Permanent Record

i’m giving it 3.5 stars because it was pretty good at the beginning and i really liked pablo! towards the end of the book, i felt like the whole plot was muddled and i didn’t really know what was going on. that’s why it took me almost a month to read it. i also wasn’t very satisfied with how the story ended either and it seemed almost abrupt to end it that way.

this review was originally posted on twirling pages objectively, this book is closer to a 3.5 or 4/5 star BUT because i had such a wonderful reading experience and enjoyed it so so so much, i have no qualms for giving it a 5/5. Permanent Record is the first book i stayed up to read in a really long time; i can’t remember the last time it happened. i just– T—T mary h.k. choi’s writing continues to blow me away. i’m obsessed and in love. it makes me want to write, or be a writer. i wish i were able to put my thoughts into words the way she does. this felt more like a collection of essays than a novel. it reminded me of durga chew-bose’s Too Much and Not the Mood (aka one of my all! time! favorites!) in the way it was unfiltered, casual (but not), and cultured. No finite moment is responsible for my success. There wasn't a fork in the road. Some monumental inflection point where my life changed. It was the accumulation of totally normal, regular-ass days where I worked hard, followed my better instincts, and did the right thing. much of the story is set in new york/brooklyn and i really felt myself transported back to the dingy streets. i could almost feel the rumble of passing trains and cluster of people you know but don’t know. it was wonderfully cinematic. for a while, i was “over” being obsessed with new york and okay with not moving there. but after reading this?? it felt weirdly personal. i want to roll my eyes at the train delays; i want to go to the bodega and hunt for specific food items. this isn’t a loud NEW YORK book, but it really felt like one. also it made me hungry for snacks. fair warning. a big thing i noticed was the pacing. it was a little very scattered – jumping from chapters of a singular night to sentences summarizing weeks. at first i was kind of bothered and confused, but i came to see it as a metaphor for our main character, pab’s, well-being. (and i have a lot of Thoughts about him) throughout the novel, he’s unsure of what he wants and seems out of focus. (how does one make the main character, told in first-person pov, unfocused????? truly a skill. how?!!!) but when things feel Big for him, you can see it reflected in the writing, pacing, and everything. when things become clearer for him, he loses his haze. Trying to get better at the thing you want to be the best at is humiliating. these characters and relationships are messy and complicated. i kind of hated some of them. but by the end, i loved them all!! (shocker) they were so human. at times they were very frustrating, but it was annoying because it’s things i would do and hate myself for doing. these characters were very much their own, but i could also see hints of them in myself and my friends. when relationships were messy or tense, i could see it’s because people are in certain places at certain times. it made me reevaluate my relationships. and kinda feel existential. it's great.  Spoiler can we take a moment to talk about pab??? i didn’t really get him at first. and in the middle he was SO INFURIATING. i hated how he kept avoiding his problems; i hated the way he was treating his friends and family; i hated how kept breaking his promise to lee and goes down an internet spiral. but i could understand why. in a way, pab felt like me when i block everything out and avoid my problems. i become infatuated by this Shiny New Thing (or for him, person) and i lose all sense of reason. i don’t know why i do this and i can’t stop. it’s the worst and he was the worst. BUT he grows so much. by the end, he’s not “the perfect person” but has a sense of what he wants and it’s so endearing. i become the weepy emoji. and lee. i really really liked her. i feel like i could do a big deep dive on her as a person, but it would make me just like pab or any of the smartees or dumbees. it's like when i follow someone on instagram but don't KNOW them. i read her words and see her as a person but i don't KNOW her. but isn't that the same for any human connection or relationship? is hers different just because she's famous and part brand and not full person? or is it because it's told in pab's perspective? my thoughts on her continue to evolve and grow. their relationship felt a little insta-lovey and weird, but i still loved them together? the ending reminded me SO MUCH of la la land and i loved it so much. when pab FINALLY chose himself over her, i felt like a proud mom. and even though they don't end up together, there's a chance they COULD at some point of the future. your love doesn't have to be everlasting for it to matter. roman holiday-esque. it could never work out but it's still a different sort of special. i also want to make some things clear: this is marketed as a YA book, but it didn’t really feel YA? the characters are ~20-22. college era and a little beyond. i guess you could say it’s NA, but it’s very not NA. it’s also marketed as a romance (see cover) and i don’t think the romance is the Big Thing. it is, but it isn’t. it’s a romance in the way la la land is a romance; it is, but it’s more about the characters themselves than the relationship they’re having and ~steamy romance~. which i like so much better. ... in art the purpose is the creation, not the result. Grow as you build. Autotelism. 'Auto' for self and 'telos' for goal. Find joy in the learning. i could go on, but i think it’s very clear how much i enjoyed this book. reading it made me eight-years-old again when i would bring the book with my everywhere and constantly think about the story throughout the day. even though there were “problems” with it from a reviewer’s standpoint, i still love it. i know the pacing is weird; the plot is essentially non-existent and confused; the romance is kiiinda insta-lovey but not. who cares?  it’s still great.  ABOUT THE AUTHOR Mary H.K. Choi is a writer for The New York Times, GQ, Wired, and The Atlantic. She has written comics for Marvel and DC, as well as a collection of essays called Oh, Never Mind. Her debut novel Emergency Contact was a New York Times bestseller. She is the host of Hey, Cool Job!, a podcast about jobs and Hey, Cool Life!, a podcast about mental health and creativity. Mary grew up in Hong Kong and Texas and now lives in New York. Follow her on Twitter @ChoitotheWorld. BLOG TOUR SCHEDULE August 26th – Vicky Who Reads August 27th – Adventures of a Book Junkie August 28th – Utopia State of Mind August 29th – Read by Tiffany August 30th – Rich in Color August 31st – Your Tita Kate September 2nd – Books on Pointe September 3rd – Andi’s ABCs September 4th – Book Scents September 5th – Twirling Pages (that's me!!) September 6th – Bookshelves & Paperbacks September 9th – YA Bibliophile September 10th – Mary Had A Little Book Blog September 11th – Chasing Faerytales September 12th – Nicole’s Novel Reads September 13th – Mel to the Any

