Name: In the Shadow of Eight
Rating: 3.333333333333333 (3 reviews)

Collin Gosselin

Surviving the Reality of My Childhood

In the Shadow of Eight

Yea sorry this is HELLA long … I had some shit to say. 

#ad much love for my finished copy @grandcentralpub #partner

In the words of Nina the beauty influencer, OOO CHILLLLD! Grab your popcorn, grab a drink, and listen here because this tea is PIPING HOT! ☕️ (something like that lol - idk why but it’s her voice I heard while starting this book). 

We watched it all unfold on our TVs. But what was happening behind those moments we thought were so precious was something we could have never have fathomed. We heard the rumors, the rumblings, watched a marriage fall apart, and accusations being flung left and right. But what we didn’t fully see were the innocent ones behind all that tabloid fodder. The children who weren’t asked their permission, the children who had no choices, the children who had no voices.

In the Shadow of Eight by Collin Gosselin has been making headlines that I’m sure you might have seen by now. But this book goes so much deeper than the he said/she said we’ve been watching play out in the media for years. Because now it’s time for Collin to tell his own story, in his own words. A child who will be silenced no more.

“Silence felt safer than truth…” (45).

Look, most of us probably gave Kate a lot of grace back then. She was raising EIGHT children. Most of us couldn’t even imagine everything that goes into that. Plus, she was doing it all on her own once the divorce came along. We have our hands full with two, three, four, or even five kids. So we gave some grace when we should have been asking questions instead. But at what point does discipline, structure, and maintaining order cross the line into abuse? There’s many ways..

And what happens when the adults surrounding those children witness things they know aren’t right and do nothing? Ugh. That was one of the hardest parts of this book for me. Reading Collin’s account of how he was treated, how he was excluded, and how many opportunities there were for an adult to step in and say or do something. We saw tiny glimpses of his childhood on television, but there was so much more happening when the cameras weren’t rolling - things that happened behind the cameras.

HOW can a mother treat her own son this way?! HOWWWW?! It’s amazing that even with the amount of pain Kate has caused Collin he still tries to understand her. You have such a special and thoughtful son Kate - WAKE TF UP. 

And don’t even get me started on the whole Dr. Phil situation. 😫 Another incident of him coming in and causing more damage than good. When will the world wake up to him and his scams.. 

Then there’s the issue of labeling children as the problem, medicating them, and expecting them to comply rather than asking WHY they’re struggling in the first place. How many of us experienced something similar growing up? How many children were punished for reacting to circumstances they had absolutely no control over?

I recently read The Night Hunter by Natalie Moss, and although it’s fiction, it explores how two children growing up in the exact same household can have two vastly different experiences. I kept thinking about that while reading this book. Eight children, all raised under the same roof, (well not exactly besides the two who got out) and this is only ONE of their stories. I can’t help but wonder what the others experienced, what they remember, and how differently or similarly they might view their childhoods compared to Collin’s. 

And that brings me to something else this book had me thinking about. About all the other children - anywhere - who went through similar experiences but never had a savior of sorts? Someone who stepped in and filled that void. Someone who remained a constant in their lives. Someone who showed them that all those horrible things they learned to believe about themselves during childhood weren’t actually true. That people don’t always leave. That love isn’t something you have to earn through obedience or perfection. That people can love you simply because you’re YOU.

What happens to the children who never get that? We know, but it’s something to think about. 

Society spends so much time telling children to be small, keep quiet, respect their elders, and obey. But WHEN WILL THE CHILDREN EVER START TO MATTER? When will we start listening instead of automatically assuming the adult must be right? That the children are the ones in the wrong? 

This was a brutal read for me personally. I experienced a lot of things similar to what Collin describes, so there were moments that hit incredibly close to home. It was heavy. It was heartbreaking. And there were times I had to sit with what I’d just read because I understood exactly what he was talking about. You aren’t alone bro, you aren’t alone. 

Collin is so brave to have told his story and I give him all the props! How hard it must have been to revisit those experiences, knowing the entire world is going to have an opinion about them and doing it anyways. Especially when you’ve spent so much of your life having other people tell your story for you.

