Kyung-Sook Shin

Chi-Young Kim

An American release of an award-winning South Korean best-seller follows the efforts of a family to find the mother who went missing from Seoul Station and their sobering realizations when they recall memories that suggest she may not have been happy. Reprint.

A Novel

Please Look After Mom

Lindy

Even though nobody knew that you were in my life, you were the person who brought a raft at every rapid current and helped me cross that water safely. 

It's your life, and you're my daughter, my daughter with the amazing ability to concentrate when you solve problems. Of course you would find a solution for your situation. 

Even now, when Mom's missing. When you call out "Mom," you want to believe that she's healthy. That Mom is strong. That Mom isn't fazed by anything. That Mom is the person you want to call whenever you despair about something in this city. 

doxi 

“I will let go of you now. You were my secret. You were in my life, someone whose presence would never be guessed by anyone who knew me. Even though nobody knew that you were in my life, you were the person who brought a raft at every rapid current and helped me cross that water safely. I was happy that you were there. I came to tell you that I was able to travel through my life because I could come to you when I was anxious, not when I was happy.”

“To you, Mom was always Mom. It never occurred to you that she had once taken her first step, or had once been three or twelve or twenty years old. Mom was Mom. She was born as Mom. Until you saw her running to your uncle like that, it hadn’t dawned on you that she was a human being who harbored the exact same feeling you had for your own brothers, and this realization led to the awareness that she, too, had had a childhood. From then on, you sometimes thought of Mom as a child, as a girl, as a young woman, as a newlywed, as a mother who had just given birth to you.”

Follows the efforts of a family to find the mother who went missing from Seoul Station and their sobering realizations when they recall memories that suggest she may not have been happy.

Please Look After Mother

I can feel the emotions of the characters although it can get confusing at times. Overall an okay book with a pretty touching ending.

Natasha Mok

Please Look After Mother is the story of So-nyo, a wife and mother, who has lived a life of sacrifice and compromise. In the past she suffered a stroke, leaving her vulnerable and often confused. Now, travelling from the Korean countryside to the Seoul of her grown-up children, So-nyo is separated from her husband when the doors close on a packed train. As her children and husband search the streets, they recall So-nyo's life, and all they have left unsaid. Through their piercing voices, we begin to discover the desires, heartaches, and secrets she harboured within. And as the mystery of her disappearance unravels, we uncover a larger mystery, that of all mothers and children: how affection, exasperation, hope and guilt add up to love. Compassionate, redemptive and beautifully written, Please Look After Mother will reconnect you to the story of your own family, and to the forgotten sacrifices that lie at its heart.

dian

everytime i think about this book i always find myself wanting to pull my hair off its roots and missing my mom even more. God i wish i could give my mother the life she deserves.

Hannah Yoon

While living in Seoul I saw this book at every bookstore I visited. I always made a mental note to myself, "check it out while you're here" but I never did. After coming back home to Canada I found it on my parent's shelf and decided to read it. It's a really easy read though at times confusing, only because the point of view changes and it took me some time to figure out who was talking and whom they were talking to. 
I knew it would challenge me in the way I relate to my own Korean parents and it took me to the past more often than I would have liked it to. I was moved by the regrets and questions of each character. A lot of my own shortcomings and failure as a daughter were highlighted as I read this and had to resist the tears from flowing. I couldn't hold it in halfway through as their pain and regrets became my own. It definitely made me realize that my mom is more than a mom. She was once a young girl, a teenager, a young adult and a wife before she was a mom. What were her dreams? Is she happy now? How much do I know and not know of my mom? 
I loved how different parts of the culture and country were described in this book all in English. 
I'd definitely recommend it to everyone, but especially those of Korean descent.

Isabella 

it’s emotional but i just couldn’t get into the writing idk if its because of the translation or what nevertheless still a good read

WINNER OF THE MAN ASIAN LITERARY PRIZE When sixty-nine-year-old So-nyo is separated from her husband among the crowds of the Seoul subway station, her family begins a desperate search to find her. Yet as long-held secrets and private sorrows begin to reveal themselves, they are forced to wonder: how well did they actually know the woman they called Mother? Told through the piercing voices and urgent perspectives of a daughter, son, husband, and mother, PLEASE LOOK AFTER MOTHER is at once an authentic picture of contemporary life in Korea and a universal story of family love. 'Kyung-Sook Shin's tale... has hit a nerve' Guardian 'A raw tribute to the mysteries of motherhood' New York Times Book Review 'The most moving and accomplished, and often startling, novel' Wall Street Journal

Laurianne

“To you, Mom was always Mom. It never occurred to you that she had once taken her first step, or had once been three or twelve or twenty years old. Mom was Mom. She was born as Mom. Until you saw her running to your uncle like that, it hadn’t dawned on you that she was a human being who harbored the exact same feeling you had for your own brothers, and this realization led to the awareness that she, too, had had a childhood. From then on, you sometimes thought of Mom as a child, as a girl, as a young woman, as a newlywed, as a mother who had just given birth to you.”

