Raphael Bob-Waksberg

Written with all the scathing dark humor that is a hallmark of BoJack Horseman, Raphael Bob-Waksberg's stories will make you laugh, weep, and shiver in uncomfortably delicious recognition. In "A Most Blessed and Auspicious Occasion," a young couple engaged to be married is forced to deal with interfering relatives dictating the appropriate number of ritual goat sacrifices for their wedding. "Missed Connection-m4w" is the tragicomic tale of a pair of lonely commuters eternally failing to make that longed-for contact. And in "More of the You That You Already Are," a struggling employee at a theme park of dead presidents finds that love can't be genetically modified. Equally at home with the surreal and the painfully relatable (and both at once), Bob-Waksberg delivers a killer combination of humor, romance, whimsy, cultural commentary, and crushing emotional vulnerability.

Stories

Someone Who Will Love You in All Your Damaged Glory

Sasha Maiboroda

And I think about how loving someone is kind of like being president, in that it doesn't change you, not really. But it brings out more of the you that you already are.

Look into his eyes and tell me you don’t see what I see. 

I look into his eyes and I see love. I see hate and anger. I see revolution and honor and dishonor all at once.  

And I go, Okay, yeah, he seems like a cool guy. 

She thought about how sad it was that one day Debbie would fall in love with someone who would at first appreciate all that was special about her, but eventually learn how to take her for granted. 

And when the Sadness catches up, tracks you down — when you return home one day, arms full of groceries, to find the Sadness sit- ting at the kitchen table, casually reading a paper as ifit never let eating a muffin as if this were all perfectly natural — when the Sad- ness looks up at you and says, "What did you think, buddy? What did you think was going to happen?"when the Sadness smirks at you and says with a wry insistence that unravels you in the instant. “This is the real love story here, buddy, you and me” — when the Sadness reiterates that, sure, certain smaller sadnesses dull. but this Sadness, the Sadness, has seen you through it all; this Sad- neSs, the Sadness, has never strayed from your side, not really, and why would you want it to now, this epitome of stability in an inconsistent world? when that happens, you can put your groceries down, and walk back out the door and close the door behind you. 

And I thought about how, actually, if you wanted to, you could say the same thing about life. That life is terrifying and overwhelming and it can happen at any moment. And when you're confronted with life you can either be cowardly or you can be brave, but either way you're going to live. So you might as well be brave.

sam kruczek

Lucinda looked back at the box, then back at Debbie. She thought about how pure Debbie was, how young and unsullied. She thought about how sad it was that one day Debbie would fall in love with someone who would at first appreciate all that was special about her, but eventually learn how to take her for granted. She thought about how this person didn't deserve Debbie, this person who didn't know how rare it was to be loved by a person so tender.

Gavin just always heard accusations in everything, which would've been a good thing for him to discuss with his therapist, if he didn't also consider it an accusation of some sort every time Lucinda suggested he see a therapist.

She had trouble focusing on the movie, though, because she kept thinking about how good it was that she couldn't look at her phone during the movie, and how by the time the movie was over she would probably have a few new text messages to look at, from Gavin or anybody else who wanted to text her, but then when she turned her phone back on after the movie, she had gotten no new text messages.

you look around at your fellow audience members in this half- empty theater and you wonder if the only reason any play is ever successful at all is just on account of friends and family "being supportive."

Move across the country and hope the Sadness won't find you, won't follow you like a stray dog from coast to coast. Hope the Sadness isn’t just a fog on a leash, shadowing you always. Hope the Sadness can't be as fleer as you are, hope the Sadness is more rooted. Per haps the Sadness has friends, a family, and can't just pick up and go. Look at all this stuff the Sadness has here in San Jose or Chapel Hill or wherever you're currently leaving. How's the Sadness going to survive without all this stuff? Hope this isn't one of those any-place- hang-my-hat-is-home-type situations where the Sadness hangs its hat on you. Hope that you are not the Sadness's home, anywhere you go, no matter how far, no matter how quickly- the Sadness lives in you. Hope to God it's not that.

 Sitting in the bath, listening to "California," you thought about your temporary cells and you thought about how one day you would change; you would wake up one morning and all of a sudden everything would be different and all the things that used to make you cry would make you roll your eyes and all the things that used to make you roll your eyes would make you cry. But, of course, that would all be many many years from now. 

