Quiet
Remarkable
Educational
Inspirational

Quiet The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking

Susan Cain2013

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Reviews

Photo of Julian Paul
Julian Paul@julianpaul
4 stars
Dec 14, 2024

Good insights overall.

+3
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Kat Albanese@coachkitty
5 stars
Oct 12, 2024

wonderfully, academically, painfully resonant and enlightening.

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anjali@anjalislibrary
4 stars
Jul 8, 2024

Offers an interesting viewpoint from the "other" side of the Introverts v/s Extroverts camp. Cain, herself a true-blue introvert, puts forth a number of arguments on the nature of being introverted and what it entails for us as individuals, parents, collegues, and contributors to the world. By taking stock of various scientific studies, she also points out why underestimating introverts can be overwhelmingly off the mark. An interesting read with some fresh viewpoints and scientific studies, it offers a breather in a world of loud, aggressive, obnoxious self-help "Be More Extroverted!" sort of books.

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Pratik M@pcmhatre
4 stars
Jun 26, 2024

'Quiet' attempts to dispel the notion that you've to be an outgoing & gregarious person that's the life of a party to be successful in life. As Cain backs up with several examples that many successful people have been avowed introverts, she leads you down the path of providing research-backed conclusions that dissuades you from trying to be whom you're not. Being an introvert is not the same as being anti-social. For the former, social interactions for a prolonged time can be mentally and emotionally exhausting and just as an extrovert thrives on more interactions, an introvert has an upper limit on the time he/she can spend with people before retiring into their own homes for peace and quiet. The ideas on productivity including teamwork, brainstorming, and open-office collaboration are simply myths that research has proven to not yield results unless the collaboration is done online (creating Wikipedia, etc.) The best work is often done on your own before sharing it with others. I've often done my best work on my own even to the extent of doing my design dissertation in my architecture undergrad years when my peers took help of several of our juniors. Cain offers plenty of strategies to introverts who may want to 'act' as extroverts in a world where gregariousness is considered a must-have asset. Introverted people in professions that need you to be extroverts often tend to over-prepare which even makes them more reliable and better at their work instead of an extrovert who may decide to 'wing' it. That said, Cain doesn't consider being introvert a necessary attribute for success in life but she emphasizes that it need not be a debilitating one.

Photo of Liyah 🤎
Liyah 🤎@aallen1019
5 stars
Jun 17, 2024

Really helped me understand my introverted traits better as well as how to help people relate to me. Extremely well written.

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elizabeth@ekmclaren
3.5 stars
May 11, 2024

Once Cain dropped the odd defiance and started to rely more on studies than anecdotes, I was into it.

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Amna A.@crayoladagger
4 stars
Apr 5, 2024

Introverts. I wasn't familiar with this term before reading this book, but if I had, I would have been identified as one. I have always been a shy kid, preferred to spend time alone or with one other friend at the most, I rarely talked in school and stuttered whenever I was in the spotlight. And for this I have had my parents, teachers and others constantly criticizing me because of those traits. Years passed by while I was trying to improve my social skills and mingle with more people, and I actually did tackle some some points and improved. Little did I know that there was nothing wrong with being an introvert. That I could actually was able to state my opinion and make a difference without saying much. Anyways, it was thanks to this book that I now see introversion as a necessary half of this society.

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maitha mana@maithalikesapplepies
4 stars
Apr 3, 2024

Introverts, some see them as weak and defenseless (as they seem to be aloof than the crowd). But I see introverts as a great example that a person doesn't have to have a voice in order to be heard, and doesn't need to be loud to shake the world. It is true, we prefer loneliness most of the time, since we get fueled up with no need of outer influence, but it is also true that we don't allow ourselves to be beaten up. To me, the ones who got beaten down are the ones who stand firmer than ever. In summary, introverts see the good and the bad, the honest and the liar, the triumphant and the tyrant, basically- people as their true selves. We listen to all, but trust a few. We give as much as we can, but accept little. Introverts are proof that true power comes from within.

