retrieve a legendary artefact from Hrad Spein, the many-layered resting place of ogres, elves and wizards; a place of dread, awe and immeasurable power, sealed up for centuries. Unless Harold finds the long-lost Horn, the Nameless One will overrun the realm of Valiostr, the northernmost kingdom of Siala. But that was just the beginning of Harold's troubles. Magically bound to the Key with which the dark elves sealed Hrad Spein, and which his enemies are determined to obtain at any cost, treachery, subterfuge and death follow Harold and his companions as they fight to reach their goal. On one side is the threat of the Nameless One; on the other, the servants of the mysterious Master. A long-dead mage is living in Harold's head, and his dreams are haunted by terrible visions. What is the meaning of the House of Power, not to mention the House of Pain, the House of Love, and the House of Fear? Resolutely denying his destiny as the mystical Dancer in the Shadows, Harold's journey takes him to the Forest of Zagraba, 'the land where the gods had walked at the dawn of time'…

Sarah Escorsa

Original rating: 4 miserable little stars.
New rating: 4.5 stars. Go me and stuff.

➽ And the moral of this reread is: I was probably as Super Extra High™ on magic mushrooms as the shamans in this series when I first read this book. I mean, it’s been only three ridiculous weeks but I’d already forgotten most of the story pre-reread (yeah yeah yeah, shame on me and stuff). Not only that, it seems I failed to mention Invincible (the mostest awesomest shaggy-haired, serrated claws and fangs-clad pet rat ever) in my review. And disproportionate, ever-twittering midget zombies, too. And crayfish-tight grips! Crayfish!!! I forgot to tell you about my murderous babies’ cousins twice removed!!! Can you believe this?! Now if that isn’t the ultimate proof I need to lay off the magic fungi for a while, I don’t know what is.





[Original review]

😈 Blame It All On The Evil Russians™ Again Buddy Read (BIAOTEVABR™) with Evgeny and Eilonwy 😈


  “A green goblin with blue eyes; three dark elves; a dour knight; nine warriors, one of whom appeared to be an angry gnome; and a dwarf in an absurd bowler hat. Plus a skinny rogue. Not the kind of company you meet in the city every day of the week.”
 Talk for yourself, inexperienced puny human. You see delightfully colorful cliques like this one everyday in my neck of the nefarious woods.


  Warning
: a deadly pre-review digression rivetingly riveting introduction is about to be mercilessly unleashed upon you. But. I am feeling uncharacteristically friendly and kind-hearted today, so I put it in spoiler tags. Because, as deadly rivetingly riveting as it might be, I am aware that some of you like the crap to be cut dramatically. You are most welcome and stuff.

(view spoiler)[Okay, let’s be disgustingly honest here: I hardly remember anything about this book even though I read it less than 10 days ago. So right now you’re probably thinking that this momentary amnesia has two probably probable causes:

① The book is Somewhat Very Bad (SVB™). Which doesn’t make much sense, you’ll have to agree, since I rated it 4 stars, but you Clueless Barnacles and your reverse logic will never fail to leave me ever so slightly dumbfounded and most puzzled and stuff, so a 4 star rating in Nefarious Crustacean Territory might equate a -10 star rating in Clueless Barnacle Zone, who the bloody shrimp knows?

And/or

 ② I am suffering from severe memory loss because of old age.



I said OLD AGE, you Disrespectful Arthropods! I never said anything about the excessive consumption of slightly fermented beverages! I’ll have you know I NEVER drink alcoholic, um, refreshments. Never ever ever ever. Especially not 10 year old Laphroaig. Nope nope nope and yuck yuck yuck. Anyway, I am very sorry to inform you that neither of your hypotheses are right. Ha. You see, my Problematic Decapods, the reason why I don’t remember much about this book is that, um, you know, I, err, I, um, you know, err…Funny, I can’t remember what I was about to say. I’m pretty sure it was fascinating, though. And deep. Really deep. Oh, well. (hide spoiler)]

So. This book is about my thieving boyfriend Harold-who-is-called-Garrett-in-the-original-Russian-but-why-the-fish-keep-his-original-name-when-Harold-sounds-super-sexy-and-oh-so-much-cooler-than-Garrett-eyeroll (view spoiler)[
  
 (hide spoiler)] and his quest to save the world from a doomed doom at the hands of The Bad Evil Guy Without A Name. (Hey, no blaming my ever failing memory this time, the bad, evil guy really is actually called the Nameless One and stuff.) 