. And it kills me that this is all the normal, typical people-in-love stuff, because I want to believe our love is special - that it's bigger and more interesting than any love that anyone else has had before-but the heartbreaking truth is my love for you is so consistent and predictable and boring."

We do know how she spend her last moments; the autopsy confirmed it: she flew straight up into the night sky, as far as she could go, as far away from everything as she could get, and then when the air got too thin to breathe she passed out and gravity dragged her tumbling back down to Earth. 

The way your mother rolls her eyes at you, your sudden decision to stop eating red meat, the immediate unexplainable sadness you felt when you saw your father's shirt draped over the back of a chair. You can write it all down, you can put it in your book of facts, but the truth is no one can ever really understand the tangle of experiences and passions that makes you who you are. It's a secret collection, a private language, a pebble in your pocket that you play with when you're anxious, hard as geometry, smooth as soap.

But here I was, sitting in my childhood bedroom with a guitar. The Up-and-Comers were over and done with and it was just Lizzy and me and it was the afternoon and it was summer in Tulsa and Lizzy was lying on my bed, looking as calm and beautiful as I had ever seen her, and she was asking me to play her something I had written.

And I thought about how, actually, if you wanted to, you could say the same thing about life. That 

is terrifying and overwhelming and it can happen at any moment. And when you're confronted with life you can either be cowardly or you can be brave, but either way you're going to live.

Caitlin

For some reason I had this idea that I was really special and that I was put here to do something really great and important, but the longer I kept living the more it just seemed like nope, I'm just kind of a normal person just like everybody else.

And you thought about how even though this scenario was made up, there was something so truthful about it because FACT: The things that are the most important aren't shared; they are important only to us.

I’ll be sitting on a train. I’ll be lying awake in bed. I'll be watching a movie; I’ll be laughing. And then, all of a sudden, I'l be struck by the paralyzing truth: It's not what we do that makes us who we are. It's what we don't do that defines us. 

“If the two of us are ever going to move forward, at some point, you're going to have to stop looking backward."

"I don't think you really love me; I think you're just terrified of being alone," and you, gesticulating wildly with the spatula, spat back without thinking, "I am alone; you have no idea how alone I am," as if that were some kind of comeback. 

𝓬𝓱𝓮𝓻𝓲𝓮

He had this really amazing party trick where sometimes he could go a full hour without even once being suddenly reminded of the paralyzing truth that his life was finite and unrepeatable.

Maybe you are right to be cautious. You have been lied to before, after all. Your heart is weathered and scarred, mishandled by many, eroded by time. You're no dummy, and yet repeatedly, you stumble over the cracks of your cobblestone heart, you let your naked foolish hopes get the better of you. Perhaps every can of cashews has a fake snake lurking, but you keep opening them, stupidly, because in your heart of hearts you still believe in cashews. And every time you discover the cruel fiction of the cashew can, you swear to yourself you'll trust a little less next time, you'll be a little less open, a little more hard. It's not worth it, you say. It just isn't worth it. You're smarter than all that. From now on, you're going to be smarter. Well, I'm here to tell you that this time will be different, even though I have absolutely no evidence to support that claim. Open this can and everything will be okay. The salted circus cashews are waiting. They are so savory and delicious. You will be so glad you put your faith in me. This time is different; I promise you it's different. Why would I lie to you? Why would I want to hurt you? This time there is no snake waiting. This time things are going to be wonderful.

Elizabeth Denny

3. "You're not like other girls," he said to every girl.

I denk oprecht echt dat ik te dom ben voor short stories. 

Julie Rubens

bella

Nabila Azahra

i appreciative the writer's ability to craft such unique & captivating way of delivering stories. even the first story was a strong kick-off in my opinion, however, not every stories had their charm factor. some of the stories laid a bit flat, some others had enough power to impress me.

JoAnna

Raphael Bob-Waksberg is incredible at plotting creative structures in his stories. But I found this short story collection a bit uneven, and some of the humor felt repetitive.

Some stories are really good and some are meh.

Pimvi

Kendall McClain

Natalie

A collection of short stories rife with the dark humour, sarcasm and existentialism that make Bojack Horseman so well-loved. I found the author's humour translated best in the punchy 2-3 page pieces, while the longer stories were on well-trodden territory. (Read: stories that you'd find in your average American fiction about upper middle class life). Overall, an entertaining read

★★★☆ // favourites were: “the serial monogamist’s guide to important new york city landmarks,” “rules for taboo,” and “up-and-comers.”

