Name: My Dark Vanessa
ISBN: 9780008342289

Kate Elizabeth Russell

An era-defining novel about the relationship between a fifteen-year-old girl and her teacher ALL HE DID WAS FALL IN LOVE WITH ME AND THE WORLD TURNED HIM INTO A MONSTER Vanessa Wye was fifteen-years-old when she first had sex with her English teacher. She is now thirty-two and in the storm of allegations against powerful men in 2017, the teacher, Jacob Strane, has just been accused of sexual abuse by another former student. Vanessa is horrified by this news, because she is quite certain that the relationship she had with Strane wasn't abuse. It was love. She's sure of that. Forced to rethink her past, to revisit everything that happened, Vanessa has to redefine the great love story of her life - her great sexual awakening - as rape. Now she must deal with the possibility that she might be a victim, and just one of many. Nuanced, uncomfortable, bold and powerful, My Dark Vanessa goes straight to the heart of some of the most complex issues of our age.

My Dark Vanessa

Gem Koeman

Darshini ✨

Lulu Evensen

clara

Gisselle Vazquez

Ribs

Keya Markham

Ian Brakspear

dilara sener

Lindsay

2000: Bright, ambitious fifteen-year-old Vanessa Wye becomes entangled in an affair with Jacob Strane, her guileful forty-two-year-old English teacher. 2017: Strane has been accused of sexual abuse by a former student, who reaches out to Vanessa. Now Vanessa finds herself facing an impossible choice: remain silent, firm in the belief that her teenage self willingly engaged in this relationship, or redefine herself and the events of her past. But how can Vanessa reject her first love, the man who fundamentally transformed her and has been a persistent presence in her life? -- adapted from jacket

this book is one that made me want to study themes, delve deeper, and also peel my skin off! it’s so well built, well understood and a super interesting take on power imbalance dynamics. some parts were a little on the nose, certain sentences felt like they could have just been the reader’s on thoughts of a situation - but they were forced on you and it felt a little like babying? like leave some to the imagination. mega fucked up but unputdownable

There were moments throughout this book where I had a physiological response, that stomach sinking feeling, knot in your throat, in those moments of danger. Reading this book was uncomfortable, which is necessitated given the themes of the book. It was especially sad to me when I realized Vanessa had yet to fully begin to unpack the extent of her abuse. It also left me unsettled to think the inflictor was able to cowardly escape the repercussions of his actions, that Vanessa was not able to face Strane in his true light, to force him to face the child and young woman he abused. So devastating but so raw.

Karen

The book was very well written but I would never recommend it to anyone.

The fmc was unlikeable but not in a way that allows you to hate her. As much as she denies it or refuses to see the truth, she was so deeply traumatized. The teachers (yes, plural) made me sick to my stomach.

The ending didn't give me the closure I was hoping for. It wouldn't have been fair otherwise, I suppose, since the women didn't get any closure either.

Sophia

The book was very well written but I would never recommend it to anyone.

The fmc was unlikeable but not in a way that allows you to hate her. As much as she denies it or refuses to see the truth, she was so deeply traumatized. The teachers (yes, plural) made me sick to my stomach.

The ending didn't give me the closure I was hoping for. It wouldn't have been fair otherwise, I suppose, since the women didn't get any closure either.

INSTANT NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER “Russell manages a brutal originality. . . . [an] exceedingly complex, inventive, resourceful examination of harm and power.” —The New York Times Book Review, Editors’ Choice “To call this book a ‘conversation piece’ or ‘an important book’ feels belittling . . . [it] is so much more than that. It’s a lightning rod. A brilliantly crafted novel.”—The Washington Post A most anticipated book by The New York Times • USA Today • Entertainment Weekly • Marie Claire • Elle • Harper's Bazaar • Bustle • Newsweek • New York Post • Esquire • Real Simple • The Sunday Times • The Guardian Exploring the psychological dynamics of the relationship between a precocious yet naïve teenage girl and her magnetic and manipulative teacher, a brilliant, all-consuming read that marks the explosive debut of an extraordinary new writer. 2000. Bright, ambitious, and yearning for adulthood, fifteen-year-old Vanessa Wye becomes entangled in an affair with Jacob Strane, her magnetic and guileful forty-two-year-old English teacher. 2017. Amid the rising wave of allegations against powerful men, a reckoning is coming due. Strane has been accused of sexual abuse by a former student, who reaches out to Vanessa, and now Vanessa suddenly finds herself facing an impossible choice: remain silent, firm in the belief that her teenage self willingly engaged in this relationship, or redefine herself and the events of her past. But how can Vanessa reject her first love, the man who fundamentally transformed her and has been a persistent presence in her life? Is it possible that the man she loved as a teenager—and who professed to worship only her—may be far different from what she has always believed? Alternating between Vanessa’s present and her past, My Dark Vanessa juxtaposes memory and trauma with the breathless excitement of a teenage girl discovering the power her own body can wield. Thought-provoking and impossible to put down, this is a masterful portrayal of troubled adolescence and its repercussions that raises vital questions about agency, consent, complicity, and victimhood. Written with the haunting intimacy of The Girls and the creeping intensity of Room, My Dark Vanessa is an era-defining novel that brilliantly captures and reflects the shifting cultural mores transforming our relationships and society itself.

A Novel

she just needed it to be a love story. because it was a whole life wasted. i am screaming crying and throwing up😭😭

jana 

I’ll be staring at the wall for the foreseeable future

Anna Oeltjenbruns

This was a difficult read but it was worth it. The book being told through the victims pov made the book more interesting. I felt so much rage because she wasn’t doing “what I would’ve done” but I think that made the book better. I think we’re supposed to get angry and/or feel pity. 

