Ann Charles

Meanwhile, Back in Deadwood … the mystery and mayhem continue. Between the butchered body parts, creepy killers, dogged detectives, ghoulish ghosts, and ever-present TV cameras, Violet Parker’s purple boots are itching to skedaddle. But there is no escaping another murder investigation or her new deadly reputation. Not even if both risk the lives of those she loves most.

Meanwhile, Back in Deadwood

Sarah Escorsa

☢ Friendly warning: this crappy non-review is proof that having no day off for three months is hazardous to a girl's already decaying mental state. Read at your own risk. 

♦ Yeah, I know, you've never heard of this series.

♦ Yeah, I know, you have no freaking idea who Violet Parker is.

♦ Yeah, I know, you're judging this book by its ugly cover and wondering why the hell would anyone choose to read it.

Yeah yeah yeah, I know all that. What do you want me to say? Is it my fault there is no hope for you? Sigh.



►►Welcome to Deadwood, the only non-stupid paranormal mystery series I was ever given to read. To think I didn't even like the first instalment. I must have been young and stupid at the time. Well I was certainly young and stupid enough to continue with the series after giving that first book a 2-star rating. That would never happen now that I'm old, wise and highly intelligent. Oh no. I would go all (check all that apply) Rylee Adamson/Cal Leandros/Mind Sweeper/Colbana Files and send the series to Kindle Oblivion (yes, there is such a place. It is very dark, creepy and pretty stuffy, too. And generally very very scary ← feel free to shudder at this point). Actually, I could give you quite a few more examples of series that suffered this horrible fate but we don't have all day so I'll try and move on. Try being the key word here. Obviously. Anyway, had I been old, wise and highly intelligent when I read book 1 I would have given up on this series. Good thing I was young and stupid back then, huh? Ha. 

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know I'm not making much sense. Please don't tell me that surprises you. You weren't actually expecting anything less were you? Not with the two fried grey cells that are currently residing in my little head? Didn't think so. Good. Moving on. Or trying to. Again.

►► So, where were we? Oh yes, welcome to Deadwood!  Deadwood is a pretty cool place:

♦ A place where paranormal mysteries are no boring, silly Chick Lit-type fests. 

♦ A place where the female lead has many flaws but is no TSTL heroine.

♦ A place where the local population is as weird/hilarious/crazy/assholish as it gets. 

♦ A place where spare body parts, ghosts, ghouls and weird creatures abound.
 
♦ A place where there is romance but it isn't your usual STOOPID lovey-dovey nonsense ← I didn't even fall into one of my infamous sugar-shock induced comas while reading this book. Now that should tell you something.



►► What I like most about this series? The characters. 

♦ I love them all, starting with Violet. Which is pretty strange when you think about it. Because she is certainly no Kate Daniels. Or Muse. Or Shanti. Or Amra. Or Elise Kavanagh. Or Kate Prospero. Or #1001 ← should I go on or did you get it? You did? Good. Looks like I'm not the only highly intelligent human being around here. Anyway, Violet. A single mother of pain-in-the-ass-almost-teenage twins with tons of insecurities. Pretty much your average thirty-something girl. Not very exciting right? The thing about Violet is that she's got a wicked sense of humour. And some weird powers. And that she might be genetically destined to be some kind of executioner, too. Hmm, she might not be your average thirty-something girl after all. She might actually be pretty exciting after all ← were you seriously expecting me to get excited about a non-exciting female lead? Did I already say there was no hope for you? I did, didn't I? Oh well. 

♦ Who else? The whole cast of secondary characters: Doc Nyce aka Violet's boyfriend (who seems to be getting Nycer and Yummier with every new instalment. If he keeps it up he's destined to go poof only to magically appear in my harem), Old man Harvey aka the Hilarious Perv, his nephew Coop the Cop aka the resident aggravating pain in the butt, Nutcase Osh aka the Abe Lincoln lookalike... Hey, the characters in this series are so cool I even like the asshole in residence! ←oh will you please stop snickering for a minute?! I know this is no surprise to you because YES, I *always* like the asshole residence. There. I said it. Happy now? Sigh. I swear you people are going to be the death of me.
	


Hey, hold on for a minute! I thought this was just going to be one my standard crappy summer reviews but it looks like you're getting a never-ending crappy summer review instead! Lucky you! Aren't you glad you decided to read this?! *whispers* Psst, want me to let you in on a secret? There's no one holding you at gunpoint right now, you don't actually have to finish reading this non-review if you don't feel like it

Now, now, don't be scared. I'm almost done. Not quite. But almost. 

►► Here, let me make this quick and painless for you (because I'm kind, thoughtful and compassionate like that. Of course I am. Why would you think otherwise?): the other thing I love about this series is the humour. The characters are funny as hell and the dialogues are hilarious. There. See? I can make it quick and painless when I want to. It's just that most of the time I like to watch you suffer. 

►► Hold on for a second, I'm no quite done making this quick and painless! There is something else I love about this series! It's light and fun but it's not stupid! There is an actual non-stupid, entertaining plot in every instalment! And there is an actual non-stupid, entertaining series arc, too! So much so that my old, wise and highly intelligent self wouldn't dream of missing the next book in the series! Ha!



• Book 1: Nearly Departed in Deadwood ★★
• Book 2: Optical Delusions in Deadwood ★★★★
• Book 3: Dead Case in Deadwood ★★★★
• Book 4: Better Off Dead in Deadwood ★★★★
• Book 5: An Ex to Grind in Deadwood ★★★★
• Book 7: A Wild Fright in Deadwood ★★★★
• Book 8: Rattling the Heat in Deadwood  ★★★★
• Book 9: Gone Haunting in Deadwood ★★★
• Book 10: Don't Let it Snow in Deadwood ★★



[Pre-review nonsense]:

You. Cannot. Be. Serious. Ann. Charles. What do you mean the book is finished???!!! Just like that???!!! Mid-scene???!!!! WTH woman, how can you be so cruel???!!! Have you no mercy???!!! Now give me the next instalment before someone gets hurt.



►► Crappy review to come.



[August 14, 2015]:

I bet you've never heard of this series. Right. You're just as clueless as ever aren't you? Sigh. Let me enlighten you real quick:



And do you know what rating I gave book 1 in this series? Two stars. Yep, you read that right: TWO STARS. And yet here I am. Ha.

Meanwhile, Back in Deadwood

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