Iman Kamil

Loved some of the stories (nearly cried for TWO of the stories), but there were some others that I skimmed through because they were kind of boring / fake deep. Overall a pretty pleasant read though!

From the creator of the beloved and universally acclaimed television series BoJack Horseman, a fabulously off-beat collection of short stories about love--the best and worst thing in the universe. Written with all the scathing dark humor that is a hallmark of BoJack Horseman, Raphael Bob-Waksberg's stories will make you laugh, weep, and shiver in uncomfortably delicious recognition. In "A Most Blessed and Auspicious Occasion," a young couple engaged to be married is forced to deal with interfering relatives dictating the appropriate number of ritual goat sacrifices for their wedding. "Missed Connection--m4w" is the tragicomic tale of a pair of lonely commuters eternally failing to make that longed-for contact. And in "More of the You That You Already Are," a struggling employee at a theme park of dead presidents finds that love can't be genetically modified. Equally at home with the surreal and the painfully relatable (and both at once), Bob-Waksberg delivers a killer combination of humor, romance, whimsy, cultural commentary, and crushing emotional vulnerability.

lexie

this is one of my favorite books. weird, straightforward, sad and also unique. it’s one of those books that makes you wander about people in general. i don’t think i was surprised that this is weird because he wrote bojack horseman and i loved that show.

If you know me you know how much i rave about bojack horseman ( i believe it's a magnificent piece of media that should be watched by all). Anyways, discovering that the creator of my favourite tv show has a book out; i knew that i had to read it. Someone who will love you in all your damaged glory, is a collection of stories that relate to love in any kind of form and anything associated to it. I never know how to properly rate books that are a collection of stories so i'm just gonna list each story and what it was about! 

3.5/5 (some bias did influence my opinion)

1. A Most Blessed and Auspicious Occasion
   
   This was a wedding planning  story, and the chaos that comes with it. In this place traditions are for a lack of a better word, odd. it was eerily reminiscent of GoT/Midsommar. I loved the whole thing but more specifically “because I want to believe our love is special—that it’s bigger and more interesting than any love that anyone else has had before—but the heartbreaking truth is my love for you is so consistent and predictable and boring.”. This part made my heart clench in just how this type of love is so raw and tender, that it should just be felt by all.

2. Missed Connection—m4w

   A story of two people meeting on a train, that's it. and meeting isn't a proper word to use, they are just there, in the train. So to be honest this just SCREAMED you (the tv show) and it was creepy, at the start then it got less creepy...i think, haven't really figured out how i feel about it. My favourite thing that came from this story is “And I realised most likely I would never see you again. And I thought about how amazing it is that you can know somebody for sixty years and yet still not really know that person at all.”

3.  The Serial Monogamist's Guide to Important New York City Landmarks.

A girl dating in New York city, and how each place, every nook and cranny has left a mark on her. One of my favourite stories. It just felt relatable, like how you see anything or anywhere as a person that you once had/have a relation with.
“And you’ll smile at this man and wonder if he too, like all those who came before him, will someday be a bittersweet memory, will someday be felled by the same foolish blunder of knowing you a little too well and yet also somehow not enough.”

4. We Men of Science
A parallel universe, kinda. Let me explain, so Yoni, is a professor that teaches philosophy of science but he worked on this project with his mentor. The project is called the Anti-door in which the no-you exists living the non-you life? so just imagine everything that you are, flip it and that's whats hiding behind that door. This story was funny, confusing, beautiful, and sad (I'm basically describing bojack, pls watch it lol). I loved this story and i ABSOLUTELY enjoyed the drawings in it. “ll be struck by the paralyzing truth: It’s not what we do that makes us who we are. It’s what we don’t do that defines us.” This sums up the whole story, SUCH A GOOD STORY!!


5. LIES WE TOLD EACH OTHER (a partial list)
nothing worth of note, two people in a relationship and the lies they tell.

6. These Are Facts.
I don't know how to describe the relationship, saying brother-sister relationship feels wrongs, lovers feels double the wrong so i will stick with two-people-that-are-related-who-have-interactions. Honestly this just could've been a book in itself, too many emotions, too many wrongs, very few rights.

7. Lunch with the Person Who Dumped You
 You get an email from your ex asking you to have lunch, and your mind runs scenarios. 