🥔

I really enjoyed 'My Dark Vanessa' despite feeling so much rage at the horror of what I was reading. I'm so glad Kate Elizabeth Russell decided to write from Vanessa's perspective rather than that of her teacher, despite being told that her voice would be unrelatable. It was just so well written, and really put into perspective the often insidious nature of grooming, and the means in which it has been 

Rebecca Bream

I really enjoyed 'My Dark Vanessa' despite feeling so much rage at the horror of what I was reading. I'm so glad Kate Elizabeth Russell decided to write from Vanessa's perspective rather than that of her teacher, despite being told that her voice would be unrelatable. It was just so well written, and really put into perspective the often insidious nature of grooming, and the means in which it has been allowed to take place. 

My Dark Vanessa was an incredibly difficult but worthwhile read. The writing is so vivid that it made my skin crawl, hence I had to pace myself a lot when reading it. Nonetheless, I think it provides a well-needed perspective on surviving sexual assault and grooming, I think this book has a lot of uncomfortable truths in it. How we as a society have a certain understanding of what it means to be a victim and how victims should behave,  and when this expectations are not met we usually become suspicious. There is no such thing as a perfect victim and My Dark Vanessa makes this clear.

As well as that My Dark Vanessa highlight exactly how destructive grooming is, and how its effects last a lifetime, it also shows that no two victims are the same. Therefore I think this can be a beneficial book to read to understand and tackle these heavy themes. I will advise however is child sexual assault, grooming or victim blaming are triggering topic for you, it maybe better for you to steer clear, as everything in the book is described in excruciating detail

Marz 

My Dark Vanessa was an incredibly difficult but worthwhile read. The writing is so vivid that it made my skin crawl, hence I had to pace myself a lot when reading it. Nonetheless, I think it provides a well-needed perspective on surviving sexual assault and grooming, I think this book has a lot of uncomfortable truths in it. How we as a society have a certain understanding of what it means to be a victim and how victims should behave,  and when this expectations are not met we usually become suspicious. There is no such thing as a perfect victim and My Dark Vanessa makes this clear.
As well as that My Dark Vanessa highlight exactly how destructive grooming is, and how its effects last a lifetime, it also shows that no two victims are the same. Therefore I think this can be a beneficial book to read to understand and tackle these heavy themes. I will advise however is child sexual assault, grooming or victim blaming are triggering topic for you, it maybe better for you to steer clear, as everything in the book is described in excruciating detail

Elena Favret

radhika dhawan

i have never felt this much visceral anger towards a book (but in a good way because it seems like that’s the author’s goal)

emelia grace ilgner

totally engaging. couldn’t put it down. masterclass in conflict and characters.

Ryan Mateyk

wow i'm surprised by how much i enjoyed this (though "enjoyed" is kind of a strange way to describe reading this book). the writing was impeccable, vanessa was such a complex character, and it deftly deals with touchy subjects.

Kaitlin Simpson

Well Written

This book is written very well, but the subject matter is so dark and heavy it’s hard to read at some points.

lex 📖

the last line of the book really hits. its her realizing that she can let go. all of this is coming to light and she can finally start her life freely without the restraints of strane. the portrayal of her denial and her rationalization of what he did to her and how he hurt her scratches an itch in my brain i dont like. the disassociation back to her safe place on the ice, gliding along the surface is in my opinion written beautifully. Overall, good book. a bit heavy, 9/10 :) 

Elisavet Rozaki 

maya

this was written so beautifully but it was so so so hard to read, yet so important. 

(this deserves 5 stars but i would never want to experience it again)

Lis Amorelli

Liked this enough, was a bit miffed by detailed descriptions of sex while she was underage… but it’s very real. I was concerned if this was to romanticize the “Lolita” dynamic just as poorly as that story did, but I was pleasantly surprised. Also a very good portrayal of the imperfect victim. Being a victim doesn’t mean you’re forced to speak out, to fix the wrongs with your experience and to serve justice.

no rating…but..this was definitely a book!

Raven 

Caroline

It's been a while since I finished reading this book and I'm still wrapping my head around it. My Dark Vanessa is an extraordinary and beautifully written debut by kate Elizabeth Russell. The character of Vanessa is very relatable as the story of Vanessa wye can be any teenage girls story, who like Vanessa may have strongly believed its was true love and as a adult is still failing to acknowledge that she was once a victim of sexual abuse. I loved the way the author touches on the subject of sexual abuse and how a sexual assault as a teenager can change ones whole life forever. 

The way the book alternate between past and present of Vanessa life makes it more interesting to read. The explicit sexual scenes can be a bit discomforting at times though. 

The book also a draws in a lot of context from the book LOLITA but only told this time from the victims prospective. 

My Dark Vanessa was not a easy read but a one I'm glad I read. I highly recommend reading this book. But be cautious, as this book triggers content warning of sexual abuse and sexual intimate scenes.

well. as blunt and possibly even rude it is to say, vanessa is unbearable, HOWEVER she is genuinely a good character study of how grooming truly affects kidss/teenagers and shapes them into the person the groomer wants them to be. of course i sympathize with her and understand why she thinks the way he does and goes out on such a limb to believe she needed to protect strane and blame herself for everything. it's understandable that she is unbearable and couldnt even stomach the thought of herself being a victim, given how strane spoke and acted with her. my god, taylor truly said it best about the way he speaks to the girls and making himself a victim and as if they're the ones in charge. anyway the book was honestly well written, intense and incredibly interesting. 

My Dark Vanessa

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