Name: p.'s review of Hell Followed with Us by Andrew Joseph White
Item: Hell Followed with Us
Rating: 2
Author: p.

Andrew Joseph White

A furious debut novel from Andrew Joseph White about embracing the monster within and unleashing its power against your oppressors. Perfect for fans of Gideon the Ninth and Annihilation. Sixteen-year-old trans boy Benji is on the run from the cult that raised him--the fundamentalist sect that unleashed Armageddon and decimated the world's population. Desperately, he searches for a place where the cult can't get their hands on him, or more importantly, on the bioweapon they infected him with. But when cornered by monsters born from the destruction, Benji is rescued by a group of teens from the local Acheson LGBTQ+ Center, affectionately known as the ALC. The ALC's leader, Nick, is gorgeous, autistic, and a deadly shot, and he knows Benji's darkest secret: the cult's bioweapon is mutating him into a monster deadly enough to wipe humanity from the earth once and for all. Still, Nick offers Benji shelter among his ragtag group of queer teens, as long as Benji can control the monster and use its power to defend the ALC. Eager to belong, Benji accepts Nick's terms...until he discovers the ALC's mysterious leader has a hidden agenda, and more than a few secrets of his own.

Hell Followed with Us

Cassidy Nolan

This is home. I am alive, these are my friends, this is my 

Seraph - Benji - is terrifying in his beauty, in his brutality. 

 him? That’s the boy who wanted to kiss him, who promised to come home, who made him face the broken fucking thing the Angels had turned them both into?

Nick realizes, horrifically, that he adores that boy with every ounce of himself, in s way that refuses to be packed down and ignored like everything else, and that is why he slams his fist into the stairs to shatter his train of thought. He pulls himself back onto the wall.

If they want me to be a monster one step closer to God, that’s fine.

In what world was their God ever a benevolent one?

The things that made me tell myself I was betrothed and always would be.

It doesn’t matter now, does it? After what Theo did?

again, i know this is set way in the future but 2019 being vintage makes me feel like the crypt keeper

“It’s Brunello,” Cormac says, as if offended that Faith can’t recognize it on sight. “Classic vintage, 2019.”

They’s lost the Vanguard, but Nick hasn’t lost Benji. There is no way in hell Nick could have brought himself to give Benji over. How had he even thought he could? God, what is wrong with him? How could he?

Nick runs back to the bank for exactly the amount of time it takes to grab a pistol, an extra mask, and some bobby pins.

I wish I could stay here forever, surrounded by ash and death and his laughter.

He knows what I’ve been through. He understands.

I press my face into my arm, right where the bandages wind into the crook of my elbow. He called me a monster, and I called him one back. He suffered as an Angel, and I led them to his home to burn everything to the ground.

Wives, remember: The way to a lasting marriage is faith and loyalty. You must have faith in your husband the way you have faith in God. When your husband turns from you, it is your duty to pray, Lord, how can I change?

I want to ask Theo to do it for me. He’d break me open if I asked him to, wouldn’t he? He understands I never asked for this. He won’t hurt me this time.

Nick teaches me how to load and unjam a pistol, and I try to pretend I’m not staring at him more than I’m looking at the gun.

hey nick? i’m gonna cry that’s so mean

“Seraph will be joining the Watch today,” he says. “And it’ll be going to the church.” Erin cringes at the word 

 but they’d had this argument already and agreed to hate the other’s opinion on the topic in silence.

“Morning, Joey,” Nick drones in return. His head is at an angle that could almost be cocky, eyes cold and tired. Even with his mask, there’s an edge to his expression I can’t look away from. I am 

, I remind myself, which has no impact on the fact that I am very gay.

By the time I’m done washing myself, the water is disgusting. I stare at it for too long, because now that all Dad’s blood is gone, I’m realizing I no longer have anything to remember him by.

“What name and pronouns do you want me to use for you?”

I can say whatever I want. And that’s what she’ll call me. No questions asked.

hey? still got some deconstruction to do :(

 His dark eyes, sharp brows, the distant but curious tilt of his head . . .

I dig my thumbnail into my finger, where my engagement ring used to be. I am still betrothed to Theo. I held his hand in front of the church and prayed for the world we were going to build together in Jesus’s name. I promised to bring glory as God’s fiery sword; Theo promised to fight beside me. We were perfect together.

To think like this about anyone else is wrong. No matter what Theo did to me that night.

look i know this is set in the future but this still made me feel old

One of the newspaper clippings is from all the way back in 2015, celebrating the legalization of gay marriage in the United States. I can’t picture 2015. I don’t think Mom and Dad had even met yet.

oh my god karen you can’t just ask people why they’re white

“Wait, no.” I can’t just ask people if they’re trans. “I shouldn’t have . . .”

