Tahereh Mafi

shatter me #1

Jessica

Maria 

»I spent my life folded between the pages of books. In the absence of human relationships I formed bonds with paper characters. I lived love and loss through stories threaded in history; I experienced adolescence by association.«

Aimee :)

His eyes scan my silhouette and the slow motion makes my heart race. I catch the rose petals as they fall from my cheeks, as they float around my body, as they cover me in something that feels like the absence of courage.

Stop looking at me, is what I want to say.

Stop touching me with your eyes and keep your hands to your sides and please and please and please-

I've been screaming for years and no one has ever heard me.

I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶. I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶. I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶. I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶. I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶.I̶ a̶m̶ n̶o̶t̶ i̶n̶s̶a̶n̶e̶. I am not insane.

His lips soften into a smile. He repeats my name like the word amuses him. Entertains him. Delights him.

I̶n̶ 1̶7̶ y̶e̶a̶r̶s̶ n̶o̶ o̶n̶e̶ h̶a̶s̶ s̶a̶i̶d̶ m̶y̶ n̶a̶m̶e̶ l̶i̶k̶e̶ t̶h̶a̶t̶.

It never leaves. It's always there, watching, steadfast, knowing us in our light and dark moments, changing forever just as we do. Every day it's a different version of itself. Sometimes weak and wan, sometimes strong and full of light. The moon understands what it means to be human.

Uncertain. Alone. Cratered by imperfections.

I clench my jaw, not trusting myself to speak.

He raises his eyebrows. "At least I'm honest about being a liar."

The wind folds itself into my arms and smiles against my skin. Cool, silky-smooth air braids a soft breeze through my hair. This square courtyard could be my ballroom.

shatter me #1 quotes

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