Photo of Anton
Anton@tonyv
5 stars
Feb 12, 2024

Just reading the book already heals some wounds for me. The book presents the thought research on the topic of introversion, both biological and cultural. In short, it says: it’s okay to be an introvert. Furthermore, as the title implies, it shows that some powers that introverts commonly have are the fruits of the same tree, and to be truly happy you need to harness these powers.

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Brian@briany
5 stars
Jan 25, 2024

instruction manual for introverts. Learned a ton about myself!

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ghezaal noori@ghezaal
5 stars
Jan 15, 2024

before i read this book i never truly identified as an introvert, solely because i thought that as a negative thing, and that people would pity me or “feel bad”. but as i read, i continued to find myself always relating with every word written. i despise small talk, even more when its just a small quirky remark with no known answer, its even worse when i have to force myself to do it. i love to engage in meaning and intellectual conversations that have actual meaning, so far i have so little of that and it drives me insane, i thought i was just “not normal” and that small talk is a necessity for everyone to survive, while this is true in many ways i cannot fathom the idea of it still. but more than anything i love to be alone. alone with my thoughts, my books, my movies and shows. i love going to places alone doing things you would normally do with big group, alone. while i feel that many people don’t agree that the idea of being alone can be comforting, it is undoubtedly true, and such an enlightening thing to discover about yourself and better yourself. being an introvert has given me a solid base and something that I can always rely on; myself. this book allowed me to harness this power and even learn how other introverts may think and act. i highly recommended this book to anyone who wants to dive deeper into introvertion in order to understand themselves or their friends and loved ones better. whether you're an introvert, extrovert, or ambivert, this book is sure to help you gain more insight and understanding into the complex world of human personalities.

Photo of hileahrious
hileahrious@hileahrious
5 stars
Jan 12, 2024

As an introvert, this book really jives with me. However, its greatness lies in the parallel and complex contexts of introverts and extroverts, highlighting the strengths and weaknesses of both, and the importance of remembering that nothing is set in stone (at least to a certain genetic point we can easily change who we are). The most interesting part to me was the discussion of Kagan’s studies of high-reactive children and being able to tell from very young how people might turn out. The advice for parents and teachers is also extremely interesting and useful. The most important message and reason why everyone should read this book, no matter how they think they may identify, is KNOW THYSELF.

Photo of Benedict Neo
Benedict Neo@benedict
5 stars
Dec 31, 2023

Growing up as a quiet and shy person, I had a hard time being sociable in high school, due to my tendency to repel from overstimulation. I always thought that I was different and kept telling myself to talk more and be more normal. This book helped me to accept who I am and be proud of being an introvert.

Photo of Ty
Ty@sunkissedfool
1 star
Oct 18, 2023

i feel like this was twice as long as it needed to be. actually it could have been 0 pages

Photo of Benedict Neo
Benedict Neo@bneo
5 stars
Sep 7, 2023

Growing up as a quiet and shy person, I had a hard time being sociable in high school, due to my tendency to repel from overstimulation. I always thought that I was different and kept telling myself to talk more and be more normal. This book helped me to accept who I am and be proud of being an introvert.

Photo of Ryan Haber
Ryan Haber@ryanofmaryland
4 stars
Jul 31, 2023

Good for helping an extrovert like me "get" introverts and, for that matter, that part of each of us that needs quiet aloneness. The author tries hard not to indict extroversion as a lesser sort of existence but tips her hand with numerous word choices and examples. After a while, the cumulative effect makes the book a bit wearing.

