Lemony Snicket

Has Lemony Snicket been poisoned? A standalone novel for all ages -- a contemporary fable in the great tradition of The Little Prince and Sophie's World -- by one of the twenty-first century's most beloved authors. For more than twenty years, Lemony Snicket has been one of the most famous narrators in contemporary middle-grade fiction, leading millions of readers through a mysterious literary world of bewildering questions and unfortunate events. Now, with this latest book -- a love letter to readers and reading, and a meditation on the vagaries of real life -- longtime fans and new readers alike have an opportunity to experience Snicket's distinctive voice in a new way. This true story -- as true as Lemony Snicket himself -- begins with a puzzling note under his door: You had poison for breakfast. Following a winding trail of clues to solve the mystery of his own demise, Snicket takes us on a thought-provoking tour of his predilections: the proper way to prepare an egg, a perplexing idea called tzimtzum, the sublime pleasure of swimming in open water, and much else. Poison for Breakfast is a classic-in-the-making that -- in the great tradition of modern fables like The Little Prince and The Phantom Tollbooth -- will delight readers of all ages.

Poison for Breakfast

Brett Helquist

There is nothing to be found in the pages of A Series of Unfortunate Events but misery and despair. You still have time to choose another international best-seller to read. But if you must know what unpleasantries befall the charming and clever Baudelaire children read on . . . In The Reptile Room the siblings endure a car accident, a terrible smell, a deadly serpent, a long knife, a brass reading lamp, and the re-appearance of a person they’d hoped never to see again. With 5 million copies sold in the UK alone, one might consider Lemony Snicket’s A Series of Unfortunate Events to make him one of the most successful children’s authors of the past decade. We, however, consider these miserable so-called adventure stories and the Hollywood film starring Jim Carrey that accompanied the books for children as nothing more than a dreadful mistake.

The Reptile Room

Top secret—only for readers deeply interested in the Baudelaire case. How I pity these readers. With all due respect, Lemony Snicket

A Series of Unfortunate Events: The Beatrice Letters

The Baudelaire orphans disguise themselves as employees of the Hotel Denoument and find themselves pursued by the evil Count Olaf and others.

The Penultimate Peril

Violet, Klaus, and Sunny Baudelaire are intelligent children. They are charming, and resourceful, and have pleasant facial features. Unfortunately, they are exceptionally unlucky. In the first two books alone, the three youngsters encounter a greedy and repulsive villain, itchy clothing, a disastrous fire, a plot to steal their fortune, a lumpy bed, a deadly serpent, a large brass reading lamp, a long knife, and a terrible odour. In the tradition of great storytellers, from Dickens to Dahl, comes an exquisitely dark comedy that is both literary and irreverent, hilarious and deftly crafted. Never before has a tale of three likeable and unfortunate children been quite so enchanting, or quite so uproariously unhappy. Ages 10+

A Series of Unfortunate Events #1: The Bad Beginning

A Warning from the Publisher: Many readers have questions about Lemony Snicket, author of the distressing serial concerning the trials of the charming but unlucky Baudelaire orphans, published under the collective title A Series of Unfortunate Events. Before purchasing, borrowing, or stealing this book, you should be aware that it contains the answers to some of those questions, such as the following: 1. Who is Lemony? 2. Is there a secret organization I should know about? 3. Why does Lemony Snicket spend his time researching and writing distressing books concerning the Baudelaire orphans? 4. Why do all of Lemony Snicket's books contain a sad dedication to a woman named Beatrice? 5. If there's nothing out there, what was that noise? Our advice to you is that you find a book that answers less upsetting questions than this one. Perhaps your librarian, bookseller, or parole officer can recommend a book that answers the question, "Aren't ponies adorable?"

The Unauthorized Autobiography

A Series of Unfortunate Events: Lemony Snicket

The Baudelaires need a safe place to stay - somewhere far away from terrible villains and local police. A quiet refuge where misfortune never visits. Might Heimlich Hospital be just the place? In Lemony Snicket′s eighth ghastly instalment in A Series of Unfortunate Events, I′m sorry to say that the Baudelaire Orphans will spend time in a hospital where they risk encountering a misleading newspaper headline, unnecessary surgery, an intercom system, anesthesia, heart-shaped balloons, and some very startling news about a fire. Ages 10+

A Series of Unfortunate Events #8: The Hostile Hospital

Young apprentice Lemony Snicket asks all the wrong questions while trying to solve a new case involving a missing girl.

"When Did You See Her Last?"

Collects an array of disheartening truths and unhappy observations drawn from the author's work, including "siblings who claim to get along all the time are most definitely hiding something."

Bitter Truths You Can't Avoid

Horseradish

Some boxes should never be opened. For the first time, the complete A Series of Unfortunate Events – including the highly feared #13: The End – is available in one awful package! We can't keep you from succumbing to this international bestselling phenomenon, but we can hide all thirteen books in a huge, elaborately illustrated, shrink–wrapped box, perfect for filling an empty shelf or deep hole. From The Bad Beginning to The End, this box set, adorned with Brett Helquist art from front to back, is the only choice for people who simply cannot get enough of a bad thing! Ages 10+

A Series of Unfortunate Events Box: The Complete Wreck

Accidents, evil plots, and general misfortune abound when, in their continuing search for a home, the Beaudelaire orphans are sent to live and work in a sinister lumber mill. "Wicked good fun."--"Kirkus Reviews."

