Ian Wood

Macbeth from Ian Wood A novella in horrendous acts Macbeth was Shakespeare's shortest tragedy for a reason! It was appalling! Not only is it historically about as inaccurate as you can get (Macbeth was a real Scots king, but he defeated Duncan in battle, not by murder, and then he ruled for almost two decades before he was also killed in battle), it's also very poorly done. From the insane author of: Asshat's Fables Baker Street Bar Trek Dire Virgins Dune With the Wind It's a Wonderful Lie! Merde on the Prurient Express Misadventures Mindgame Raw Stars Thoracic Pearl Fallen Condom Urinals

Macdeath

Once again Louise and Thelma, escapees from Rattusky LaboRATories, are on the loose, and this time they're learning about Christmas. What is it all about? The Winter Solstice! The waning and waxing of the daylight as the sun appears to move south and then back north in our sky. The Little Rattuses learn about traditions ancient and new from all over the world. And manage to find a few snacks on the way. They're all about eating healthy vegetables and learning secrets. But can they answer the biggest question of all? Is there such a thing as Santa Rattus?

The Very Christmassy Rattuses

This book covers how, when and where to enjoy some of nature's most thrilling experiences

How to Have the World's Best Wildlife Encounters

Swimming with Dolphins, Tracking Gorillas

When the author created this fantasy world, he had no idea that fairy magic could make it real... or that he'd no longer be in control. Author Lewis Liddell had run into problems with his Demonrayne fantasy series with each new volume selling worse than its predecessor. His editor was on his case to rewrite volume four when, in a redux of what had triggered him to write that original series, he had another dream, this time about a fantasy world that was radically different from anything other authors were doing. His editor was negative on starting something new before he'd finished volume four, but he felt a powerful muse to continue down this path. The last thing he expected was for a fairy named Fae Rae to disappear from his story and appear in his study right as he was concluding a chapter. And for her to take charge. He'd never confused his fictional life with the real one. Now they were both the same. Set in the same universe as Fairy Tale, Bad Fairy, Spelter Skelter, Powers That Be, and She-Male, this story continues to build worlds of magical wonder.

Fifty Shades of Fae

Damien Kempf

Jinty Nelson

For earlier medieval Christians, the Bible was the book of guidance above all others, and the route to religious knowledge, used for all kinds of practical purposes, from divination to models of government in kingdom or household. This book's focus is on how medieval people accessed Scripture by reading, but also by hearing and memorizing sound-bites from the liturgy, chants and hymns, or sermons explicating Scripture in various vernaculars. Time, place and social class determined access to these varied forms of Scripture. Throughout the earlier medieval period, the Psalms attracted most readers and searchers for meanings. This book's contributors probe readers' motivations, intellectual resources and religious concerns. They ask for whom the readers wrote, where they expected their readers to be located and in what institutional, social and political environments they belonged; why writers chose to write about, or draw on, certain parts of the Bible rather than others, and what real-life contexts or conjunctures inspired them; why the Old Testament so often loomed so large, and how its law-books, its histories, its prophetic books and its poetry were made intelligible to readers, hearers and memorizers. This book's contributors, in raising so many questions, do justice to both uniqueness and diversity.

Reading the Bible in the Middle Ages

The Early Middle Ages, which marked the end of the Roman Empire and the creation of the kingdoms of Western Europe, was a period central to the formation of modern Europe. This period has often been drawn into a series of discourses that are more concerned with the eighteenth, nineteenth, and twentieth centuries than with the distant past. In The Modern Origins of the Early Middle Ages, Ian Wood explores how Western Europeans have looked back to the Middle Ages to discover their origins and the origins of their society. Using historical records and writings about the Fall of Rome and the Early Middle Ages, Wood reveals how these influenced modern Europe and the way in which the continent thought about itself. He asks, and answers, the important question: why is early-medieval history, or indeed any pre-modern history, important? This volume promises to add to the debate on the significance of medieval history in the modern world.

