‘For fuck’s sake,’ he cursed, his voice low and dark and deep right next to my ear. ‘Don’t you dare move or make a sound.’

I couldn’t help it – I laughed, burying my face against his chest so it wasn’t audible. Whoever was in the kitchen was making an awful lot of noise, opening the cupboards and closing them, but it didn’t look like they were about to come our way.

‘I swear to you if someone comes out and takes you away, I’m going to lose it.’

I gave her hand a gentle squeeze, closed my eyes and took a deep breath. ‘You’re not trying hard enough.’

I started following the last kid in the bunch and gently pulled Charlie with me. At least no one had tried to question us on why we were holding hands, because if they did I might have lost it on them.

‘Trying hard enough for what?’

‘To be alone with me.’

William started scooping up his peas and putting them on my plate while he was talking to Nico. I waited for him to finish, then started gathering my carrot salad and putting it on his. Once I was done and looked up, almost everyone was staring at us.

You’re not an option. You’re the choice.

I did play pretend because I knew she enjoyed it before, but I was dead serious when I opened my mouth. ‘Because you are you. You’re so rare. So beautiful. Kind. Self-aware. Hard-working. Fun. Sweet. And because I know what you want from a relationship. I know you now. And I think you deserve to have the kind of relationship you’ve always dreamed of having.’

Despite my objections he followed me up to my door and I watched as he squatted in front of Pepp and petted him. I thought I heard him whisper take care of her for me to Pepp, but I couldn’t be sure.

Not even ten seconds had passed when I pushed my chair back just as Charlie had done and put my napkin down.

‘I think I’m done for the night too.’ Even though I knew I had all their eyes on me, I fixed my focus on Douglas. ‘I’d like to thank you for inviting me into your home, but I’m sad to say that would be a lie. Just like Charlie, I’d like to be anywhere but here, so I’m going to leave and catch up with your daughter and properly thank her for the dinner she cooked, since none of you thought to do that.’

Douglas stood up. ‘No need,’ I said, not giving him time to speak because if he said the wrong thing, I wasn’t sure how I’d react and I didn’t want to deck my new boss – at least not just yet. ‘I’ll see myself out. I think after what I’ve seen tonight we should only interact professionally.’

I turned to Charlie’s grandma and inclined my head. ‘I’d say it was nice meeting you ma’m, but I’m having trouble forming the words. Have a good evening.’

I ignored both Kimberly and her husband.

I want to love someone as if my heart will never break.