A Series of Unfortunate Events #4: The Miserable Mill

Before the Baudelaires became orphans, before he encountered A Series of Unfortunate Events, even before the invention of Netflix, Lemony Snicket was a boy discovering the mysteries of the world. Train travel! Murder! Librarians! A Series Finale! On all other nights, the train departs from Stain'd Station and travels to the city without stopping. But not tonight. You might ask, why is this night different from all other nights? But that's the wrong question. Instead ask, where is this all heading? And what happens at the end of the line? The final book in Lemony Snicket's bestselling series, All the Wrong Questions. span

"Why Is This Night Different from All Other Nights?"

Is Lemony Snicket a detective or a smoke detector? Do you smell smoke? Young apprentice Lemony Snicket is investigating a case of arson but soon finds himself enveloped in the ever-increasing mystery that haunts the town of Stain'd-by-the-Sea. Who is setting the fires? What secrets are hidden in the Department of Education? Why are so many schoolchildren in danger? Is it all the work of the notorious villain Hangfire? How could you even ask that? What kind of education have you had? Maybe you should be in school?

"Shouldn't You Be in School?"

The fifth book in the "A Series of Unfortunate Events" series tells the wretched adventures of the charming Baudelaire orphans at boarding school where they face strict punishments, dripping fungus, comprehensive exams, a girl named Carmelita Spats, smelly sneakers, and the metric system.

The Austere Academy

Before the Baudelaires became orphans, before he encountered A Series of Unfortunate Events, even before the invention of Netflix, Lemony Snicket was a boy discovering the mysteries of the world. Match wits with Lemony Snicket to solve thirteen mini-mysteries. Paintings have been falling off of walls, a loud and loyal dog has gone missing, a specter has been seen walking the pier at midnight -- strange things are happening all over the town of Stain'd-By-The-Sea. Called upon to investigate thirteen suspicious incidents, young Lemony Snicket collects clues, questions witnesses, and cracks every case. Join the investigation and tackle the mysteries alongside Snicket, then turn to the back of the book to see the solution revealed. A delicious read that welcomes readers into Lemony Snicket's world of deep mystery, mysterious depth, deductive reasoning, and reasonable deductions.

File Under: 13 Suspicious Incidents

There is nothing to be found in the pages of A Series of Unfortunate Events but misery and despair. You still have time to choose another international best-seller to read. But if you must know what unpleasantries befall the charming and clever Baudelaire children read on . . . The End is the last in A Series of Unfortunate Events, and even if you braved the previous twelve volumes, you probably can’t stand such unpleasantries as a fearsome storm, a suspicious beverage, a herd of wild sheep, an enormous bird cage, and a truly haunting secret about the Baudelaire parents. With 5 million copies sold in the UK alone, one might consider Lemony Snicket’s A Series of Unfortunate Events to make him one of the most successful children’s authors of the past decade. We, however, consider these miserable so-called adventure stories and the Hollywood film starring Jim Carrey that accompanied the books for children as nothing more than a dreadful mistake.

The End

Dear Reader,You have undoubtedly picked up this book by mistake, so please put it down. Nobody in their right mind would read this particular book about the lives of Violet, Klaus, and Sunny Baudelaire on purpose, because each dismal moment of their stay in the village of V.F.D. has been faithfully and dreadfully recorded in these pages.I can think of no single reason why anyone would want to open a book containing such unpleasant matters as migrating crows, an angry mob, a newspaper headline, the arrest of innocent people, the Deluxe Cell, and some very strange hats.It is my solemn and sacred occupation to research each detail of the Baudelaire children′s lives and write them all down, but you may prefer to do some other solemn and sacred thing, such as reading another book instead.With all due respect,Lemony Snicket Ages 10+

A Series of Unfortunate Events #7: The Vile Village

After being created, a latke jumps out of the frying pan, runs down the street screaming, and explains to those that it meets why it is an important part of the Hanukkah tradition.

A Christmas Story

The Latke Who Couldn't Stop Screaming

There's dreadful news from the symphony hall—the composer is dead! If you have ever heard an orchestra play, then you know that musicians are most certainly guilty of something. Where exactly were the violins on the night in question? Did anyone see the harp? Is the trumpet protesting a bit too boisterously? In this perplexing murder mystery, everyone seems to have a motive, everyone has an alibi, and nearly everyone is a musical instrument. But the composer is still dead. Perhaps you can solve the crime yourself. Join the Inspector as he interrogates all the unusual suspects. Then listen to the accompanying audio recording featuring Lemony Snicket and the music of Nathaniel Stookey performed by the San Francisco Symphony. Hear for yourself exactly what took place on that fateful, well-orchestrated evening.

The Composer Is Dead

Carlos Sussekind

Mau começo é o primeiro volume de uma série em que Lemony Snicket conta as desventuras dos irmãos Baudelaire. VIolet, Klaus e Sunny são encantadores e inteligentes, mas ocupam o primeiro lugar na classificação das pessoas mais infelizes do mundo. DE fato, a infelicidade segue os seus passos desde a primeira página, quando eles estão na praia e recebem uma trágica notícia. ESses ímãs que atraem desgraças terão de enfrentar, por exemplo, roupas que pinicam o corpo, um gosmento vilão dominado pela cobiça, um incêndio calamitoso e mingau frio no café da manhã. É Por isso que, logo na quarta capa, Snicket avisa ao leitor: "Não há nada que o impeça de fechar o livro imediatamente e sair para uma outra leitura sobre coisas felizes, se é isso que você prefere". Em 2005, Jim Carrey estrelou uma versão cinematográfica dos três primeiros livros da série, no papel de conde Olaf.

Lemony Snicket

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