The Modern Origins of the Early Middle Ages

When Tigo Garcia's new navigation app starts behaving oddly in his freshly-serviced car, he has to wonder where it's taking him. He doesn't know that eventually it will lead him to the love of his life: a man he's long admired, but never for a minute imagined he would end up with after his less than stellar experience with relationships. Fortunately, there's an app for that! Auto Mate is a gay romance novella, sans the smut.

Auto Mate

Anne Williams

An Examination Preparation Course. Updated for the Revised Exam.

PASS Cambridge BEC Preliminary. Teacher's Book.

When high-schooler Colleen Gael walks through the fronds of a willow tree, she doesn't expect to end up in Talamhsióga, home of fairies, fauns, gnomes, lupracans, pixies, selkies, trills, urisks, and others. Nor does she expect herself to be caught up in a war that's been brewing between the Orkestrels and the tyrant King Stephen. None of these people are what Colleen expected from reading fantasy stories. They're alien folks who are hard to tell apart and it's even harder to divine their motives. All Colleen wants to do is get back home and when a fairy named Hexandria seems to befriend her, she thinks she might find her path, but Hexandria has an entirely different plan for Colleen. There's no handsome prince to save her here. Can Colleen's active imagination, her sense of humor, and her good nature undermine the evil that's been spreading for decades in Talamhsióga? Or will she be trapped forever, another victim of intolerance and paranoia?

Fairy Tale

Episode Lightnine: The Parody Awakens Set far too many years after Burn of the Deadeye, this stunningly bad, action-strapped adventure ships us back to the same tired world of Incest Playa Orgasma, Ham Salad, Mattie the Nookie, Seized Throw-Up, UFVD2?, Lute Litesabre, and trappist Monk Admiral Ack-Ack, while introducing us to a whole host (because half a host is just a ho) of exciting new characters, including Stray, who is having a ball with OCD the new druid, Flipper the Scorn Trup, Captain Plasma Rifle, and Hilo Mudi, son of Salad, leader of the Knights Who Say "Re", and who works for his boss Tokémon, this trilogy's flavor for overlord. Darpa Caper may have been redeemed at your local World-mart for purchase price since he fell apart, but even when the entire evil empire has been totally trashed, it can still rise from the trashes and launch a brand new fleet and a massive army in only two decades, without anybody noticing, let alone caring. Is it too late to stop yet another mortal disaster (from the Latin for 'Death Star') taking place in less than a trilogy? Yes! From the insane author of: Asshat's Fables Baker Street Bar Trek Dire Virgins Dune With the Wind It's a Wonderful Lie! Macdeath Merde on the Prurient Express Misadventures Mindgame Thoracic Pearl Fallen Condom Urinals

Raw Stars

When Zayn Stone, a budding author having some success with his work, is invited by his two closest friends, married swingers Donna and Chris, to take a trip to Hawaii as a plus one on the superyacht of the millionaire number two in a very successful Chinese robotics corporation, he thinks it will be an interesting experience. He has no idea. Both Chris and Donna have designs on him, and then there's a murder in a locked cabin and a host of suspects. There's the spoiled actress, the MVP basketball player, the reclusive supermodel, the two power-lifting German crew members, and others. Can he even survive the trip, let alone figure out whodunit? The answer will surprise you.

Open Ocean, Closed Coffin

A novella. In space, no-one can hear you preen. When the Astolens realize they had lost the election to continue stewardship of planet Asskiss, they refused to accept the election result and began a campaign of lies to cast doubt on it among the gullible. Then, on the fateful Jansix, they attacked, overturning the rightfully-elected Oftraders, and forcing their own rule. It would come down to the androgyne John, the Great White Savior, and his Sandimen counterpart, the androgyne Chani Zuko, she of the Night Fever, to bring salvation to the universe! From the insane author of: Asshat's Fables Baker Street Bar Trek Dire Virgins It's a Wonderful Lie! Macdeath Merde on the Prurient Express Misadventures Mindgame Raw Stars Thoracic Pearl Fallen Condom Urinals

Dune With the Wind

Was Bailey George the richest man in Bleddry Falls? Or was he merely a puppet, outmaneuvered from the get-go by a woman who had the smarts to take what she wanted from the clinging grasp of an old white man's world? Was she really in competition with Viola Flickerbic, or were they working together towards a common end? You're about to find out! A beloved Christmas movie has gone begging for a parody for far too long. Tonight, it's coming right down the chimney!