RTC but my heart hurts so good.

Boring af.

** spoiler alert ** This book claimed to be about “love and social media and fame”. It effectively talks about none of these. The theme of debt? Handled ridiculously poorly. Writing-wise, it holds too much detail in places that are useless and lacks development of plot or characters or romance (even though this is supposed to be a romance). Characters can usually save a book with a shitty plot for me. These characters did nothing but make it worse. We gain little information about Lee, and Pablo’s character is too self-centered to be a reliable narrator. Lee is the typical “being famous is hard” girl. She lacks character flaws in any way and makes her unrealistic. Pablo lacks any connection to other characters, besides the forced relationship he had with Lee, and even that seems detached. Also, such a hypocrite. He complains constantly about how his life is a mess but rejects any help. Are we actually supposed to feel sorry for him? Are we supposed to want him and Lee to end up together? The only characters I cared about were Pablo’s parents and his bosses, the Kims, who I think were unintentionally saving the slim plot that was injected into the book. Pablo and Lee were all over the place, their romance was instant-love in the worst way. Learning about Pablo was painstaking, the way he antagonized everyone in his life who was actually trying to help him, made me like everyone else but him. The attempted insertion of racial politics?? WTF even was that? I understand the attempted “racially ambiguous” mixed kid representation, through Pab and Lee, but there is no actual discussion on how Pab deals with that or combats that besides the food thing. Overall, I wasted 400 pages of brain and eye power.

I was expecting this to be your typical rom-com, but it wasn't. I really didn't see the ending coming. The ending was poignant and actually I think it fit the Character development really well. Not many authors canoutline anxiety + the pains of growing up and adopting to the ever changing would quite like Mary Choi.It was quite nice to see characters that I could see in the people around me. Honestly, reading about anxiety in this way- whoa , hit the nail on the head

This is an amazing contemporary book that will help you get out of a reading slump. It isn't the typical ride off into the sunset with the love of his life type a book. It's about finding oneself in a world that seems to always beat you down. The humor and POC representation allows for a better perspective of life in New York, and the demands of parents. Following Pablo's story and his relationships with friends and family is very rewarding in the end. The art of humanity and its faults in the modern world is written well which makes you not want to put it down. It is an easier read that can be read in one sitting or two. If you like this book. "Emergency Contact" is another great read by Mary H. K. Choi.

This one hit a little different and nearly made me cry during my Corona-time walk.

