Adam Silvera

The NYT Besteller and 2017 Zoella & Friends Book Club Selection by Juno Dawson You’re still alive in alternate universes, Theo, but I live in the real world where this morning you’re having an open casket funeral. I know you’re out there, listening. And you should know I’m really pissed because you swore you would never die and yet here we are. It hurts even more because this isn’t the first promise you’ve broken. Griffin has lost his first love in a drowning accident. Theo was his best friend, his ex-boyfriend and the one he believed he would end up with. Now, reeling from grief and worsening OCD, Griffin turns to an unexpected person for help. Theo's new boyfriend. But as their relationship becomes increasingly complicated, dangerous truths begin to surface. Griffin must make a choice: confront the past, or miss out on the future... Praise for History is All You Left Me 'History Is All You Left Me overflows with tenderness and heartache. Even when its hero is screwing up royally, maybe especially then, Silvera's humanity and compassion carve out a space where it's not the falling that's important, it's how you pick yourself back up. There isn't a teenager alive who won't find their heart described perfectly on these pages.' Patrick Ness 'Adam Silvera is a master at capturing the infinite small heartbreaks of love and loss and grief. History Is All You Left Me is a beautiful meditation on what it means to survive devastating loss. This book will make you cry, think, and then cry some more.' Nicola Yoon 'Sweetly devastating, passionately honest, breathtakingly human' Becky Albertalli, author of Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda

A Zoella Book Club 2017 novel

History Is All You Left Me

Was mir von dir bleibt

Linus Rogge

Neugier allein gibt keinem das Recht auf eine Antwort

Und bitte sei ehrlich. Ich stelle keine Fragen, auf die ich die Antwort nicht vertragen kann. 

margo farto

I still have all the time in the world- if the world only had 12 minutes to offer, at least.

Secrets are revealed as OCD-afflicted Griffin grieves for his first love, Theo, who died in a drowning accident.

Romi

kelsey

*update 8/7/21 

what’s with me rating random books 5 stars

arwen

baku

“History Is All You Left Me” is a massive heart-breaker of a book. It is a deeply sad book and explores love, friendship, and grief in a heart-wrenching way. The characters in the novel feel extremely genuine and expertly fleshed out; no bad guys here – just four teenage boys with hearts. 

I really enjoyed Silvera’s writing (not a hater, I always have), but in this book, I actually might just hate him for it. He writes one of the most heartbreaking, beautiful prose I have ever read in YA. I had no idea how much I could relate to this on a personal level. Also, I really enjoyed the representation. Although heartbreaking, this isn’t your typical LGBT representation that revolves around homophobia and horror stories.

Really a breathtaking novel about love and loss and friendship that hits too close to home.

Isabella 

I absolutely loved the writing of this book. I felt so connected with the book. It was beautiful and captivating. The book got me thinking about not only what Griffin was going through, but also to the other characters. The characters were imperfect which I appreciated because even with them doing some unbelievable or insensitive things, it does happen in real life, and I think that's why I liked it. It showed realness in them. There were times when I felt like crying, it was painful to continue reading because of how raw it was. I couldn't fathom losing someone I love, so I liked how the story unfolds, from the pain, the grief they felt to being hopeful. I definitely liked this better than They Both Die at The End.

Ryan 

2.5 stars (changed from 3.5 stars on january 1st because now that i'm thinking about it, this book irritates me a bit more than i thought)

to the last 100 pages that i just read today, WTF???

marj

I am so sorry, but the writing in this book just isn't it for me...The writing seems corny and while its sad it never really captured grief the way its experienced? The writing was too blunt, to me grief is always somewhere and you're never sure where its just always there? I don't know how to explain, I'm happy others were able to enjoy this book but it was not for me.

rose.

"I pull myself out of this re-imagining because I can't change our history. I can't begin remembering you wrong."

*THIS REVIEW MIGHT CONTAIN SPOILER IN THE END*

When i first started this book, I was thinking of reading another book like 'Aristotle and Dante'. But far as I read the book, it has nothing to do with A&D, which is amazing since A&D is beyond compare. While A&D is talking about living life the fullest, History Is All You Left Me is talking about the experience of loss and the conflict of moving on. It talks about the grief of a guy named griffin who just lost Theo, the love of his life he thought he couldn't live without. In this book, we can see Griffin's endeavor to keep Theo's memory alive after his death, starting from hanging out with Theo's new boyfriend until going back to where Theo died and slowly figuring out how he died.

