Name: Kay so Queso's review of The Gardener and the Carpenter by Alison Gopnik
Item: The Gardener and the Carpenter
Rating: 4.5
Author: Kay so Queso

Alison Gopnik

One of the world's leading child psychologists shatters the myth of "good parenting" Caring deeply about our children is part of what makes us human. Yet the thing we call "parenting" is a surprisingly new invention. In the past thirty years, the concept of parenting and the multibillion dollar industry surrounding it have transformed child care into obsessive, controlling, and goal-oriented labor intended to create a particular kind of child and therefore a particular kind of adult. In The Gardener and the Carpenter, the pioneering developmental psychologist and philosopher Alison Gopnik argues that the familiar twenty-first-century picture of parents and children is profoundly wrong--it's not just based on bad science, it's bad for kids and parents, too. Drawing on the study of human evolution and her own cutting-edge scientific research into how children learn, Gopnik shows that although caring for children is profoundly important, it is not a matter of shaping them to turn out a particular way. Children are designed to be messy and unpredictable, playful and imaginative, and to be very different both from their parents and from each other. The variability and flexibility of childhood lets them innovate, create, and survive in an unpredictable world. “Parenting" won't make children learn—but caring parents let children learn by creating a secure, loving environment.

What the New Science of Child Development Tells Us About the Relationship Between Parents and Children

The Gardener and the Carpenter

Easier said than done, but I fw this sentiment

Kay so Queso

Just as we should give children the resources and space to play, and do so without insisting that play will have immediate payofts, we should do the same for scientists and artists and all the others who explore human possibilities.

On the Web we communicate with the planet, but rely on a psychology designed for the village.

When schools are under pressure to produce high test scores, they become motivated, consciously or unconsciously, to encourage ADHD diagnoses—either because the drugs allow low-performing children to score better or because ADHD diagnoses can be used to exclude children from testing.

I really enjoy Professor Gopnik’s perspective

Play is realy fun for grown-ups, too. It's a little compensation for the not-so-fun work of gathering enough resources for children to thrive.

The key to love in practice is doing things together-whether it's working, child-rearing, lovemaking, taking a walk, or baking a cake-participating in the world in a way that accommodates the strengths and weaknesses of both of you.

Rockstar reference for a book about parenting, love this.

Our lives wouldn't be fully human without both phases — Eden and the Fall, innocence and experience.

Love the use and insight of the “verb”-ing

We recognize the diference between work and other relationships, other kinds of love. To be a wife is not to engage in "wifing", to be a friend is not to "friend", even on Facebook, and we don't "child" our mothers and fathers. Yet these relationships are central to who we are.

I really enjoyed this book. I am personally a really big fan of Alison Gopnik’s writing style and I thought there was a lot of interesting information and perspective in this. From her discussions of evolutionary themes of parenting to philosophical arguments that underly loving our children, her range of discussion around child rearing and the diverse references she makes lead this book to be enlightening and interesting to almost anyone.

Developmental psychology is a personal interest of mine, so of course I enjoyed it very much, but I think most people would get something out of reading this book and almost all parents would certainly benefit from it. I loved its view on raising children, I learned a lot from it and it was enjoyable to read. 

I really enjoyed this book. I am personally a really big fan of Alison Gopnik’s writing style and I thought there was a lot of interesting information and perspective in this. From her discussions of evolutionary themes of parenting to philosophical arguments that underly loving our children, her range of discussion around child rearing and the diverse references she makes lead this book to be enlightening and interesting to almost anyone.

Developmental psychology is a personal interest of mine, so of course I enjoyed it very much, but I think most people would get something out of reading this book and almost all parents would certainly benefit from it. I loved its view on raising children, I learned a lot from it and it was enjoyable to read. 

Julien Sobczak

Selected as a Book of the Year by the Financial Times ‘The Gardener and the Carpenter should be required reading for anyone who is, or is thinking of becoming a parent’ Financial Times Caring deeply about our children is part of what makes us human. Yet the thing we call ‘parenting’ is a surprisingly new invention. In the past thirty years, the concept of parenting and the huge industry surrounding it have transformed childcare into obsessive, controlling, and goal-orientated labour intended to create a particular kind of child, and therefore a particular kind of adult. Drawing on the study of human evolution and her own cutting-edge scientific research into how children learn, Gopnik shows that although caring for children is profoundly important, it is not a matter of shaping them to turn out a particular way. Children are designed to be messy and unpredictable, playful and imaginative, and to be very different both from their parents and from each other. The variability and flexibility of childhood lets them innovate, create, and survive in an unpredictable world. ‘Parenting’ won't make children learn – but caring parents let children learn by creating a secure, loving environment. In The Gardener and the Carpenter, the pioneering developmental psychologist and philosopher Alison Gopnik argues that the familiar twenty-first-century picture of parenting is profoundly wrong – it's not just based on bad science, it's bad for children and their parents too.

MK &
The Gardener and the Carpenter by Alison Gopnik

Reviews

Highlights

Join the club

MK &The Gardener and the Carpenter by Alison Gopnik

Reviews

Highlights

Join the club

MK &
The Gardener and the Carpenter by Alison Gopnik