Tahereh Mafi

Fan favorite character Kenji Kishimoto narrates this gripping companion novella to Tahereh Mafi’s New York Times bestselling Shatter Me series, set during the explosive events in Restore Me! Juliette is still reeling from Warner's betrayal, and Kenji is trying to balance his friendship with her with his responsibilities as a leader of the resistance against the Reestablishment. Things get even more interesting when an unexpected person from Omega Point’s past surfaces. The ending of Restore Me left readers gasping, and this novella full of Kenji’s signature sass and big heart is the perfect story to tide fans over until Defy Me, the shocking fifth book in the Shatter Me series.

Shadow Me

tinica

All at once, her smile faded. Her voice was soft, a little concerned when she said, “Hey, are you okay?” 

She was too close. She was too close and my body was definitely overreacting to her and I didn’t know how to cool off. Shut down. 

And then she touched my arm. She touched my arm and then seemed surprised she’d done it, just stared at her hand on my bicep and I forced myself to remain still, forced myself not to move a muscle as her fingertips grazed my skin and a wave of pleasure flooded my body so fast I felt suddenly drunk. 

She dropped her hand and looked away. Looked back at me. 

“Shit,” I said softly. “I think I might be in love with you.”

And then I think she asked me another question, but I’d gone suddenly deaf. I’d lost my head. She was talking to me about the country my parents were born in—a place that really means something to me—and I couldn’t even concentrate.

hes so in love with her, god please let them be together.

“Are you just pretending to be dumb all the time? Or do you always talk like you’re drunk?” 

I froze. Pain and confusion swirled in my head. Pain from the insult, and confusion from— 

“What?” I said again. “I don’t talk like I’m drunk.” 

“You’re looking at me like you’re drunk.” 

Maybe it sounds weird to say, but I know I could love the shit out of someone. I feel it, in my heart. This capacity to love. To be romantic and passionate. Like it’s a superpower I have. A gift, even. 

I’ve developed a sudden headache. Somehow, I’ve become a magnet for pain. Other people’s pain. My own pain. The thing is, I have no one to blame but myself.

“If you’d been up at three, you would’ve had time for all that and more.” 

“Three in the morning?” I gape at him. “Are you out of your mind?” 

And when he says, without a hint of irony— 

taci

So much drama in one day I can hardly keep it all straight. Apparently Juliette has a long-lost sister. Apparently Warner tortured Juliette's sister. Warner and Juliette broke up. Juliette ran off screaming. Warner had a panic attack. Warner's ex-girlfriend showed up. His ex- girlfriend slapped him. Juliette got drunk. No, wait-J got drunk and she shaved her head. And then I saw Juliette in her underwear-an image I'm still trying to erase from my mind

angie

Maybe it sounds weird to say, but I know I could love the shit out of someone. I feel it, in my heart. The capacity to love. To be romantic and passionate. Like it’s a superpower I have. A gift, even.

okay but i absolutely adore kenji & warners dynamic 

Lauren McGrail

“Warner smiles. It’s the first real emotion he’s shown all morning. “I suspected she might eviscerate you,” he says. “But I admit I thought she would use a knife.”

Sophia

Their relationship makes sense. Suddenly everything she's ever said to me about him makes sense. I still don't think I understand Warner, but it's obvious that something about her lights a fire in him. He looks alive when she's in his arms. Human like I've never seen him before.

And not only in love, but beyond salvation.

"No," I say. "I don't eat like an animal. I just happen to be hungry. And maybe you should spend a few years starving to death before you think about making fun of the way I eat, okay asshole?"

It's startling, how quickly it happens, but something changes in Warner's face. Not the tightness in his jaw or the furrow in his brow. But for a moment, the light goes out of his eyes.

I have a roof over my head and clothes on my back and food waiting for me every morning. I have friends. A makeshift family. I'm lonely but I'm not alone. My body works, my brain works, I'm alive.

I have to make a conscious effort to remember that. To choose to be happy every day.

If I didn't, I think my own pain would've killed me a long time ago.

fc ♡

"Who’s Nouria?” I look up to see Haider studying me curiously.

“Castle received an urgent message from his cat?” “I didn’t know he had a cat,” Haider says, his brows furrowing.  “I haven’t seen any animals on base. Are you allowed to keep animals as pets in Sector 45?”

 “Nah. But don’t worry, it’s an invisible cat.”