The author himself has an interesting writing style that made the book enjoyable. He pictured the struggle and the sorrow perfectly which made the characters seem alive. He also writes in an amazing point of view that tearjacks the reader in a touch.

"But that's okay. History remains with the people who will appreciate it most. I love you, but I can't stay longer"

"But this universe is the only one that matters, and I have one last question for you: I didn't get our history wrong, did I?"

Even the author wrote the ending miraculously and close it well. 

However, because there are constant flashbacks, sometimes the story is hard to get. Though there are dates, if we don't pay attention or memorize the time where the main story happened, it will be hard to see which timeline it is currently on, which is somehow frustrating because you should go back and re-read the date. 

This is one of the greatest book I have ever read so far, and I don't regret buying and reading this. 
Rating: 4/5

Daymaris Arca

Ok so was i annoyed at Theo and Griffin? Yes. Did pretty much everything happen in the last 100 pages? Yes. Ok now that I finished I can say that I was right to be annoyed bc no one was in a healthy, stable mindset but I had to check myself bc humans aren’t suppose to be perfect and emotionally stable all the time. It was good to see the character development in Griff and how he personally learned to heal and stop being an asshole to people that wanted to care. So yes you can say I liked it…

Poncho Bosque

Book was an emotional rollercoaster. Following Griffin's grief was wild, there were moments that I empathized with him so much, but others when I didn't feel for him and felt for the supporting cast. Wade, Griffin's parents and even Jackson are super relateable. They are sometimes easier to sympathize with than with Griffin.

Originally reviewed Sep 06, 2018 | Imported from my Goodreads account

Alberto

Megan O’Connod

** spoiler alert **
           Review to come on my new blog which I will link! This book was fabulous in every way

Review was originally published on my blog over at blueeyeddemon.weebly.com

Oh Adam Silvera, what have you done to me?
​I have been waiting for this book since I preordered it on the 9th of September 2016 when I watched a video from Emmmabooks on YouTube taking about preorders. I ordered a signed copy which I cannot express my happiness about and I have only just gotten the time to read it this week. I feel as though this signed copy is the closest I will get to meeting him. It feels strange, I waited for this for six months and now I am devastated it is over.
​First, let me go through my non-spoiler thoughts. The plot intrigued me immensely. It involves a boy, Griffin and he has gone through a very hard breakup when his ex-boyfriend moves to California for college and he is stuck in New York. But Griffin has a plan, he believes that him and Theo will find eachother again when the time is right although Theo has a new boyfriend and they are starting to drift apart. When Theo suddenly dies in a drowning accident, Griffin feels his whole future has disappeared. When Griffin and Jackson meet, they make an unlikely friendship, bonding through the loss of the boy they both loved. This book made me laugh, made my cry and I often had to put this book down and take a break. It touched me deeply, much more than any book has. I 100% recommend, it is a book everyone should read.
Now for my spoiler thoughts! This book is told in two timelines. One where we see Griffin and Theo come out to eachother and admit their feelings for eachother and one where Theo has just died and is coming up to the funeral scene. In the history  ​timeline, it is mainly light and happy with lots of funny scenes that you can't help but laugh out loud! In the present timeline, you can feel the grief that all of out main characters are feeling, especially Griffin and Jackson. Their grief is so raw and real and you just wanted to hold them and comfort them.
“Every universe I’ve created lately, your face keeps popping up in it.”
​We learn quickly that Griffin has OCD and suffers from many compulsions. Adam Silvera portrayed this brilliantly.  It felt authentic and real, and I applaud him for this. YA books are really lacking in these areas and this gives me a lot of hope for the future of YA books.
All of the characters in this book were extremely lovable but also extremely flawed in their actions. Griffin, in his depressed and grieving state. Jackson, who at the beginning was indirectly hurting and threatening our loved main character, Griffin. Wade, in his underappreciated, third best friend position, tagging along to the couple of Griffin and Theo. And finally, Theo, his dorky, hard working self. I don't agree with a lot of the actions that some of these characters did. Especially Griffin and Theo. Griffin, although in an unstable state, used both Wade and Jackson for his own benefits and to make himself feel better and Wade is such a good friend and supportive person to Griffin. He also used Jackson when he found out that Theo had shared his special kisses with Jackson in hopes of getting revenge on and hurting Theo.
The friendship and bonding that Griffin and Jackson shared surprised everyone, including themselves but it was one of the strongest parts of the book. These two characters feel as though eachother are the only people who understand what the other is going through and they need to lean on eachother.
“I look up, and Jackson's eyes find mine. For a second, it almost feels like we're about to race into the hole to join you. Being buried alive has got to be better than whatever comes next.” 
​I had multiple theories for the ending of this book, and it took many twists and turns that I was not expecting. I was very ​ satisfied with the ending but of course, I was sobbing. I sent Ross, a friend of mine who had already finished this book, a flattering picture of myself crying as I finished this. I was hoping for an ending that portrays that of real grief, and I got it. Griffin realised that he must let go and try to move on but he will also have a special place in his heart for Theo.
​This is a very mismatched review but I feel as though I am still not over this. I would recommend you all read this book if you haven't already! I have yet to read More Happy Than Not by Adam Silvera because it did not get a UK release but never fear, it is ordered and I am very excited for his new book to come out this year, They Both Die At The End which is set to release on September 5th! Is it possible to put an author as one of your favourite authors if you have only read one of their books?
​Don't forget to leave a comment, I am delighted to say this is my first post on this blog! I will be updating as often as possible. Don't forget to leave a comment, have an awesome day!