My Harold is still as yummy as ever here, although I must admit he isn’t quite as deliciously snarky and full of smartassitude as he was in book 1. Which might or might not explain why he went down a few notches on the Potential Harem Material Thermometer (PHMT™). But hey, he has a valid excuse. I mean, as darkly scrumptious yet funny as fish light and fluffy things were in book 1, it all got gloomy pretty fast in this instalment. Like, the characters who are killed dead really stay really killed dead and stuff. The author disposes of a character you slightly somewhat like (a little), but you keep thinking to your little self, “Pehov is a nice chap, he wouldn’t exterminate so and so and so and so, and so and so, and so and so, would he? Of course not, that would be too cruel. Also, it wouldn’t be very hilarious.” But guess what? He bloody shrimping does. 



My thoughts exactly, dear boy. Although, I have to say that your telenovela-like family drama is nothing compared to what Pehov put my poor, sensitive little self through here.

You know what makes this worse? That Pehov, in his All-Machiavellian Evil Russianness (AMER™) starts the book with funny-as-fish shenanigans involving a sullen, angry, cantankerous dwarf’s toothache (don’t ask). And once he’s gotten you all gleeful and joyful and stuff…bam! He gets grim and ruthless and bloody-stinking-fish-this-ain’t-not-so-rollickingly-droll-anymore on you. The epitome of Evil Russianness, if you ask me. I could swear I heard Pehov muhahahaha-ing like a maniac in the background while I was reading the book, too. 



Hey, nice haircut, Alexey! You’ll have to give me your hairdressers’ address!

Anyway, things escalate quickly and dark stuff scrumptiously happens. My boyfriend pulls off a Super Extra Cool Heist (SECH™). There are delightful battles, gutted bodies, spilled entrails and severed limbs (view spoiler)[
  yay!
 (hide spoiler)]. Yet another Wondrous Pehov Bar Fight (WPBF™) is had. (Still can’t decide which is most wondrous, this one or the one in the previous instalment. They are both most stupendilicious, if you ask me.) There are extremely appetizing treacherous bastards. Adventurous undertakings are undertaken. There is Walking Prophecy stuff and mysterious-as-fish stuff I might perhaps maybe want to know more about. Possibly. Kli-Kli is still the mostest awesomest goblin jester ever. (I also happen to think he is the best dance teacher ever, but I’m not sure everyone agrees with me on that one.) There is a supercalifragilisticexpiashrimpocious carrying spell that is clearly the best thing since skewered barnacles sliced bread. Also, Miralissa the fanged elfess = YUM. 

Okay, so this book is much slower paced than the first one. It is partially infected with the shudder-inducing (and usually deadly) Filling Filler Virus (FFV™), and you pretty much have to get to the 50% mark for exciting stuff to get well, um, you know, exciting and stuff. The translation is much, much, MUCH better than that of book 1, but the editing is downright catastrophic (missing letters, missing words, extra spaces, missing spaces, misspellings, typos…the works). Also, the book suffers from a desperate lack of ever-bleating goat-men. (Oops, sorry, I meant to say “Doralissians.”) BUT. Apart from that, it’s all Slightly Very Good (SVG™), so I rest in my case and stuff. 

➽ And the moral of this Hey, Looks Like Alzheimer’s Is Not Yet Me After All Crappy Non Review (HLLAINYMAACNR™) is: Evgeny says the next book is the darkest in this trilogy. And now I wonder: will ANY of the characters survive the next instalment? With all their limbs intact? And no toothache? If the author keeps this up, I’m pretty sure they won’t. So. Let’s finish this with a very private message to Evil Mr Pehov: kill my boyfriend, Kli-Kli, Miralissa or any of the lucky few who miraculously managed to make it through this book and I’m unleashing the murderous crustaceans on you. But hey, no pressure and stuff.

· Book 1: Shadow Prowler ★★★★
· Book 3: Shadow Blizzard ★★★★



Actual rating: 3.545785 stars. And a half.

Better translation than book 1 - slower pace - worse editing + creepy stuff - second book syndrome + my boyfriend Garrett Harold + a pretty cool heist + severed limbs + yet another scrumpalicious bar fight + Kli-Kli the coolest court jester green bed bug ever + battles and duels to the death and stuff + villainous villains + plenty of adventure stuff =



Yes, Darwin is indeed a huge Siala fan. And a huge Pehov fan, too. I mean, he's got all the guy's books on his pre-20th century Kindle and stuff. I kid you not. 

➽ Full review to come.

Shadow Chaser Book Two of The Chronicles of Siala

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