There was one part that actually made me laugh, though. Collin’s acknowledgment:

“And last, but least, a special thank-you to my mom, Kate. Without you, none of this would’ve been possible.”

LMFAO. 🫣 I can absolutely appreciate the humor there.

But beneath that humor is a story that will weigh heavily on your heart. One that will break it. It’s devastating to read about a child who describes feeling rejected, singled out, and excluded by the very person who should have made him feel safe. He doesn’t just describe he, he lived it - and that is the hardest right there. 

And it really makes you think about how much the public actually doesn’t know about the families they watch on television. How easily narratives are created, how quickly we decide who’s the villain and who’s the hero, and how little we might know about what’s actually happening behind closed doors.

Who knew that the person the media built up was actually the villain this whole time, while the person they tore down was the hero - the one trying to protect a child, trying to find his child. And most of the general public had no clue.

I hope that one day Collin and his siblings can come together, find some understanding, and have the relationships they deserve with each other. It’s kind of sick a mother would do this to them. Divide them, influence them to have nothing to do with each other. Just sick. 

And yo, Kate, you might want to just sit this one out. Just STFU. Because watching the media back-and-forth since this book’s publication has been really eye opening. Collin finally has the space to tell his story, and he deserves to be heard without you trying to control the narrative.

This is so much more than just another celebrity memoir. It’s a heartbreaking look at childhood and growing up in the spotlight. It’s about family, power, silence, and what happens when the people who are supposed to protect children become the people those children need protection from. 

╰⪼ HOW DARE YOU NURSES! What a FKING DISGRACE!!!F 

╰⪼ I got a Code Yellow called on me. 🫠 Oof. I get it, bro. I freaking GET IT! 🫶🏻 Tackled, drugged, yep! How many of us are there? 

𝕆𝕥𝕙𝕖𝕣 ℚ𝕦𝕠𝕥𝕖𝕤: 

╰⪼ “We were crushed together like we were one thing instead of eight. That was the whole point of sardines. You didn't win by being alone. You won by finding each other.” (17). 

╰⪼ “By then, I wasn't just reacting to what was happening to me. I was starting to absorb it. Somewhere along the way, her version of the story began to feel more believable than my own. When a child is told often enough that they are the problem, the words start sounding like facts. I learned to see myself through other people's eyes before I ever learned how to trust my own. I became careful with my voice, with my face, with my body. I stopped asking for things. I stopped expecting help. I learned how to take up as little space as possible and still exist.” (66). 

𝔽𝕚𝕟𝕒𝕝 𝕋𝕙𝕠𝕦𝕘𝕙𝕥:

Another horrible and brutal read that really makes you think. At what point do we stop and question what we’re calling entertainment? Here’s another example of a child caught in the middle of something created for our enjoyment, and it’s kind of heartbreaking. Entertainment should NEVER come at the expense of innocent children. Who knows what Collin’s life would have looked like had they never been on TV - no one knows, but what we do know is that the fame got to Kate’s ego. She cared more about the money, the fame, and everything that came with it. Maybe she was already a monster hiding, just waiting to pounce, or maybe a television company made this monster. It’s probably a little of both. 

More and more memoirs like this have been coming out over the past few years, and I know there are more to come. These stories are so important because they force us to look beyond what we see on our screens and consider what is happening behind the scenes, especially to the children who never had a choice in any of it.

Whether it’s a TV show, a YouTube channel, or any other form of media, we need to do better. These memoirs are crucial reads, and I hope we’re not just reading them, feeling horrified, and then moving on to the next book, the next memoir. I hope we’re actually learning something from them.

Heather

Yea sorry this is HELLA long … I had some shit to say. 

#ad much love for my finished copy @grandcentralpub #partner

In the Shadow of Eight

< @

ᴀᴠᴀɪʟᴀʙʟᴇ ɴᴏᴡ

In the words of Nina the beauty influencer, OOO CHILLLLD! Grab your popcorn, grab a drink, and listen here because this tea is PIPING HOT! ☕️ (something like that lol - idk why but it’s her voice I heard while starting this book). 