​Much love x

dija

I wanted to like this. Believe i did want to but it just ain't it.

Jamieson

history is all you left me literally fucked me up in 12 dimensions. this book moved me and effected me on such a deep level I really don't know what else to say about it. I read this book as part of a book club, and while I vaguely knew the plot, and had heard lots of good things about Adam Silvera - I didn't know what to expect exactly.

this book absolutely destroyed me I read it three months ago and I swear I think about it every day. It really touched me, and had such a big impact on me both at the time and now looking back. I called it a masterpiece then and I still do now. It truly is beautiful, thoughtful, gut-wrenching, I love it. 


  "I love you, but I can't stay longer. It may be a while before I speak to you again, I'm so happy you were my first, Theo, and you were worth all the heartache. I hope I wasn't living in some alternate universe where I wasn't actually your first love, too. But this universe is the only one that matters and I have one last question for you: I didn't get our history wrong, did I?"



in history is all you left me we follow 17 year old Griffin who's dealing with the death of his ex-boyfriend Theo Even though Theo and Griffin had broken up, and even though Theo was dating a new boy, Jackson, at college - Griffin still thought they were endgame. That eventually Theo and Jackson would be over, and Theo would come back to Griffin. But now Theo is dead, and Griffin has to start over. He starts a tentative relationship with Jackson, while exploring his complicated feelings and history with Theo. 

my favourite thing about this was Griffins character and narration. Griffin is obviously dealing with a lot - his grief, his OCD, his relationship with his family and friends, and his new relationship with Jackson. The way Adam Silvera is able to explore these issues and tie them together is masterful - he really is an artist when it comes to writing the human person - including and maybe especially the messy things. 
I also loved Griffin being in unreliable narrator. It allowed the story to slowly unfold, and exposed the flaws and downsides of characters and their actions in a way that was both surprising, logical and heart breaking. It feels as if you grow and learn hand-in-hand with Griffin. 

The story flips between chapters set in the present, and set in the past, and I enjoyed both timeframes equally. As the past and the present time frames got closer and closer, I got sadder and sadder, and I was definitely beyond upset when the climax hit. The character development was beyond good, it really blew me away and I adored everything about Griffins growth and realisations. 



  
  

  


History is All You Left Me is a book that destroyed me, but also which made me feel full. It was incredibly well written - I went through so many feelings and emotions - happiness, sadness, grief, anger, confusion, even a memorable update when I said I "wasn't sure if I should cry, vomit or both" (still true).

Adam Silvera is the MASTER at writing tender characters who need to figure themselves out - who might be broken or damaged or hurt but are slowly putting themselves back together if they can. Griffin is a character that has stayed with me for three months, and not all characters do. And I definitely think he will be with me for a lot longer. 

I adored this book so much, I just think it was so clever, so raw and so honest. I want to reread it eventually because it just meant so much to me and I just was so impacted by it. I enjoy many books, but not all of them make me feel on a deep - this is more then just a book way. But History is All You Left Me definitely did. I don't have enough words to really describe how much this book moved me, but it did and I love it. 