All of us standing together, perfect strangers on the battlefield, and it’s almost like my prayers have been answered, amen - but I don’t believe it for a second.

You will return to the earth for out of it you were taken; for from dust you were made and to dust you will return.

(Bre)anne✨

The actual ones are a blessing because they are the truth, and as much time as Nick spends lying, the truth is beautiful.

Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord.

My boyhood threatened to destroy me unless I looked it in the eye. I’m not going to let Seraph do that to me too.

Genesis (@whisperingchapters)

I think I just don't just gel well with the super grimdark books, unless they manage to either express an idea very well or have something else to get me really invested in them.

There were a lot of excellent ideas in this but I just did not find them executed very well. "Sorrowland" by Rivers Solomon has very similar themes and plot but is, for example, a much better and more complete execution.

Also this book is a little kneecapped by wanting to get everything right in terms of identity politics. I thought the idea of Benji's transness and his monstrousness was the best part of this novel but the section where pretty much everyone finds a reason to explicitly state the intricacies of their identity which feels like lazy writing when it could have been much better interwined into the plot.

I think I just don't just gel well with the super grimdark books, unless they manage to either express an idea very well or have something else to get me really invested in them.

There were a lot of excellent ideas in this but I just did not find them executed very well. "Sorrowland" by Rivers Solomon has very similar themes and plot but is, for example, a much better and more complete execution.

Also this book is a little kneecapped by wanting to get everything right in terms of identity politics. I thought the idea of Benji's transness and his monstrousness was the best part of this novel but the section where pretty much everyone finds a reason to explicitly state the intricacies of their identity which feels like lazy writing when it could have been much better interwined into the plot.

i’m glad people can connect to it but i personally can’t .. 

envie,

tori 👻

this is HANDS DOWN one of my new favorite books

kelsey

2 months later…. i finally finished it 🙏 

Thank god, thank god, thank god, and Nick hasn’t thanked God for anything in years.

cw: dead naming (on page), misgendering, body horror, gore, transphobia

Laura

** spoiler alert **
           I loved this book. I loved how this story ended with Nick and Benji just lying there. How Nick saw the Beauty in Benji. 
I did feel rage against all transphobic actions which was in this book and I also saw how many things in real life aren't right.

fris🐝

The book is incredibly fascinating with its world building and lore behind it. There is no problem with it, really, I just happened to lose my interest on it over time and it could be because I was not captivated enough to keep going. Understandably, it keeps the readers in the dark until the build-up of climax but I wasn't fond of "not knowing", granted, this could work for another person. The description of violence is outstandingly vivid and I was thrilled to turn the pages to read more of those. On the more steady parts where the characters aren't conflicted or fighting, I was bored. But that's just me and has nothing to do with how the book is. Overall, I liked the idea of the book but it just didn't keep me interested long enough to reach the conclusion.

Floor van Heel 

Jess

the start was slow but it picked up towards the end but took me forever to read like bro lets pick up the pace a little ur losing me :/

This book is so good. And terrifying, and bloody, and gory, but also somehow still full of hope. Even when I couldn’t stop saying “this book is so intense” I also couldn’t stop reading it. 

There is so much going on here. (Lots of content warnings you may want to check out before reading.) Super religious cults, bio-weapons, acceptance and love… how does this story do it all??  

I wish I was better at voicing my thoughts about this story, it took me by surprise how much I loved it, but it will also probably give me nightmares. 

Megan BV

This book is so good. And terrifying, and bloody, and gory, but also somehow still full of hope. Even when I couldn’t stop saying “this book is so intense” I also couldn’t stop reading it. 

There is so much going on here. (Lots of content warnings you may want to check out before reading.) Super religious cults, bio-weapons, acceptance and love… how does this story do it all??  

I wish I was better at voicing my thoughts about this story, it took me by surprise how much I loved it, but it will also probably give me nightmares. 

this was so brutal and gory and queer and i loved it 

sophia

This book. THIS BOOK!!! I got this one recced to me by a friend and they even let me borrow their book so I could read it and not break my book buying ban so I knew it was going to be amazing but I'm completely blown away. This horrifying post-apocalyptic world is brought on by a cult of Christian supremacists who have started the process to turn Benji into a monster that will help them further their murder spree and it's truly terrifying to read their ideals and how they interact with Benji. There are so many layers to this book and something that's really incredible about it is the diversity of the characters: multiple trans characters including the main character, Benji, an autistic character, Nick, who plays a heavy role in the story, and a diverse cast of races and cultures make up the other kids at the Acheson LGBTQ+ Center. This book is horror and gore, but it is also queer rage, vengeance, and showing what happens when teens bite back. An amazing read (and a gorgeous cover!!!) and I'll definitely be reading Andrew Joseph White's next book when it comes out.