When I tell you I was crying hysterically throughout the whole thing, it held no ounce of lie, only truth in its entirety. The book is divided into four parts, four point of views. Each one so unique. First of the daughter, second of the eldest son, third of the husband, and fourth of the mom. It was an emotional read yet strangely it, too, provided me warmth and comfort that I would hold in my heart for a very long time.

While reading, I was reminded of the words I heard somewhere, that we oft forget that it's the first time our mom living a life. So please be gentle on her. Mom isn't a hero, she's a human being like us, who makes mistakes, who loves her child with the whole of her heart. It makes me appreciate my mom more. Hugs for all moms out there. ❤️

zainab

absolutely incredible piece of literature. genuinely an important read

milly

4.5**

Literally after 5 mins of logging this I burst into tears…i think it hit me all at once. Honestly i loved this might change the rating once i sit with it a little longer.

big ab

i sobbed like a baby reading this. genuinely cried multiple times.

Laura Mauler

Honestly heartbreaking. I have never ever been so glad of always being nice to my mom and thinking of her as her own person. We, as a society, have to acknowledge women as having a role aside from motherhood, and actually getting to know the mothers around us. Truly broke my heart. 

But the writing was very easy to read, but also very easy to drop. Didn´t find the different narrator voices confusing, and they were nicely tied together. It was nice to start the chapters not knowing who was talking, but figuring it out soon after. 

Denisse Garcia Ramírez 

Honestly heartbreaking. I have never ever been so glad of always being nice to my mom and thinking of her as her own person. We, as a society, have to acknowledge women as having a role aside from motherhood, and actually getting to know the mothers around us. Truly broke my heart. 

But the writing was very easy to read, but also very easy to drop. Didn´t find the different narrator voices confusing, and they were nicely tied together. It was nice to start the chapters not knowing who was talking, but figuring it out soon after. 

Anyaconda

A very depressing book with a huge impact. I can't say I enjoyed reading it, but the topics discussed are really important. I'll give this 4 stars, but will probably never re-read it. 
I'm excited though for the second book, which I got an eARC for.

kim♡

** spoiler alert **
           torn between giving this a three-star or a four-star but i'll go with the latter. mom's connection (secret relationship) with eungyu broke my heart. how a stranger can offer her more comfort than her husband.

sarah

Trish

❝ His heart brims with the desire to do nothing but look after Mom when she’s found. 

But he has already lost that chance. ❞

——

Please Look After Mom is a story, at its core, about regret. A mother, a wife, has gone missing, and the family who is frantically looking for her are plagued by the unbearable feeling that they spent the majority of their lives taking her presence for granted. 

Absence makes the heart grow fonder, and this novel is the exploration of that well known idiom. 

How does that happen? How does life get so hectic that we lose focus of what is most important? How do we forget to pay attention to the person who gave us life? There was a time for each of us when Mom was the center of the universe. At some indistinct point, as we take in more of the world, that focus shifts and we have friends, colleagues, significant others, children, all who take up and demand the energy and devotion that once, at the beginning of time, belonged undivided to our mothers. 

——

❝ Last New Year’s Eve, I wrote down what I wanted to do with my life, other than writing. Just for fun. The things I wanted to do in the next ten years. But I didn’t plan on doing anything with Mom. I didn’t realize that while I was writing it. But now, when I look at it after Mom’s gone missing… ❞

——

Is it an unfair law of nature that children forever remain the center of their Mom’s world? That Mom never stops longing and wishing for her kids’ happiness? That she measures her life’s success by the talents, virtues and accomplishments of her children and not her own? 

——

Thought-provoking, utterly heartbreaking and unbearably haunting, this novel puts a mirror in front of every reader and says: How well do you know your Mom? What do you do to show her you care about her? When was the last time you said you love her? Was it today? If not, why not? 

What if she’s gone tomorrow? Disappears, like thin air?

Do you know enough about her daily routine, the people she meets, the places she goes, her innermost desires and dreams? 

Could you find her?

Gulshan Hasanzada

Anaya həsr olunmuş kədərli simfoniya

İlk öncə onu deyim ki, nəql etmə üslubuna heyran qaldım, hər fəsildə oxucuya, obrazlardan birinin yerinə qoyulurmuş kimi sən deyə müraciət olunur və hadisələri sanki yaşamışsan kimi bir tbt oxuyursan, bax bu stil möhtəşəmdir, müəllifin başqa kitablarını da dəyərləndirəcəm bunun üçün. 