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rumbledethumps@rumbledethumps
3 stars
Jun 26, 2023

Let me start by saying that I probably fall toward the introverted side of the spectrum, and am at most an ambivert. What Cain has to say is important, and I am glad I read this book. However, something to keep in mind while reading it: she is making a lawyer's argument, not a scientist's. She rarely, if ever, presents arguments that undermine her position. She gives her interpretation of a clinical study, then follows it up with words like "suggests" and "speculates." In other words, she presents a study, then interprets and extends it for the reader in a way that bolsters only her case. It is not an impartial examination of the issue. She is trying to persuade us. What makes this noteworthy is that she frequently makes value judgments on introversion vs extroversion. She often presents introversion as a virtue, and extroversion, at best, as something we all just need to put up with. This book can help people realize that introversion is not a personality flaw, and that's an important point to make. But when she extends her argument to imply that introversion is *better* than extroversion, she loses me. Overall, I'd recommend this book as an important book of our time, and for parents, teachers, and managers who'd like to better understand the introverts in their lives. But, it is an opinion piece, not a science book.

Photo of Ayesha ahmed
Ayesha ahmed@ayeshaa
5 stars
Jun 20, 2023

This book is a great read for both introverts and extroverts. The way that everything is presented is very straighforward - loved it!

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Colleen@mirificmoxie
5 stars
Apr 15, 2023

Throughout college, I had to take the Myers-Briggs Personality Test several times. After one such time, the professor compiled our results and said that the class spread was in line with the normal distribution for this test. She then proceeded to talk about how those of us who were classified as "Introverts" had not yet matured or evolved into "Extroverts" - that all mankind was moving towards the ideal personality type of ESTJ. Never mind that almost all scientific discoveries, technological advancements, and artistic masterpieces were done by introverts. Society still constantly pushes us to become extroverts. This is what Susan Cain calls the "Extrovert Ideal." Quiet explores this phenomenon in depth. The book is marvelously researched. It has a wonderful balance of psychological studies, historical examples, interviews, and personal antidotes. It was never too lofty or dry. I was hooked from the first page when Cain tells the story of Rosa Parks, a quiet introvert who sparked one of the biggest civil rights disputes in this country's history. I probably would have plowed through this book a lot quicker if I wasn't so intrigued with each new case study or example. Every page or so made me think of some personal experience or some study that I'd read. Or I would stop to look up a book or study that was referenced. It did at times feel a little like a self-help book for introverts. (Introvert have power! Go Introverts!) The earlier chapters in particular made a point of reaffirming the power of introverts. But it was still a fascinating read. My only other critique is that I wish the book was framed to appeal more to extroverts. Although the last two or three chapters do address extroverts as well, the majority of the book is clearly directed towards introverts. I am so glad I read this, and I will most likely reread it in the future!

Photo of Lynn
Lynn@lynncornelissen
4 stars
Mar 15, 2023

4.5 stars. What a fantastic, informative, and applicable read. I identify as an extrovert and picked up this book to better understand my relationships and further dissect them over this axis. This was the perfect guide for that. Cain does a superb job at balancing theory, advice, and actionable insights. Tackling everything from romantic relationships to friendships and parenthood - there is a little for everyone. There was a small part in the middle that dragged a little, so no full 5 stars for me. But this book has incredibly important lessons which I will take with me for years to come. Incredibly relevant and highly sticky for the brain.

Photo of Cristian Garcia
Cristian Garcia@cristian
5 stars
Feb 5, 2023

Absolutely a must for everyone. A loving book, crafted with a lot of valuable and actionable insights. Useful, well written and overall, important.

Photo of Keven Wang
Keven Wang@kevenwang
5 stars
Feb 4, 2023

1st reread. Still got lots of nuggets from it.

