Lex Croucher

A Novel

Gwen and Art Are Not in Love

Eilidh 

"Don't wink at him," Gwen said. "The point is to make it seem like we're getting together, not that this is some kind of... mildly incestuous free-for-all."

"Hullo, you old bastard," he said flatly. "Shagged any of your sisters lately?"

"I've died," Arthur said dramatically from the floor. Gwen snorted.

"Not yet. But if I kill you now, I can just say you choked on your own vomit and nobody will be any the wiser." 

"Arthur is very sensitive about the fact that we're the same height," Gwen said to Gabriel by way of explanation. "He exaggerates, because if I'm a gigantic women, then he can pretend he's an average sized man."

"So you don't want any wine then," Sidney said. Gwendoline gave him a withering look. 

"I'm going back to go back to my bedroom to read," she said. "You can sit out here and drink as much as you want. Just let me know when our great romance is over for the evening." 

So far, this is the kind of book you know eventually picks up so you're just reading to get to that part. Also did this book even have an editor.

...already rehearsing the charming niceties key to the acquisition of snacks

Oh, author must have CACKLED writing this.

"Let's just agree to be straight with each other," he said slowly.

"I am living with the consequences right now," Arthur said bitterly. "I am drinking juice with the consequences."

'There's no separating the two,' Gabriel said quietly. 'I 

"I'll be the judge of that. I'm very familiar with stupidity."

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