Name: Ransom My Heart
ISBN: 9780061700071

Meg Cabot

Mia Thermopolis

Mia Thermopolis, Princess of Genovia and star of Meg Cabot's insanely popular #1 New York Times bestselling Princess Diaries books, has "penned" her first historical romance novel . . . with help from Meg Cabot He's a tall, handsome knight with a secret. She's an adventurous beauty with more than a few secrets of her own. Finnula needs money for her sister's dowry, and fast. Hugo Fitzstephen, returning home to England from the Crusades with saddlebags of jewels, has money, and lots of it. What could be simpler than to kidnap him and hold him for ransom? Well, for starters, Finnula could make the terrible mistake of falling in love with her hostage. Princess Mia Thermopolis, Meg Cabot's most beloved character, has always been an outspoken animal-rights activist and committed environmentalist. In keeping with Mia's true spirit, Meg will be donating her advance to Greenpeace.

Ransom My Heart

I gotta say this was not what I expected to be but also I just didn't have any expectation but boy did I have fun. 

the main characters are so lovable and so funny with the crazy ways they handle themselves. Finnula is my spirit animal. Hugo was basically the beast of beauty and beast, but also the beauty, how u wonder? idk I just know that's how he was.

all the secondary characters were so well rounded that I can't believe I can distinguish the 5 sisters of Finnula, tho don't ask me their names 😅

I gotta say this was not what I expected to be but also I just didn't have any expectation but boy did I have fun. 

the main characters are so lovable and so funny with the crazy ways they handle themselves. Finnula is my spirit animal. Hugo was basically the beast of beauty and beast, but also the beauty, how u wonder? idk I just know that's how he was.

all the secondary characters were so well rounded that I can't believe I can distinguish the 5 sisters of Finnula, tho don't ask me their names 😅

overall this was a delight to read.

Winona 

When I was thirteen years old, having just finished the last of the Princess Diaries books (at the time), my school friend, Ausra, lent me the Princess of Genovia’s very own  Ransom My Heart . We were studying at a small all-girls, Anglican secondary school in a quieter part of London where nothing much exciting ever happened. As she placed the book into my hands - it’s cover a red headed woman whose lips and bosom were its focus - she promised me I was in for a ride. For within the pages of Mia Thermapolsis’s debut novel there was an excellent romance and the promise of (gasp!)  smut . 

Unfortunately, I was just shy of the 100th page of the book before my mother confiscated it from me. You see, my mother is a former librarian. From the moment she saw the book in my hands she judged it unfit reading material for a thirteen year old girl who spent most of her time at home. I was walked up to Ausra the next day and forced to return the book, sadly unfinished, under my mother’s watchful eye. 

But the memories of what morsel of steamy content I  did  manage to read stayed with me for years. And now, eleven years later, I have been able to finish  Ransom My Heart without having to fear being reprimanded by my mother. 

You know what? Maybe I was better off not having finished the book at all because it is a major disappointment. 

It started off well, even though the premise for the kidnapping is a bit slapstick and Finnula is a bit too much of a “not-like-other-girls” girl, but I could look past that. She at least had a personality that went beyond being a rebel, and was entertaining at the beginning. In fact, all of the Crais sisters have pretty entertaining personalities (especially Patricia) but we get so little of them it doesn’t matter all too much. But all of the Fair Finn’s personality seems to meander and eventually disappear the more she gets dicked down by the male lead, Hugo. 

To put it bluntly, I don’t like Hugo. Look, I get it, he’s written within a medieval context. But this is fiction. Really silly fiction that’s not even trying to be authentic. Finnula herself is anachronistic character. Why did Hugo have to be a stereotypical chauvinist? The only thing he thinks about is sex. Even when he claims to love Finn, the terms in which he thinks and speaks of her are deeply objectifying. Its as if she’s some shrew that he needs to take and dominate (mostly sexually) and Finn’s shallow resistance to Hugo is what informs his love for her. This is a romance novel, but I can’t root for the romance because I simply do not like the “hero”. He’s just gross. 

Also, the sex is just so boring. There are about four sex scenes and a couple more sexual incidences before and after them, but they’re so bland. I was ready to be scandalised and read some good smut, but all I got was less than a page of description of the sex scenes. They weren’t even explicit except for the word “penis” being mentioned once, so I don’t know what all the fuss was about lol. It was dry as hell. 

Finally, the book was just way too long. It really should have ended after the wedding. The whole 100 pages of who-dunnit mystery was so poorly written and laughably bad. Anyone could see from a mile away how it would unfold. The only purpose it served was to get the leads to say that they loved each other. I really loathe that kind of contrived drama. 

Before I end, the weird Orientalist comments about the Holy Land and Egypt were not missed on me. Romance books have got to stop with their casual racism. It’s just so fucking annoying. 

One star for the Sheriff not being a total bumbling fool, I guess. 

Maybe mum was right to confiscate this book the first time. ‘Twas trash.

Bessie Small

I absolutely loved this book. It was very funny and witty. The only complaint for me was that there were too many love scenes. It literally had loves scenes one after another and there was SO MUCH detail that at times i was uncomfortable.

Ransom My Heart

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