It's a Wonderful Lie!

There exist five islands: Key North, Key South, Key East, Key West, and Key Central. Each is home to a feral population of interesting and curious animals. On Key West there live the feral chickens, who are strange and inscrutable creatures living their own lives for secret purposes. This book explores one possible explanation for their activities as reported by those agents of the Chicken Intelligence Agency who actually went in to Key West to investigate! Warning: this book features wild chickens!

Feral Chickens of Key West

Aesop is just another way of saying 'a poser' which is what he was. The words are almost anagrams! He's long been held up as a fount of wisdom, but he should have changed his name to Kyrie Profanis, which is Greek for 'Mr Obvious'. He was apparently a slave, and judged from this effort - assuming he actually did write any of it - he must have suffered terribly if this collection was the result. Æsop had it coming. These fables are over 2,000 years out of date and it shows. It's high time they were updated for the modern world. This mature and deviant collection of inane, humorous, off-the-wall, and downright ridiculous foibles all of which are rooted in his crazed stories, aims to do just that. Don't say you weren't warned.

Asshat's Fables

"[The book's] subject matter is the changing interpretation within Europe of the end of the Roman Empire and the early Middle Ages from the eighteenth century to the present and how individual interpretations influenced and were influenced by the circumstances in which they were written."--Preface.

From the author of: BassMetal Cloud Fighters Femarine When a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such government, and to provide a New Guard for their future security. Romo Tang awoke from her nap suddenly, disturbed by the silence. She was to learn in rapid succession that her friend was dead and military men were coming to get her. An anonymous voice on her private phone was advising her to hide. Zhi Ruo Chen's daughter was such a genetic mess when she was born that she was doomed to die, but Doctor Chen was not about to permit that. She not only fixed her daughter's problems, she enhanced her in every way she could, using whatever genes from whatever species would best serve her. Her mom vanished long ago, and Romo is almost an adult. The only hope she has left is to find the handful of others like her, and join with them to resist the abuses and usurpations planned by the government, with every gene at her disposal. Welcome to the New Guard.

CHiPR

The life of the mango is not well understood. They're very secretive fruits who like to hide away, and even now scientists are still trying to unearth the details of their culture and turn over the leaves of their lives. That's why I'm happy to share with you the details about a hitherto unknown ritual as mangos pass on and their stone heart is buried in the mangroves. No really, it's just another bit of fun, and a smidgeon of information about the nutritional value of the mango. Enjoy!

Manghost!

Bertha Boyd

A Collection of Facts

Bertha, a Writer of Sweet Verse

When she's betrayed by a vengeful ex- during her audition, Ballet prodigy Jandra is seriously injured. Her life seems ruined, but a secretive woman offers to pay for her surgery if she'll give a year of her life to working for the agency. Before she knows it, Jandra is training as an anti-terrorism field officer for an organization that specializes in fitting the talent to the job. Soon, she's assigned to a teaching position at Crystal University as a dance instructor while secretly trying to infiltrate a suspected terrorist cell, with a charming British guy as tech support. She seems to be a natural at her new profession, but it's not long before she discovers that there's no terrorism here: not unless you count rape, which Jandra, who can't forget her sister's tragic history, definitely does. It's not long before she's off the case, but she stays on her toes, fighting a different kind of threat with an implacable commitment and a deadly work ethic. Tutu chez!

Ian Wood

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