 Nazeera tries and fails to force back a laugh. She coughs, hard. 

Haider looks at her, confused, and I watch for the moment he realizes I’ve been screwing with him. And then— He glares at me. “Hemar.” 

 “He just called you an ass,” Nazeera explains. 

 “Hatha shlon damaghsiz,” Haider says to his sister. “Let’s go.” 

“Okay—wait—that sounded like it might be a compliment.” 

“Nope.” Nazeera smiles wider. “He just said you’re an idiot.”

 “Cool. Well, I’m glad to be learning all these important words in Arabic.” 

Haider shakes his head, outraged. “This was not meant to be a lesson.”

 I stare at him for a moment, genuinely baffled. “Your brother has no sense of humor, huh?” I say to Nazeera. 

“He’s not good with subtlety,” she says, still smiling at me. “You have to knock him over the head with a joke or he doesn’t get it.” 

I place a hand over my heart. “Wow, I’m so sorry. That must be so difficult for you.” She laughs but quickly bites her lip to kill the sound. And she sounds serious when she says, “You have no idea.” 

Haider frowns. “What are you talking about?” 

“You see what I mean?” she says. I laugh, staring into her eyes for just a second too long. 

Haider shoots me a murderous look. I take that as my cue to leave.

I was terrified, unconsciously flickering in and out of invisibility. But instead of yelling at me, he sat down next to me and asked me about my family; I’d only ever told him that they were dead. He wanted to know now if I’d tell him what happened. I shook my head repeatedly. I wasn’t ready to talk. I didn’t think I’d ever be ready to talk. He didn’t get angry. He didn’t even seem to mind that I’d ransacked his personal belongings. Instead, he picked up the photo album in my lap and told me about his own family. It was the first time I’d ever seen him cry.

I still don’t think I understand Warner, but it’s obvious that something about her lights a fire in him. He looks alive when she’s in his arms. Human like I’ve never seen him before. Like he’s in love. And not only in love, but beyond salvation. When they break apart they both look a little crazy, but Warner looks especially unhinged. His body is shaking. And when she suddenly takes off running down the hall, I know this won’t end well. My heart aches. For both of them. I watch as Warner slumps back, against the wall, sinking into the stone until his limbs give out. He collapses onto the floor.

“Oh,” Castle says, his eyes wide. “Oh, was it a secret? I didn’t realize it was a secret. My apologies.”

He laughs. “I have to say, if you’re interested in keeping it to yourself, you might want to change your tactics.”

He shrugs. “You don’t see yourself around her. Your feelings are obvious to everyone. From anywhere.”

 I drop my head into my hands with a groan.

Warner steps inside, closes the door behind them. “Why do you insist on eating like an animal?” he snaps at me.

 I frown, begin to speak, and he cuts me off with one hand. “Don’t you dare speak to me with your mouth full.”

 I swallow too quickly and nearly choke, but I force the rest of the muffin down.

 I clear my throat before saying, “You know what? I’m tired of this shit. You always make fun of the way I eat, and it’s not fair.” Warner tries to speak and I cut him off. “No,” I say. “I don’t eat like an animal. I just happen to be hungry. And maybe you should spend a few years starving to death before you think about making fun of the way I eat, okay asshole?”

 It’s startling, how quickly it happens, but something changes in Warner’s face. Not the tightness in his jaw or the furrow in his brow. But for a moment, the light goes out of his eyes. He turns almost exactly forty-five degrees away from me. And his voice is solemn when he says, “They’re waiting for us in the next room.” 

Warner walks to the door and then hesitates. Slowly, he turns to face me. “You’re having trouble again.” I look up, surprised. 

 “In love. You’re having trouble in your love life. Is that why you were late?”

 I feel the blood drain from my face. “How the hell would you know something like that?” 

“You reek of it.” He nods at me, my body. “You’re practically emanating lovelorn agony.”

 I stare at him, stunned. I don’t even know if it’s worth denying. 

“It’s Nazeera, isn’t it?” Warner says. His eyes are clear, free of judgment.

“Does she return your affections?” I shoot him a belligerent look. 

“How the hell am I supposed to know?” 

Warner smiles. It’s the first real emotion he’s shown all morning. “I suspected she might eviscerate you,” he says. “But I admit I thought she would use a knife.” 

