
Reviews

this is a story about language and belonging. i'm very well pleased with its writing, poetic prose but not forced. it doesn't try too much, it just is. there were inconsistent parts, some confusing ones, but overall, it was good. i just missed a bit of flow, tho. it progresses, but a few times, i felt distant of the story. don't get me wrong, i liked it, honestly. it's a 3.5 also, i have to read the fragments by barthes.

It’s been a while since I listened to a fiction book and A Lover’s Discourse has been one of the most engrossing books I’ve listened to or read in a long time. It’s something that I will definitely get a physical copy of at some point and I’d have already gotten one if it wasn’t so expensive. I read a lot of books that I enjoyed a lot this year and A Lover’s Discourse is one of my favorites so far. It’s probably not for everybody, but it’s a five star book for me. A Lover’s Discourse begins with an unnamed narrator telling the story of how she met her husband who she addresses as “you”. From there, the narrator traces their relationship from the beginning through a series of fragments of conversation and vignettes that show their life together. It’s not so much concerned with the how they got together or the early stages of the relationship which for the most part was glossed over. I don’t consider this as a negative and I liked that it focuses more on their relationship becoming more stable and long-term as well as how they dealt with the misunderstandings that may arise. The narrator is a PhD student in visual anthropology from China, while her lover is a Australian-German landscape architect. Their differences in not just culture, but also language is explored in depth in the novel. In fact, their linguistic differences serve to highlight how our languages shape our way of thinking. The use of language to highlight their differences and how it may cause misunderstandings was really well done. However, this couple don’t really have a lot of misunderstandings. They’re both very mature and grounded so when they have disagreements, they converse and work out a solution. I’d say that the story has a melancholic air which might imply that it’s sad, but it’s not. It may actually be due to the narration. In any case, the story has a good ending. It’s not very romantic as both lovers don’t tend to be overly romantic or sentimental. It makes it feel like an adult love story between two professionals who communicate. When there’s something the narrator doesn’t understand, her partner explains it to her. I think that they have a very quiet love story. Originally, I was going to title this review “love in a time of Brexit” but I felt it too flippant. Brexit however is a running theme in this novel. From the narrator’s worries about her status, to her search for belongingness and a home, Brexit continuously lingers in the background. Here, the political reality is very much present throughout the narrative and it’s an important theme. The writing is very poetic and lyrical and I liked how the fragments of conversation and vignettes were presented. It wasn’t just the fragmented discourses between the narrator and her lover, but also between other people that the narrator meets as a PhD student. There’s an air of loneliness once you realize that her lover is the only truly important person to the narrator (at least in the beginning, until they have a child), but it does build the narrative that your home lies with a person. The title is taken from A Lover’s Discourse: Fragments by Roland Barthes and Barthes himself is referenced throughout the novel. The couple talk about Barthes and what they think about this book as well as how his own life story influenced the book. After reading this, I was actually tempted to read Barthes’ book. It’s a very cerebral kind of novel as the story doesn’t just explore the feelings between the two or their differences in the way they think. It also explores their conversations regarding art, literature, culture, and architecture in a way that feels respectful in their differences in opinion while also deepening their connection with each other. In a way, it’s a very intellectual love story. I listened to this book at a time when I was hankering for those kinds of love stories and it fit what I was looking for exactly. Overall, I really loved this book. It’s written in kind of an experimental style which I love but may not be for everyone. If you like love stories which explore relationships as they deepen into something more long-lasting as well as differences brought about by language, you might enjoy this book.

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Highlights

“Whatever I spoke, whether it was my borrowed English language or my native Chinese Mandarin, I didn't feel I had that language in me. That language spoke for me, instead of my speaking it. That language had existed before me and would continue after me. And I just wore it like clothes. Then it would abandon me when I die.”