Actual rating: 2.5 stars. I wanted to love this so badly. I honestly thought it would be my next radio silence. But, unfortunately, I had issues with the execution. I feel like we don’t get to learn much of anything about Lee and that a relationship was thrown in just because? This would’ve worked amazingly without lee in it tbh. It could’ve been a great, real coming of age and didn’t need a relationship involved. Especially one with a celeb. I loved Pablo. Sometimes he’d be repetitive but he was well fleshed out. Real. He struggles. He messes up. He’s had a rough time. This is all so true to the world we’re living in now Other random things: The tension between Pablo and his dad was a little intense at times and it was just random. The Seoul part broke my heart but was also a bit much in regard to pablo’s time alone. The ending was good but it felt haphazardly thrown in just to incorporate lee in one last time.

I had been wanting to read a Mary H.K. Choi book for awhile, and when my #Bookcaseclub box sent me this one in a gorgeous hardback, I straight up squeeled in delight. (I MAY have petted and hugged it, too) This book did not disappoint, and now I need more. She has this way of detailing a scene in a way that sinks you into it and has you marinating in it without making it feel over detailed. It's a delicate balance she manages to master. The characters are rich and full of depth, even the side characters you get connected to more than most books. I suck at remembering names in books, but I could tell you all about the side characters in this one. 💗

What kind of ending was this I hope there is a second book

It was good, but took me a while to get through. I both liked and loathed these characters and the entire thing made me anxious. But it was still intriguing and her writing is something I mesh well with. Full review to follow

3.5 I wish we would’ve gotten more about Pab’s problems in the whole book instead of just at the end. His solution to everything while accurate, didn’t have enough of a fight to actually justify it.

so ... just finished this. might add more later but here it goes... I was pretty disappointed with this book. I really enjoyed Emergency Contact so I was looking forward to another Mary H.K. Choi book but this one just isn't for me. i really don't want to just go off on a rant so I'm going to try to keep this short and objective. I really didn't like Pablo, I thought he was super selfish, complain-y and just INFURIATING. Leanne Smart was just... idk man. Self absorbed, annoying, and i just didn't like her either. I felt like both of them were so bland and literally their only personality trait was that they lIkEd SnAcKs. The only character I like was Tice lol, I thought he was cool and I would totally love a book dedicated to his story. Also Pablo was low-key really weird about Leanne??? like he legit said something about how when she goes she takes her smell with her and SIR???? i get it but please. please don't ever say that. the plot itself seems pretty far fetched, but I figured ok there could be a way to do this that isn't ridiculous. unfortunately, this book was kinda ridiculous. i don't want to give away too much of the story so i won't include any details but... i have a feeling no celebrity would do what Leanne did LOL. The first 350 pages? holy what in world. Honestly, I really did enjoy the parts where Pablo wasn't obsessing over Leanne or we had weird gen-z slang peppered everywhere. I'm 21 and even some of the things they said made me internally cringe. I read this on my iPad and I annotated a BUNCH because there were so many lines that had me just so angry or annoyed lmao. I was going to DNF but I read in someones review that Pablo gets called out in the last bit of the book and I needed to read that part. That was my fave part in the entire book lmao. The last 50 pages? not bad tbh. i actually enjoyed it and I loved how Pablo's friend calls him out on his shit. I also think Pablo has his wake up moment and starts acting like an adult which is nice. on another note, the narrator for this audiobook........ the voices he did........ i can't. anyways yeah i think I'm going to leave it here for now. I really don't like giving low ratings because I can only imagine the work that goes into writing and publishing a book and i just feel bad. but this is just my opinion!!!!!

“Sometimes I wonder what would happen if we told each other the things we never say” I feel as though sums up this novel. Heart breaking but captivating, this novel shows us a man named Pab whose working in a Deli after dropping out of Uni; before he unexpectedly becomes tangled up in the life of Lee, a singer and actress who wanted something real. This novel mixes these two worlds together beautifully, showing how Lee and Pab’s lives get entangled and how sometimes where is unsaid is louder than what we are saying.