  "But I'm a human too, with my own human feelings. You used our intimiate history to create a future with someone else. You used our love against me. Now I'm using your love against you."


spotify playlist 


  History is nothing. It can be recycled or thrown away completely. It isn’t this sacred treasure chest I mistook it to be. We were something, but history isn’t enough to keep something alive forever.

lisa roeling 

*4,5
i know adam silvera is good in writing sad stories, but this one is definitely the saddest

Arild Vester Smetana

eliz

garbage. can't remember anything besides Starwars and Harry Potter references that made no sense

Rachel Evans

(4.25/5) Audiobook - 5 hours 27 minutes - My favourite book by Adam Silvera that I have read so far. I think the depiction of grief was well done, and I definitely emotionally connected to all the characters. The ending seemed to spring fairly significant events on the reader all at once, which I feel could have been alluded to better in order to make the story feel more cohesive, but I can understand if this was an artistic choice of the author. Grief isn't cohesive. A very good book.

Alice Myles

I love everything Adam Silvera comes up with and every time it's soul destroying, He so carefully creates his characters and you feel their emotions and heartache and damn does he know how to make you feel. As soon as I read the summary I knew that this was the book for me, it had everything I love in fiction and it didn't disappoint. It's raw and honest from the first age to the last page and even though you find out about the history and present simultaneously you're still constantly uncovering things you didn't expect. He also handles the topic of OCD very well, it's not romanticized and it's portrayed as very very real.

Sebastián

4 - 4.5 !! Really well written and most importantly painfully (in a really good way) to read.

that shit hurted....

but really this was such a wonderful & heartbreaking book :::))) 


  People need people. That’s that.

Turtle lover

i love how they pointed out the blaming part. no one is to blame. its good since if it were me, I would also be thinking of just finding fault. all the what ifs. this talks about lost chances and finding yourself to continue despite the tragedy that had happened.

Dee B. 

What's that Griff? All Theo left you was history? Well all Adam Silvera left me was HURT. So there, I win!

This book meant so much to me, more than I can ever put into words, because sometimes you have to sit by and watch people move on, and sometimes it's you that needs moving on. 

What follows this point is going to be my stream of conciousness thoughts as I read the book. 

(view spoiler)[Oh God, that condom situation had me cringing from second hand embarrassment. Loved it!!

Constantly tearing up. Oh, Adam you are a genius and a cruel man.

I feel for both these boys, both of them are hurting so wholly that I just want to hug them both and make them feel better.

The birthday video <3 and 3. Graduation(!) and Valedictorian certificate!!

That restaurant/birthday scene has me gagging from the awkwardness and palpable hurt.

Their breakup killeeeed meeeee

Griff has become SERIOUSLY dependant on Jackson...woooow but so cute

This trip to California is not a good idea!!!

Packing up that room uuuuuugh my heeart

OMG!!! That beach incident. To be so close to 'dying' in the same way that he did, in the same place that he did

Theo showed him the kisses omg wow and then the real kiss SHOOOOK. But, Griff, doing that to get back at a dead person is stupid

The change in him...and then the REVELATIONS!

Theo is awful for stringing both these boys along like this, but he's torn so understandable if unforgivable.

Wait! Wait! Wait! Wade is gay??? Oh poor Wade, loving Griff while he was too busy loving Theo

That final voicemail. Yiiiikes (hide spoiler)] And then I was too lost to take any more notes. You're welcome. Off to cement this book in my memory.

jess

This book was so achingly sad at times that it was difficult to get through, and that's a good thing. It deals with the history, death, and fallout of Griffin's ex-boyfriend, Theo, and how Griffin reacts to his current. It's an intersection of grief, heartbreak, mental illness, and guilt, and Adam Silvera writes it very well. 

Griffin goes through a lot during the course of this book, and he copes with it in ways that are sometimes frustrating and self-destructive. He's very real, though - he acts like a teenager who's struggling immensely. Griffin isn't by any means perfect. He's jealous and emotional and reckless, but it doesn't take away from his character. It's easy to emphasize with him, which is good, because the book is driven by Griffin's character development. From the moment Jackson - Theo's boyfriend before his death - steps onto the page, you feel bitter towards him, because Griffin is. And slowly, you warm to Jackson as the two boys get to know each other. 

The "history" sections with Theo and Wade are just as good as the ones in the present. You get to know Theo through these sections as well as the relationship Griffin and Wade have with him and how it's resonated after Theo's loss. This is another highlight of the book: the relationships between Griffin, Theo, Wade, and Jackson. They're complicated and messy, but that's how life is. 

I can't really do this book justice in a review, honestly. Just go read it; you won't regret it.

History Is All You Left Me A Zoella Book Club 2017 novel

Reviews

Highlights