We watched it all unfold on our TVs. But what was happening behind those moments we thought were so precious was something we could have never have fathomed. We heard the rumors, the rumblings, watched a marriage fall apart, and accusations being flung left and right. But what we didn’t fully see were the innocent ones behind all that tabloid fodder. The children who weren’t asked their permission, the children who had no choices, the children who had no voices.

Until now…

In the Shadow of Eight by Collin Gosselin has been making headlines that I’m sure you might have seen by now. But this book goes so much deeper than the he said/she said we’ve been watching play out in the media for years. Because now it’s time for Collin to tell his own story, in his own words. A child who will be silenced no more.

“Silence felt safer than truth…” (45).

Look, most of us probably gave Kate a lot of grace back then. She was raising EIGHT children. Most of us couldn’t even imagine everything that goes into that. Plus, she was doing it all on her own once the divorce came along. We have our hands full with two, three, four, or even five kids. So we gave some grace when we should have been asking questions instead. But at what point does discipline, structure, and maintaining order cross the line into abuse? There’s many ways..

And what happens when the adults surrounding those children witness things they know aren’t right and do nothing? Ugh. That was one of the hardest parts of this book for me. Reading Collin’s account of how he was treated, how he was excluded, and how many opportunities there were for an adult to step in and say or do something. We saw tiny glimpses of his childhood on television, but there was so much more happening when the cameras weren’t rolling - things that happened behind the cameras.

HOW can a mother treat her own son this way?! HOWWWW?! It’s amazing that even with the amount of pain Kate has caused Collin he still tries to understand her. You have such a special and thoughtful son Kate - WAKE TF UP. 

And don’t even get me started on the whole Dr. Phil situation. 😫 Another incident of him coming in and causing more damage than good. When will the world wake up to him and his scams.. 

Then there’s the issue of labeling children as the problem, medicating them, and expecting them to comply rather than asking WHY they’re struggling in the first place. How many of us experienced something similar growing up? How many children were punished for reacting to circumstances they had absolutely no control over?

This world, this society, is WILD.

I recently read The Night Hunter by Natalie Moss, and although it’s fiction, it explores how two children growing up in the exact same household can have two vastly different experiences. I kept thinking about that while reading this book. Eight children, all raised under the same roof, (well not exactly besides the two who got out) and this is only ONE of their stories. I can’t help but wonder what the others experienced, what they remember, and how differently or similarly they might view their childhoods compared to Collin’s. 

And that brings me to something else this book had me thinking about. About all the other children - anywhere - who went through similar experiences but never had a savior of sorts? Someone who stepped in and filled that void. Someone who remained a constant in their lives. Someone who showed them that all those horrible things they learned to believe about themselves during childhood weren’t actually true. That people don’t always leave. That love isn’t something you have to earn through obedience or perfection. That people can love you simply because you’re YOU.

What happens to the children who never get that? We know, but it’s something to think about. 

Society spends so much time telling children to be small, keep quiet, respect their elders, and obey. But WHEN WILL THE CHILDREN EVER START TO MATTER? When will we start listening instead of automatically assuming the adult must be right? That the children are the ones in the wrong? 

This was a brutal read for me personally. I experienced a lot of things similar to what Collin describes, so there were moments that hit incredibly close to home. It was heavy. It was heartbreaking. And there were times I had to sit with what I’d just read because I understood exactly what he was talking about. You aren’t alone bro, you aren’t alone. 

Collin is so brave to have told his story and I give him all the props! How hard it must have been to revisit those experiences, knowing the entire world is going to have an opinion about them and doing it anyways. Especially when you’ve spent so much of your life having other people tell your story for you.

There was one part that actually made me laugh, though. Collin’s acknowledgment:

“And last, but least, a special thank-you to my mom, Kate. Without you, none of this would’ve been possible.”

LMFAO. 🫣 I can absolutely appreciate the humor there.