Photo of Lynette Pedersen
Lynette Pedersen@bonbonvivant
3 stars
Feb 3, 2023

Finally finished this one, which the library will be pleased about since I renewed my loan umpteen-million times. I have mixed feelings about it. At first, I was reluctant to read it because of all the hype it got when it came out and because, as a massive introvert, I was doubtful that it would really tell me much about myself that I didn't already know. However, I gave in. At the beginning I was extremely enthusiastic about it and even recommended it to several people before I was even done. Much of the information is thoroughly liberating. The book made me realize that I'm not so weird and dysfunctional after all, and it also made me realize that I am not alone in the world. It made me feel much less guilty about the times I feel like withdrawing completely from my wonderful children and husband--it wasn't them, it really was me and it was a perfectly natural reaction to the pressures of the external world that I clearly don't cope well with in abundance. It has a few little coping strategies, but mostly it is largely just validation for those of us who feel like utter weirdos on a daily basis. On the flip side, I do have a couple criticisms. First, I feel like Cain's sense of audience is muddled. In some places she's talking to me, the introvert dealing with an extroverted American culture. In other places she's talking to those other extroverted Americans who have to deal with me. What's the likelihood of those extroverts picking up this book? Sure, maybe their introverted spouse or friend may put it in their hands, but I think it's a pretty small number who make the thoughtful decision to read about how the rest of the world functions, especially since Cain proves time and time again that the general, uninformed extroverted world thinks that we're just plain weird at best and wrong at worst. It makes me wonder if Cain's time might have been better spent focusing on a little more of the "pep talk" parts for the "wilting violets" of the world, which brings me to my second criticism: One of the final chapters discusses individual cases of an extroverted parent raising an introverted child. I am not denying that this is valuable to those in that kind of situation, but, well, see my previous argument about the number of extroverts who might actually get through the book to that point without being directed to do so by, say, a psychologist who has figured out that the introversion in an extroverted house is the issue. However, where is the help for the introverted parents raising extroverted children? It is just as confusing and painful for an introverted parent who just wants to get through the store to what she needs and then out swiftly and with as little interaction with others as possible to have a bright, outgoing child who wants to talk to everyone they pass and, worse yet, is so ridiculously adorable that people just want to continue to engage the hilarious and utterly tweet-able conversation with this small human. How does the introverted parent balance that utter misery and frustration with the overflowing pride that their kid is so awesome? I think that's a valid question and concern, and considering that Cain's primary (though obviously not only) audience is the introverted individual why on earth was this not explored? It is unfortunate that this is where I was left with the book since it was the last chapter before the conclusion. Don't let my nit-picking get to you though, especially if you aren't a parent and can mostly just skip over that second-to-last chapter anyway. I think that there is a lot to learn and whole lot to think about with this book.

Photo of Savindi Jinasena
Savindi Jinasena@streetlightreader
4 stars
Jan 23, 2023

I really enjoyed this book. It was a relief to read about introverts in a world which favours extroverts. Susan Cain has put a lot of thought and research into this book and it was interesting to read about the studies that have been conducted to focus on introverts. What's important to remember is that this book does not pit extroverts and introverts against each other, but rather it focuses on understanding what it means to be introvert. I wish I knew what being introverted meant growing up and as a University student because I feel like I would have been understood better and may have understood myself better at that time. But it's never too late I guess! I would definitely recommend this book to both introverts and extroverts :).

Highlights

Photo of Julie Wagner
Julie Wagner@jrwagner17

[Professor Adam] Grant says it makes sense that introverts are good at leading initiative-takers. Because of their inclination to listen to others and lack of interest in dominating social situations, introverts are more likely to hear and implement suggestions. Having benefited from the talents of their followers, they are then likely to motivate them to be even more proactive. Introverted leaders create a vicious circle of proactivity, in other words.

Photo of Julie Wagner
Julie Wagner@jrwagner17

The lesson, says Collins, is clear. We don't need giant personalities to transtorm companies. We need leaders who build not their own egos but the institutions they run.

As someone who is in the business field, I think this is an important note. I find the best managers are people who listen and reflect. The ones who seem to know our strengths and where we need to grow. The worst have been the assertive ones who think they know it all.

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Amy Buckle@amysbookshelf

Here's one answer: social media has made new forms of leadenship possible for scores of people who don't fit the Harvard Business School mold.

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