Visceral. In every way possible. This book is rage and fury and catharsis wrapped up in a body horror jacket. One of those stories that sticks with you long after you read the end pages. 

Rachel 

I think it was wonderful to read a book about lgbtq+ kids written by someone in the community. I always have a hard time reading about characters within that community, as someone in the community myself, when they are written by others outside the community. It's hard to write about without understanding and sometimes it comes out as a big stereotype and even though I am not trans, reading from someone who is about being trans, in a broken and disastrous world, was so enlightening and so heart wrenching. I 100% would recommend it.

Hope Aaron 

Alex

5 stars all the way. Absolutely no words to describe how this book made me feel, but let me try anyway. 
The book had me in its grip right from the start, it was so hard to put down and while reading the last pages I was so sad realising it was coming to an end. 

The main character, Benji, is so well written. His whole way of talking about his transness speaks to me so much. He felt so real and I felt so seen. As a trans guy raised in a christian town I could relate so much. 

All of the characters are written so well, and all of the characters part of The Watch really make you feel at home with them. 

Also the gore part of this book? Amazing I loved it through and through. The last few chapters were everything I could ask for and they tie up Benji's story perfectly. Amazing book

I LOVED THIS BOOK. So, so well done, especially for a debut novel. While not completely similar, this book did what I had wanted HMRC to do — and wow, wow, wow, this book was so good. Some of the best queer fiction I’ve read in a while, because it simply just allows the characters to be who they are without making it some stark point to be underlined and gasped at. Beautifully done.

TW to be added later

I LOVED THIS BOOK. So, so well done, especially for a debut novel. While not completely similar, this book did what I had wanted HMRC to do — and wow, wow, wow, this book was so good. Some of the best queer fiction I’ve read in a while, because it simply just allows the characters to be who they are without making it some stark point to be underlined and gasped at. Beautifully done.

Carrington Kinslow

This book is one big beautiful mess. In the best possible way. It’s intense as hell, it’s graphic, and it is not kind to its readers. It, quite literally, takes its characters through Hell. But, it also brings them back. 

This has some very graphic body horror, so if that’s not your thing, you should hard pass on this book. But I absolutely loved it. Andrew White has a sick little head, and I want to live in it. The physical descriptions in this book sometimes made me sick to my stomach, like genuinely, downright horrific. This is a phenomenal work of horror, that at times, I even felt like it tested the boundaries of what is considered Young Adult.

I went into this book expecting romance, and yes, it is there, but I discovered that romance is not at all the point of the story. It’s about the spectrum of queerness, it’s about religious trauma, it’s about forgiveness, not just of others, but of yourself, too. It’s packed with beautiful messages told in the most terrifying ways. 

I really loved these characters, and despite how terrible he was, I actually consider Theo to be one of my favorites. There’s just so much nuance there. I like how White doesn’t tell this story in blacks and whites, almost everyone in this story fucks up pretty bad, at times. 

The only criticism I can give is that towards the end, I felt like the physical descriptions became a bit much, and they started to get lost. As Benji shifted more and more into the Seraph, I just started not being able to picture any of it.

I had a lot of fun with this book, I basically devoured it. I can’t wait to see more from this author!

Hell Followed with Us - 4/5 Stars

Latitude Tamarind

Thanks to NetGalley for the eARC.

This is one of the most beautiful and brutal things I’ve ever read. Honestly, if this description of the premise got you interested, you’re going to love the book. It’s everything that it promises and more. Look, I’m from an age where we had three books about Homosexuality and two of them were by David Leviathan and the other was The Geography Club. I am so lucky to live in this time and so lucky that things have changed so much so that Andrew Joseph White could write this book that is suffused with horror and trauma and love. Also there is so much fucking gore in this book. Which I normally don’t read a lot of so it was really Intense to me. Holy fuck I think this is the best book I’ve ever read. Incredibly lived up to its promise.

The main message of this book: They tried to kill us, and they failed. [And we made them suffer.]

Five stars.

Cara

ayah ♡

roan

loved the characters but the plot not so much

Genesis (@whisperingchapters) &
Hell Followed with Us by Andrew Joseph White

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Genesis (@whisperingchapters) &Hell Followed with Us by Andrew Joseph White

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Genesis (@whisperingchapters) &
Hell Followed with Us by Andrew Joseph White