But beneath that humor is a story that will weigh heavily on your heart. One that will break it. It’s devastating to read about a child who describes feeling rejected, singled out, and excluded by the very person who should have made him feel safe. He doesn’t just describe he, he lived it - and that is the hardest right there. 

And it really makes you think about how much the public actually doesn’t know about the families they watch on television. How easily narratives are created, how quickly we decide who’s the villain and who’s the hero, and how little we might know about what’s actually happening behind closed doors.

Who knew that the person the media built up was actually the villain this whole time, while the person they tore down was the hero - the one trying to protect a child, trying to find his child. And most of the general public had no clue.

I hope that one day Collin and his siblings can come together, find some understanding, and have the relationships they deserve with each other. It’s kind of sick a mother would do this to them. Divide them, influence them to have nothing to do with each other. Just sick. 

And yo, Kate, you might want to just sit this one out. Just STFU. Because watching the media back-and-forth since this book’s publication has been really eye opening. Collin finally has the space to tell his story, and he deserves to be heard without you trying to control the narrative.

Because, WE STAND WITH COLLIN!

GAME OVER Kate. 

This is so much more than just another celebrity memoir. It’s a heartbreaking look at childhood and growing up in the spotlight. It’s about family, power, silence, and what happens when the people who are supposed to protect children become the people those children need protection from. 

𝕄𝕖𝕞𝕠𝕣𝕒𝕓𝕝𝕖: 

╰⪼ Scooter incident 😫😭

╰⪼ HOW DARE YOU NURSES! What a FKING DISGRACE!!!F 

╰⪼ I got a Code Yellow called on me. 🫠 Oof. I get it, bro. I freaking GET IT! 🫶🏻 Tackled, drugged, yep! How many of us are there? 

𝕆𝕥𝕙𝕖𝕣 ℚ𝕦𝕠𝕥𝕖𝕤: 

╰⪼ “We were crushed together like we were one thing instead of eight. That was the whole point of sardines. You didn't win by being alone. You won by finding each other.” (17). 

╰⪼ “By then, I wasn't just reacting to what was happening to me. I was starting to absorb it. Somewhere along the way, her version of the story began to feel more believable than my own. When a child is told often enough that they are the problem, the words start sounding like facts. I learned to see myself through other people's eyes before I ever learned how to trust my own. I became careful with my voice, with my face, with my body. I stopped asking for things. I stopped expecting help. I learned how to take up as little space as possible and still exist.” (66). 

𝔽𝕚𝕟𝕒𝕝 𝕋𝕙𝕠𝕦𝕘𝕙𝕥:

Another horrible and brutal read that really makes you think. At what point do we stop and question what we’re calling entertainment? Here’s another example of a child caught in the middle of something created for our enjoyment, and it’s kind of heartbreaking. Entertainment should NEVER come at the expense of innocent children. Who knows what Collin’s life would have looked like had they never been on TV - no one knows, but what we do know is that the fame got to Kate’s ego. She cared more about the money, the fame, and everything that came with it. Maybe she was already a monster hiding, just waiting to pounce, or maybe a television company made this monster. It’s probably a little of both. 

More and more memoirs like this have been coming out over the past few years, and I know there are more to come. These stories are so important because they force us to look beyond what we see on our screens and consider what is happening behind the scenes, especially to the children who never had a choice in any of it.

Whether it’s a TV show, a YouTube channel, or any other form of media, we need to do better. These memoirs are crucial reads, and I hope we’re not just reading them, feeling horrified, and then moving on to the next book, the next memoir. I hope we’re actually learning something from them.

absolutely horrified that for a former child star (used loosely here) that lived a highly televised life from birth had no one able to intervene on his behalf and get failed every step of the way. collin is incredibly brave for speaking out about his experiences, and offers more kindness to his abuser than anyone else in his position would give. he prefaces the horrific details of his childhood with acknowledging that his version of events may not best represent other people’s sides… which i think actually does more to discredit his detractors. i believe him, and i wish him peace. 

In the Shadow of Eight Surviving the Reality of My Childhood

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