Ana hekayəsi - ailə hekayəsi - ən böyük sevgi hekayəsidir. Qəlbimizdə yatan ən dərin hisslərə və dəyərlərə toxunan bir romandır. Nə deyim? Məndən sonra oxumaq qərarına gəlsəniz, çox təşəkkür edəcəksiniz, üzümə deməsəniz də)

wildemononoke

daisy

the perfect book to end this year for me, after reading this i finally realized how big the sacrifice some mothers made for their children (ps. i cried a lot while reading this, especially in the 'i'm home' chapter)

You will never think of your mother the same way after you read this book. Already an international sensation and a bestseller that has sold over 1.5 million copies in the author's native Korea, Please Look After Mom is a stunning, deeply moving story of a family's search for their missing mother — and their discovery of the desires, heartaches and secrets they never realized she harbored within. When sixty-nine-year-old So-nyo is separated from her husband among the crowds of the Seoul subway station, and vanishes, their children are consumed with loud recriminations, and are awash in sorrow and guilt. As they argue over the "Missing" flyers they are posting throughout the city — how large of a reward to offer, the best way to phrase the text — they realize that none of them have a recent photograph of Mom. Soon a larger question emerges: do they really know the woman they called Mom? Told by the alternating voices of Mom's daughter, son, her husband and, in the shattering conclusion, by Mom herself, the novel pieces together, Rashomon-style, a life that appears ordinary but is anything but. This is a mystery of one mother that reveals itself to be the mystery of all our mothers: about her triumphs and disappointments and about who she is on her own terms, separate from who she is to her family. If you have ever been a daughter, a son, a husband or a mother, Please Look After Mom is a revelation — one that will bring tears to your eyes.

Jenna Kathleen

I'm having a hard time deciding if I actually liked this book or not. It's not the type of book I'd typically pick up, but I'm trying to make a point of reading more Korean authors (even if I'm just reading the English version for now) since I moved here.

The story is told from four different perspectives, three of which are told in the second person. Anyone who knows what I like to read knows I have a lot of issues with second person narratives. I find them distracting and difficult to read. I feel as if I am pressured from the very beginning to jump into the shoes of a character rather than to slowly ease into them as I get to know them. Having three different perspectives in the second person, even though they are clearly divided, made it difficult to focus on the story and I was too busy trying to understand another character.

What I did love about this book were the themes and messages. It really is a contemplation of how you think about your parents and elders in your life, especially your mom. It doesn't just tell the story of the mom, but of how her kids come to look at their mom as a regular person rather than their caregiver. While this story is a very extreme example of how we sometimes don't notice when our mothers make sacrifices for us, it does beg you to evaluate your own relationship with your mother and notice her as her own self.

Kath Lau

MY review here http://frothmagazine.com/book-review-...

anita🌼

This book was achingly sad and beautiful and it really made me think about the bonds we have with the people around us and how we can't really know them. 

PLEASE LOOK AFTER MOTHER is the story of So-nyo, a wife and mother, who has lived a life of sacrifice and compromise. In the past she suffered a stroke, leaving her vulnerable and often confused. Now, travelling from the Korean countryside to the Seoul of her grown-up children, So-nyo is separated from her husband when the doors close on a packed train. As her children and husband search the streets, they recall So-nyo's life, and all they have left unsaid. Through their piercing voices, we begin to discover the desires, heartaches, and secrets she harboured within. And as the mystery of her disappearance unravels, we uncover a larger mystery, that of all mothers and children: how affection, exasperation, hope and guilt add up to love. Compassionate, redemptive and beautifully written, PLEASE LOOK AFTER MOTHER will reconnect you to the story of your own family, and to the forgotten sacrifices that lie at its heart.

Please Look after Mother

Farhana

How much I enjoyed the book: 9/10
How well I think it was written: 10/10

It takes a powerful book to leave me speechless and this is one of them. The book itself isn’t very long – 261 pages – or very difficult to understand; however the actual story and writing are so profound that I can’t even begin to comment on it without going into essay mode. On the other hand, Please Look After Mother was originally written in Korean and later translated into English which unfortunately makes for awkward reading at times. I also think this is very much a book that is more easily understood with prior knowledge of Korean society and culture. Luckily, I happen to be a sucker for asian dramas and have a pretty good awareness (I would never say I fully understand or know first hand though!) of South Korean culture. If you can look past both of those factors, I assure you Please Look After Mother is a must-read.

The story itself is even more heartbreaking than the synopsis suggests. I make no exaggeration when I say that this is the saddest, yet most compelling book I’ve ever read. Please Look After Mother grabbed my heart within the first few pages, it then proceeded to gradually shave off layer after layer until all that was left was a cross section no thicker than a single strand of hair; blown away by the cold air that had taken refuge where my heart should have been. Suffice to say, once I had finished reading I felt so emotionally drained – I didn’t even have the tears left in me to cry.

The primary focus of the book is of course the Mother – though I wouldn’t call her a protagonist – which is exactly the reason that I found myself so deeply affected by the book. Your relationship with your mother is the first and most important you’ll ever have with another human, so to witness the immediate and later effects of a loss of this relationship is poignant. I know it’s something I fear myself and so I was left not only devastated, but also found myself regularly contemplating on my relationship with my own mother. It’s so easy to forget how important your mother actually is and how much she has given up for you. (Especially in Western society where children tend to be a lot more ungrateful - Super Nanny anyone?) I think this is even more meaningful in any family with a stay-at-home mother – we forget that our mothers were once like us: without responsibility, without the title of Mother and simply a woman. Not only does Please Look After Mother remind you of all of these things, but it also reminds you that your time with this precious person is limited.

Of course the symbol of the Mother can easily be replaced by your Father, Brother, Sister, Husband, Wife etc. the message remains the same, regardless.

Please Look After Mom A Novel

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