Jade Song

Ren Yu is a swimmer. Her daily life starts and ends with the pool. Her teammates are her only friends. Her coach is her guiding light. If she swims well enough, she will be scouted, get a scholarship, go to a good school. Her parents will love her. Her coach will be kind to her. She will have a good life.

But these are human concerns. These are the concerns of those confined to land, those with legs. Ren grew up on stories of creatures of the deep, of the oceans and the rivers. Creatures that called sailors to their doom. That dragged them down and drowned them. That feasted on their flesh. The creature that she’s always longed to become: the mermaid.

Ren aches to be in the water. She dreams of the scent of chlorine, the feel of it on her skin. And she will do anything she can to make a life for herself where she can be free. No matter the pain. No matter what anyone else thinks. No matter how much blood she has to spill. 

A Novel

Chlorine

I dreamt myths larger than my girl body could hold. 

But let me be clear, so you cannot misconstrue my motives: while my journey may seem lonesome, I was never alone in my scars. 

On the day of my first period, I was more dead doe than human woman. Was womanhood always so violent, raw?

My mother’s cooking tasted better than he did. 

I was newly aware my parents were people who carried their burdens on their bodies rather than within themselves--this was my doomed inheritance.

“I guess hearts are slippery because they’re covered in blood. I wish I could mine dry. Then I’d miss you less.” - (Cathy, 5) 

If someone ever said this about me I’d collapse. BUT when she speaks about Cathy…ooooooo…oh.

“I wasn’t attracted to Brad. It was more the attraction I’d have toward a cup of raw broccoli if I was starving.” 

“ But happy ending romances were for girls. And I was not a girl? I was a mermaid.” 

tiff <3

You’ll never learn to be better, not when winning is so addictive. 

Stas

Were you aware when I realized I was in love with you? I keep thinking back to the dawn of my awareness. I try to grasp its rays so I can stay warm, but they fly out of my hands. I have trouble holding on because you're not around to remind me how.

Chlorine quotes

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