“Wait, who are you, man?” -Ross This is a question that everyone has been asked at some point in their life. Not necessarily by someone specific, but at least by themselves. And at different points in life, that answer changes. Is Pablo a college dropout? Is he the boyfriend of a teen celebrity? Is he a social media sensation? Or is he a normal young man, trying to find his place in the world? Pablo has a situation that many young people find themselves in, massive student loans, credit card debt, and no strong sense of what they want to do with their lives. He dropped out of school, is working a minimum wage job, and has no strong ambitions on what to do as of yet. In walks Lee, who is very successful, and suddenly Pablo knows what he wants to do....he wants to be with her. As with every relationship, the curtains open, the magic wears off, and you discover the truth about each other....and whether or not you can handle that. And you find yourself in the meantime. I enjoyed reading Pablo’s journey as he starts taking his life seriously and learns to ask for help. And that ignoring his problems will not make them go away. Unfortunately, I did find the book to not be engaging and found it very easy to put down. It was well-written, just somewhat dull for me. I would have liked to see more backstory on why Pablo chose the college he did, why Lee became the person she is, and so on. I am curious as to if their relationship progressed as well.

Pablo Neruda Rind’s life isn’t easy. He quit college with a huge debt that he is not able to pay back. He avoids the calls from the bank, his parents and any responsibilities. He moves in with his friend's house and finds a job in the shop with healthy food products. On his birthday he waits for something to happen so the day won’t be the same as all other days. As hard as it is to believe he got what he wanted. At night the girl came to the store during his shift. At first, he didn’t recognize her but before she left, he saw something familiar in her. She was Leanna Smart; a popular singer and actress people were obsessed with. He didn’t show any signs of recognition as he didn’t want to ruin their conversation that went very well. After this day, she was the only thing he could think about. He saw her everywhere and wished to have her number so they could meet again. He didn’t believe to meet her again, but he wasn’t the only one who was charmed by this night. One day Leanna came back to the shop and this is the moment when their story starts. Their worlds are different from each other as the day from the night. They both have problems in their lives they want to run away from. They are each other’s escape. As much as they try, they cannot leave their lives behind for a long time. They need to face reality. My thoughts: Well, this book gave me mixed emotions. It started as a perfect love story but didn’t finish this way. As weird as it sounds, it’s the part I liked the most. I feel like their relationship was like an escape from their lives. They went so deep into it that they didn’t want to go back to reality but when they finally got to the moment when it wasn’t possible anymore. They had to face reality and make changes in their lives. It makes us think about thinks we are running from. Sometimes it’s better to face them and work on the future instead of running from the past. Pablo is an interesting character. His personality changes so often and quickly that you cannot keep up with him. Once he is super optimistic and feels like he can do everything but in a second, he becomes this pessimistic and depressed part of himself, who isn’t possible to reach anything in his life. I think that his adventure with Lee woke him up. He finally started to do something with his life instead of thinking low about himself or reaching too high. He stopped waiting until someone will help him to change his life and he did it himself. Lee, however, had to let him go because she was the one who kept standing on his way. The story didn’t end as I thought it will, but I think it’s good it wasn’t too predictable. The love story started as fast as it ended. I feel like everything was going so fast that I couldn’t keep up with them. I think it was also a point of it to show how fast the emotions were growing between them. They didn’t spend much time with each other, but he felt deeply for each other and when it ended it was heartbreaking for them both (and for me). It wasn’t a long story, but it is perfect for all young adults who struggle with similar problems with becoming an adult and facing the reality of being responsible for all decisions. It shows that even if we are lost there is always a way to change it.

Score: 2.5 / 5 To say I didn't feel anything after reading this book is a total lie. Choi's writing is beautifully serene as it is sad, reflecting the greyer aspects of life. It's a book I think teens would not like because it deviates from the "accomplishing your dreams and finding love" plot point that is universal in most if not all YA contemporary fiction. However as much as I first resonated with Pablo in the beginning, more than halfway through he was still stalling and more than once by his own choice. It felt as if he was being purposefully lazy, and as much as I empathize with his anxiety (I have it too) it is no excuse to treat the people around you like dirt. Leanna on the other hand as I expected was a narcissist, I wished we had a POV because I didn't feel her presence. I felt nothing for the romance either and at times it was painful to watch really. Finally that ending. I felt it was too rushed and sudden, to me I would have loved to have seen an open ending that hinted at a recovery rather than this big happily ever after. Do I recommend? If you're looking for butterflies than this is not the romance book for you. Blog | Twitter | Pinterest | Tiktok

