Name: Sissy
ISBN: 9780735218840

Jacob Tobia

Through revisiting their childhood and calling out the stereotypes that each of us have faced, Jacob Tobia invites us to rethink what we know about gender and offers a blueprint for a world free from gender-based trauma. Sissy takes you on a gender odyssey you won't soon forget. Writing with the fierce honesty, wildly irreverent humour, and wrenching vulnerability that have made them a media sensation, Jacob shatters the long-held notion that people are easily sortable into men and women and guarantees that you'll never think about gender - both other people's and your own - the same way again.

A Coming-Of-Gender Story

Sissy

A heart-wrenching, eye-opening, and giggle-inducing memoir about what it's like to grow up not sure if you're (a) a boy, (b) a girl, (c) something in between, or (d) all of the above. "When the political reality facing this country seems dark, we need shinier, sparklier thinkers in the public eye. With a signature style matched only by their wit, Jacob fits that bill perfectly." --Alan Cumming From the moment a doctor in Raleigh, North Carolina, put "male" on Jacob Tobia's birth certificate, everything went wrong. Alongside "male" came many other, far less neutral words: words that carried expectations about who Jacob was and who Jacob should be, words like "masculine" and "aggressive" and "cargo shorts" and "SPORTS!" Naturally sensitive, playful, creative, and glitter-obsessed, as a child Jacob was given the label "sissy." In the two decades that followed, "sissy" joined forces with "gay," "trans," "nonbinary," and "too-queer-to-function" to become a source of pride and, today, a rallying cry for a much-needed gender revolution. Through revisiting their childhood and calling out the stereotypes that each of us have faced, Jacob invites us to rethink what we know about gender and offers a bold blueprint for a healed world--one free from gender-based trauma and bursting with trans-inclusive feminism. From Jacob's Methodist childhood and the hallowed halls of Duke University to the portrait-laden parlors of the White House, Sissy takes you on a gender odyssey you won't soon forget. Writing with the fierce honesty, wildly irreverent humor, and wrenching vulnerability that have made them a media sensation, Jacob shatters the long-held notion that people are easily sortable into "men" and "women." Sissy guarantees that you'll never think about gender--both other people's people's and your own--the same way again.

A Coming-of-Gender Story

I don’t like judging how people tell their own stories so most memoirs will get 5 stars from me but my feelings on this one are a bit mixed. 

I think other critique says it better than I can as this was a privileged perspective and at times a bit hard to relate to, and I do not mean the non-binary or trans aspect at all (that was actually what I could understand and appreciate the most and felt was presented in such a universal way). Also I felt there was an overuse of metaphors and similes when I think sometimes a story can be just as powerful when written plainly. 

Overall, I do recommend this and I did enjoy the format of listening via audio. Just some nuance I agreed with in other reviews.

Abigail

I don’t like judging how people tell their own stories so most memoirs will get 5 stars from me but my feelings on this one are a bit mixed. 

I think other critique says it better than I can as this was a privileged perspective and at times a bit hard to relate to, and I do not mean the non-binary or trans aspect at all (that was actually what I could understand and appreciate the most and felt was presented in such a universal way). Also I felt there was an overuse of metaphors and similes when I think sometimes a story can be just as powerful when written plainly. 

Overall, I do recommend this and I did enjoy the format of listening via audio. Just some nuance I agreed with in other reviews.

THE NATIONAL BESTSELLER "Transformative ... If Tobia aspires to the ranks of comic memoirists like David Sedaris and Mindy Kaling, Sissy succeeds." --The New York Times Book Review A heart-wrenching, eye-opening, and giggle-inducing memoir about what it's like to grow up not sure if you're (a) a boy, (b) a girl, (c) something in between, or (d) all of the above. "A beautiful book . . . honest and funny."--Trevor Noah, The Daily Show "Sensational."--Tyler Oakley "Jacob Tobia is a force." --Good Morning America "A trans Nora Ephron . . . both honest and didactic." --OUT Magazine "A rallying cry for anyone who's ever felt like they don't belong." --Woman's Day As a young child in North Carolina, Jacob Tobia wasn't the wrong gender, they just had too much of the stuff. Barbies? Yes. Playing with bugs? Absolutely. Getting muddy? Please. Princess dresses? You betcha. Jacob wanted it all, but because they were "a boy," they were told they could only have the masculine half. Acting feminine labelled them "a sissy" and brought social isolation. It took Jacob years to discover that being "a sissy" isn't something to be ashamed of. It's a source of pride. Following Jacob through bullying and beauty contests, from Duke University to the United Nations to the podiums of the Methodist church--not to mention the parlors of the White House--this unforgettable memoir contains multitudes. A deeply personal story of trauma and healing, a powerful reflection on gender and self-acceptance, and a hilarious guidebook for wearing tacky clip-on earrings in today's world, Sissy guarantees you'll never think about gender--both other people's and your own--the same way again.

Vivian

I plan to read a series of LGBTQ+ books for the pride month with this book being the first one. 

I really enjoyed the first half talking about their childhood and adolescence. It showed me their inner struggles/conflicts growing up as a gender nonconforming person, something I was fairly ignorant about. The writing was fluid and humorous. And I liked how confident and self-assured they sounded.

The 2nd half of the book made me start to feel Jacob is perhaps a bit too full of themselves (as evidenced by this memoir being written at the ripe old age of 27). And the series of very impressive accomplishments they bragged about (that reek of white(white passing)/class privilege) got old fast and I doubt an average queer person (let alone a queer person of color) could relate to. 

I appreciate them raising awareness and being an activist on gender unconformity; however it was really difficult for me to emphasize with their supposedly “traumatic/oppressive” experience. A few incidents they mentioned pale in comparison to the average discrimination a non-white person in the US could be exposed to. I was also disappointed that Jacob didn’t touch upon the queer community’s struggles in general, especially the ones less privileged than themselves. As a book aimed to raise awareness, that seemed pretty tone deaf to me and thus reaffirmed my “too self centered” judgment.

The part that totally lost me was when Jacob complained about them losing Rhodes Fellowship and not elected to Board of Trustees at Duke (mind you, both are extremely competitive) due to being queer, I wonder if it came across their mind that their many achievements (got into Havard, famous LGBT activist at Duke, invited to White House, interviewed on national TV, etc.) were made possible exactly because of their gender identity. 

With that said, I’ll be curious about Jacob’s future endeavors and do hope they shine as the most badass queen. Will be looking forward to their future books (with more wisdom and humility that comes with time hopefully).

Les Reynolds

I have complicated feelings about this book. Overall I’m glad to have read it, and it offers useful perspective.

Caitlin Berger

What a beautiful and necessary book to read! I loved every page and am so grateful that Jacob wrote this book.

Sissy A Coming-Of-Gender Story

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