Nancy Kline

What if all it took to counter political polarisation, relationship problems and workplace rivalries was a single promise? For the past few decades, Nancy Kline has been investigating the optimal conditions that lead to independent thinking. Building on her 'thinking environment' framework, here she reveals the many ways in which the pressures of conformity, inequality and technology prevent us from having meaningful, life-enhancing conversations. Guided by the science of attention, she shares exercises and case studies of students and employees who have improved their performance through guided thinking sessions as well as families and couples who bonded after making - and enforcing - the promise. I Won't Interrupt You is a practical and systematic guide to how promising to reduce interruptions will lead to better relationships and calmer lives.

I Won't Interrupt You

The Promise That Changes Everything

Linus Stieldorf

What are three things you can do before your next meeting so that when people arrive they feel, just fromn the room, that they matter? About the listener: How can you communicate to your listener the importance of their keeping their eyes on your eyes so that their eyes and their face respond accurately to the micro signals of change in your thinking? About your body: What one thing do you know you need to do so that your body can say to you, "You matter'?

First, I told people whyl wanted to make this change: we need the best ideas around here and if we promise not to interrupt each other, ideas will increase and improve. I explained that not inter- rupting is more sophisticated than merely shutting up and waiting for someone to finish, that it means giving people attention driven by interest in where they will go next with their thinking, being pro- portional in our turns, not hogging the show. 

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