I absolutely adored this story. This has so many beautiful moments. 💜

Pablo has been struggling with finances, with finding a passion, with discovering what he wants to devote his life to. At the moment, he’s working the graveyard shift at a 24-hour bodega. He’s avoiding telling his parents how over his head he is from student loans and the credit card he opened when he first started college. Basically, his life is a mess. Then one night, famous pop star Leanna Smart wanders into the bodega and everything changes. There’s an instant connection, but Leanna is crazy busy all the time, zipping from one continent to another making albums and movies and business deals while Pablo spends his time working and avoiding taking responsibility for all his problems. Is there any way they can make their relationship work, or were they doomed from the start? I’ve never read a book about encountering a celebrity. I’m sure there are plenty of books of that nature out there, but Mary H. K. Choi’s novel is the first encounter I have had with a narrative that revolves around a celebrity and a civilian dating. Because of this, I was really interested in the logistics of how jarring it is to have someone sweep into your life with a whirlwind entourage including a manager, body guards, publicist, and whoever else trailing paparazzi. And then having to treat all that as if it’s normal and seem unfazed by the complete disruption caused by just being around this person. Pablo is a likeable guy, and I truly enjoyed this novel, but I never felt emotionally connected to Pablo or Leanna. If anything, I felt more for Pablo’s family and the married couple who run the bodega Pablo works at. Some of Pablo’s roommates even seemed more interesting. Essentially, all the secondary characters had more life and vibrancy to them than the main characters did. What kept me reading this novel was my curiosity as to whether Pablo and Leanna actually work things out. Continue reading: https://freeairforfish.com/2021/08/25...

I thought this book was really great. It’s a story of trying to figure out yourself in life along with seeing everyone else around you succeed. I related to Pablo a lot due to me currently trying to figure out what to do in a world where it seems like everyone has their foot in the door. The way that Pablo tries to keep everyone happy constantly and still keeping himself a float was hard to read, but in the end he finds exactly what he needs to do and goes with it.

Wow, reading this book felt like such a blur to me. Everything happened so quickly and spontaneously that you don't even have the time to properly wrap your head around things. The plot is a little over the place, which reflects the MC's life in lots of ways, but was hard for me to decipher if there was even any plot to start with. That being said, this novel definitely has more of a slice of life story and is more character driven. I did have quite a few problems with the book, namely with the main character and his love interest. I had trouble relating to the love interest and the MC can get so aggravating at times . Maybe the problem with the love interest is that we don't get to see things from her POV at all, which is totally fine, but that made it look like she was just a plot device, which is a little sad because hearing her side of things could have been so much more interesting. She has so much depth as a character, but we did not get to explore any of that at all, which is a shame. Nonetheless, the emotions that were portrayed by Pab were so realistic and relatable it hurts :'( The story and narrative feels so painfully real - I can understand the struggles that Pablo go through because the way the author puts his thoughts into words just really hits. The tone of his voice does not sound curated, and the book reads a lot like a personal diary/journal (not exactly in writing, but in authenticity), which really makes you connect with Pablo. I love that this book reminds us that crazy good things, bad things, and weird things happen in our lives in totally unexpected ways, and that we either have to live with it, fight it, be grateful for it or learn from it. The arc of the story packs a punch, and the family dynamic hits so hard, I felt the need to ring up my parents upon finishing the book. I have so much love for the slice of life elements in this novel. I cannot wait to read more of Mary H. K. Choi's work! Thank you so much Hachette Australia for sending over a free copy in exchange for an honest review!

In this story, we have a romance between a college dropout (narrator) and a pop star/actress who is famous but commonly clowned, particularly by her age group. Now, while I appreciated the elaborate justification of emotion and specifically illustrated thought processes, I could not help but feel as if there was something missing, especially towards the end of the book. I thoroughly enjoyed the writing style and gathered a decent to good amount of highlighted quotes. Solid 3.5/5. Definitely worth the read, but nothing ultra captivating or all-consuming.

I love myself a good slice of life contemporary and this did not disappoint. I loved that, not only was this a college age YA, but a college age YA where the MC doesn't have their shit together. It was so great to read about someone in their twenties who still has a lot of self discovery and growing up to do. Don't get me wrong, I love reading about characters pursuing their passions but it was so refreshing to follow a story of someone who hasn't found their's yet, whilst surrounded by people who have and trying to navigate that. I loved that the characters were imperfect, messy humans trying to figure things out, kinda failing at it but learning from those failures. This book was heartwarming, funny, painfully relatable at times and just... so great. (It's also been a long time since a book made me so hungry.)