“Be careful, Kishimoto. I find it necessary to remind you that she was raised to be lethal. I wouldn’t cross her.” 

“Great,” I mutter, dropping my head in my hands. “I feel so good about this. Thanks for the pep talk.”

"Wait a second.” I frown. “Did you just give me dating advice?” 

Warner tilts his head. A flicker of a smile again. “I’m merely returning the favor.”

 I laugh, surprised. “Thanks, man. I appreciate that.” 

He nods. And then, with an elegant pivot, he opens the door and closes it behind him. The dude moves like a prince. He’s always dressed like a prince. Shiny boots and fitted suits and shit. I sigh, irrationally irritated. Am I jealous? Damn, maybe I’m jealous. Warner always seems so pulled together. He’s always cold and cool. Always has a line, a comeback. A clear head. I bet he’s never struggled like I have with a girl. Never had to work so hard t— Wow. I’m an idiot.

Warner is definitely pissed. I’m super late, and Warner is waiting for me, perched carefully on a stiff chair in a conference room downstairs, staring at a wall. I managed to snag a muffin on my way down, and I wipe quickly at my face, hoping I haven’t left evidence around my mouth. I don’t know how Warner feels about muffins, but I’m guessing he’s not a fan. 

“Hey,” I say, and I sound out of breath. “What’d I miss?” 

“This is my fault,” he says, waving a hand around the room. He doesn’t even look at me.

 “I mean, I already know it’s your fault,” I say quickly, “but, like, just to be clear—what are we talking about?”

 “This,” he says. Finally, he looks at me. “This situation.”

“It’s my fault,” he says, pausing dramatically, “for thinking I could depend on you.” 

“All right, all right, calm down. I’m here now.” 

 I glance back, distracted, and in those two seconds I lose sight of where I’m going and slam into someone. Someone. Words fly out of my head. Just like that. Gone. I’m an idiot.

“You’re wet,” Nazeera says, wrinkling her nose as she jumps backward. “Why are you—” And then I watch her, watch as she looks down. Looks up. Scans my body, slowly. I watch her look away and clear her throat, and suddenly she can’t meet my eyes. Hope blooms in my chest. Unlocks my tongue.

 “Hey.” She nods. Crosses her arms. “Good morning.”

“Me? No.” I fight back a smile. It’s strange to see her flustered. 

“Then what are you doing here?” She’s squinting at something behind me. “Do you—um, do you always walk around without a shirt on?” 

I raise my eyebrows. “Up here? Yeah. Pretty much all the time.” 

She nods again. “I’ll remember that.” When I say nothing, she finally meets my eyes. 

She’s still looking at me. She’s still looking at me and it’s causing my chest to constrict. I take a step forward almost without realizing it. Wondering, just wondering. I don’t know what she’s thinking. I don’t know if I managed to screw everything up last night. But for some reason, right now— She’s staring at my mouth. Her eyes move up, meet mine, and then she’s staring at my mouth again. I wonder if she knows she’s doing it. I wonder if she has any idea what she’s doing to me. My lungs feel too small. My heart feels both fast and absurdly heavy. When Nazeera meets my eyes again she takes a sudden, sharp breath. We’re so close I can feel her exhalation against my bare chest and I’m overwhelmed by a disorienting need to kiss her. I want to pull her into my arms and kiss her, and for a moment I actually think she might let me. Just the thought of it sends a thrill up my spine, a dizzying feeling that inspires my mind to jump too far, too fast. I can picture it with terrifying clarity—the fantasy of having her in my arms her eyes dark and heavy with desire. I can imagine her under me, her fingers digging into my shoulder blades as she screams— 

 I force myself to turn away. I almost slap myself in the face. I’m not this guy. I’m not some fifteen-year-old boy who can’t keep his pants on. I’m not. “I, uh, I have to get dressed,” I say, and even I can hear the unsteadiness in my voice. “I’ll see you downstairs.” But then Nazeera’s hand is on my arm again, and my body stiffens, like I’m trying to contain something beyond myself. It’s wild. Desire like I’ve never known it before. I try to remind myself that that’s all this is, that it’s like what J said—I don’t even know this girl. I’m just going through something. I don’t know what, or why, but I’m just, like, clearly infatuated. I don’t even know her.

