Bill Bryson

TRAVELS IN EUROPE.

NEITHER HERE NOR THERE

Nimish

I had been delaying reading Bill Bryson for quite a while now. I don't have the faintest, why. So when I saw the inviting cover of 'Neither here, nor there: Travels in Europe (NHNT)' and the index page which had names of cities along with page numbers, I thought to myself - OK this is a good way to get acquainted with Bryson, since it isn't one single journey. Also after having just finished Pico Iyer's 'Video Night in Kathmandu' I was in the mood to read some more longform travel essays rather than travelogues in a book form. 

NHNT is Bryson revisiting 22 cities around Europe, some of which he backpacked through as a 20-something along with his friend Stephen Katz. This book is more personal in nature, rather than completely about the places he has been to. So if you are going to read this as a travel guide to those cities, then you will be disappointed. Of course, Bryson does give insights into each of the places he has been to with a lot of historical context as well for some places. I also liked the parts where he flashbacks to his days with Katz and does a spot comparison between the two eras. 

Set in the 1991, this book takes you from Oslo to Paris to Hamburg to Copenhagen all the way to Austria to Yugoslavia (a country which dissolved in 2006) to Istanbul and many places in between. Bryson's reflections are what makes this book worth reading. Especially his comic analogies - there are many instances in the book when I was laughing out loud. Also this is the pre-Euro era book, so each country had its own currency and you hear a lot about traveller's cheques. 

Most of the book is about him walking about, exploring places he had been to in his 20s and some new parts of the same cities. There aren't any deep conversations with locals form any cities. So that ways it is quite different form Iyer's travel books, which give a much deeper insight about the city through the residents of that city. It is more on the lines of Paul Theroux's observational kind of travels. And just like Theroux, Bryson's unabashed whining and comments may seem derogatory to some. Specially his strong views on Austria, which he does justify. 

I've read many travel books and this is probably the first one where I laughed on every other page. Sure, Iyer's 'Falling off the map' did have a some sardonic humour, but nothing like Bryson's uproarious correlations. So that thing I've been hearing about Bryson being funny - that's 100% true. 

For instance, here's Bryson on the Germans' musical talents: "It should have been written into the armistice treaty at the end of the war that the Germans would be required to lay down their accordions along with their arms".

On the Scandinavian nations: "In a corner of Europe where the inhabitants have the most blunted concept of pleasure (in Norway, three people and a bottle of beer is a party; in Sweden the national sport is suicide), the Dane's relaxed attitude to life is not so much refreshing as astonishing."

On Norwegian television: "The best that can be said about Norwegian television is that it gives you the sensation of a coma without the worry and inconvenience."

On passing time while waiting for his train to arrive in Liechtenstein: "I allowed my eyelids to droop and passed the time by composing Swiss riddles.
Q. What is the best way to make a Swiss roll?
A. Take him to a mountaintop and give him a push.

Q. What do you call a great lover in Switzerland?
A. An immigrant

Q. What do you call a gathering of boring people in Switzerland?
A. Zurich"

On the rash drivers around Paris: "I mean to say, here you have a city with the world’s most pathologically aggressive drivers -- who in other circumstances would be given injections of valium from syringes the size of basketball jumps and confined to their beds with leather straps -- and you give them an open space where they can all go in any of thirteen directions at once. Is that asking for trouble or what?"

And many many more such witty gems sprinkled throughout the book. 

It is definitely a book I will be revisiting time and again.

NEITHER HERE NOR THERE TRAVELS IN EUROPE.

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