I couldn’t even concentrate. She touched her mouth a lot. Ran her finger along the edge of her bottom lip a lot. She had a habit of tapping, often, at the diamond piercing there, and I’m not sure she was even aware she was doing it. But it was almost like she was telling me—directing me—to look at her mouth. I couldn’t help it. I was thinking about kissing her. I was thinking about a lot of things. Pinning her to the wall. Undressing her slowly. Running my hands down her naked body. 

“Kenji?” And then she touched my arm. She touched my arm and then seemed surprised she’d done it, just stared at her hand on my bicep and I forced myself to remain still, forced myself not to move a muscle as her fingertips grazed my skin and a wave of pleasure flooded my body so fast I felt suddenly drunk. She dropped her hand and looked away. Looked back at me. She looked confused. 

“Shit,” I said softly. “I think I might be in love with you.” 

 I couldn’t believe I’d been betrayed by my own goddamn mouth like that.

Nazeera stared at me, stunned and still processing, and somehow—through nothing short of a miracle—I managed to recover. 

I laughed. Laughed. And then I said, with perfect nonchalance, “I’m joking, obviously. I think I’m just exhausted. Anyway, good night.” I managed to walk, not run, back to my room, and was able to hold on to what was left of my dignity. I hope. Then again, who the hell knows.

That’s when she laughed for real. Out loud. She bit her lip to cut the sound and she shook her head as she said, softly, “You’re not messing with me, are you? You’re just really bad at this.”

 I blinked at her. I didn’t think I understood the question.

 “You’re terrible at talking to me,” she said. “I make you nervous.” I blanched. 

“I didn’t— I mean, I wouldn’t say that y—”

I’m so happy for my friends. I love them, even when they piss me off. I care about them. I want their joy. But it still hurts a little when it feels like, everywhere I look, everyone seems to have someone. Everyone but me. It’s crazy how much I wish I didn’t care. I wish, so much, all the time, that I didn’t give a shit about this sort of thing

Todavía sigo en shock por restore me 😵‍💫

elinabel hidalgo 

ang 

kenji and nazeera won as the best couple in a dystopian media in my 2024 book awards!!!

EEEEEEKKKK a novella with kenji’s pov like yesssssss been waiting or this one, it just makes you understand him a bit better 

micki

Fireless

Ellie M.

4.75 ⭐️. A NOVELLA IN KENJI’S POV??? BRO That was so unexpected it literally caught me off-guard LMFAO I’ve always wanted Kenji’s POV for so long that I seriously didn’t give two fucks about how this was just a rehash of the events in Restore Me because this also talked about Kenji’s past, his trauma, his feelings for Nazeera and that TENSION GOOD GOD, his secrets, his friendship with Aaron and love for Juliette, and just soo everything that made him Kenji. <3

Bro they better tell me what’s going on like right now the end of the last chapter…what was that how is that possible 

Pia 

Loved reading from Kenji's pov and getting to know him a little better. Very interested to see how these plotlines are going to tie together in the next book. Who is heck is Nouria??

Maggie Hotmer

Renata

love kenji sm i really hope he ends up with nazeera

Raven K

KENJI MY BABY NOO HE DESERVES EVERYTHING OMFG

Kat 

4.25 stars

KENJI MY BABY NOO HE DESERVES EVERYTHING OMFG

Kenji's pov is probably my favorite so far! His humor emanates from the book despite the craziness of the plot and I love it!!

Rosie Sawrey

I really enjoyed seeing Kenji’s perspective as he is one of my favourite characters. 

Olivia 

Kenji is my favorite character. That is all. 

🌞Laur🌞

Meghan Thompson 

Sajha

** spoiler alert **
           Kenji Kishimoto's POV is something I needed.
It ignited some sorta fire in me cuz I relate to him.
Since I am an INFJ myself uh idk why Kenji gives me INFJ vibes.
I just pray he gets a girl that will live him as much as he's capable of loving someone.
Or more.
I know when Kenji loves, he's gonna love hard. Not like he's not in love with Nazeera rn lmfao I can't wait to see more of them.

<3

Cherryreads

linhie

4/5 ☆
I LOVE KENJI SM AND OHMYGOSH WHAT JUST HAPPENED.

celene

i love youUuUuuUu kenji kishimoto :((( my nazenji heart is quaking :((( aaaaaaAaaaaAaAaaaaaaah?!

Elena

Kenji obsessing over Nazeera is the best thing ever that’s all I have to say.

Shadow Me

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