8. rufus.
This is my favourite story, because it's about a dog's relationship with its owner. The audiobook made this chapter so enjoyable with the way he said words. Just a good old dog-owner banter! its from the dog's point of view so it was weirdly interesting. “he scratches my back and I love him. I love him with everything I am. I love him like he’s a part of myself.” This part made me sob so hard. i love this chapter.

9. Rules for Taboo
A twist on the rules of the board  game taboo, where they are basically airing out their dirty laundry while explaining the rules of the game.“And it occurred to me, right there in the this, that I had fallen for you completely. I was irreparably head over heels for this woman who, two months earlier, had slid up next to me, drunk, at a party and, as if she knew me, slurred into my ear, ‘You deserve someone who will love you in all your damaged glory.'”

ps. i normally hate when books include the book title in the book but this AHH also the reference to Pride and Prejudice <3333

10. up-and-comers
a book about a band turned to super-heros, very much giving fantasic 4 meets avengers. this just proves how Raphael is a good writer because this could've been a plot to a movie. The way he describes things is just so yes. “And I thought about how, actually, if you wanted to, you could say the same thing about life. That life is terrifying and overwhelming and it can happen at any moment. And when you’re confronted with life you can either be cowardly or you can be brave, but either way you’re going to live. So you might as well be brave.” THS IS SUCH A BAD-ASS LINE CMON

11. Move across the country.
Even if you move and just uproot your whole life, sadness will follow you there, not matter time or place. It's comforting in a strange way, no matter how much you change one thing is constant in your life.

12. You want to know what plays are like? 
“you begin to feel very, very naked and exposed. You feel like you’re a record store full of strangers; here they go, ambling up your aisles, riffling through your stacks. The Museum of You is now open for business, every piece of you hung up on a wall, laid bare on a table, harshly lit and awkwardly described. ”. The jury's still out for my emotions about this, but i know that i like it just not sure which feeling to place to it.

13. the poem
this whole chapter reads like a Dr. Seuss book, feelings are tangled and are a mess!
“A poem’s a thing that is hard to pin down, though the words pile up in your head. A person’s a thing that is tricky to read, but it’s trickier yet to feel read.”

14. The Average of All Possible Things.
A take on Lucinda's life post her breakup with Gavin, where she finds life..average.

15. More of You That You Already Are.
"Being a president of the United States is the easiest thing in the world basically." a great opening line! I think this has got to be my favourite story purely because its absurdity-turned-tragedy-ish plot.

16. We will be close on Friday 18 July.

for an ambiguous title this just hurt. “And when the morning comes, our love like bugs will scatter in the light. We will dress ourselves while facing the wall, we will scramble for our phones, we will be strangers.”.
Ending the book with these lines just made me break.

Overall, such an enjoyable read with skippable chapter imo.
and most importantly watch BOJACK HORSEMAN because the book has so much of that influence in it! and because its a good tv show!!

wildly creative and heart-wrenching romp. recommend to those who like to laugh and cry at the same time.

katie

indri

honestly everything i ever needed in a book

marta 

If you enjoyed watching bojack horseman, you will enjoy reading this book. Clever and extremely thought provoking. Made me think a lot. I looooved it.

Hannah 

Loved it with all my tiered bittersweet heart (Even acknowledgments! Have someone ever loved book’s acknowledgments? Is it legal?)

So so good. a book similar to everything i know about love but kurt vonnegut esque. love love and now i feel like i need to watch bojack horseman 

In my mind I read this in the voice of BoJack Horseman. Weird, witty, and fun collection of short stories. 

Vojtech

If I ranked the books I have read this year, this would be an easy top 2 (sorry, alone with you in the ether has my heart)

Cat Tang

Read this after reading my ex’s review. 

Favorites:
- The Average of All Possible Things - Cold capture of a breakup's details, wrapped in internal monologue
- short stories - I read this in a Barnes and Noble a year ago and the lines never really left my brain
- We Men of Science - Curious story on what we’re missing and what we want

Next tier:
- We will be close on Friday 18 July - Reminds me of the short passages you’d read for SAT prep. Pretty and sad.
- You Want to Know What Plays Are Like? - I liked this almost exclusively because some of my friends are theater majors
- Missed Connection - Made me smile
- A Most Blessed and Auspicious Occasion - Made me laugh

Read this after reading the reviews of: two friends who broke up and my boyfriend who joined the plot.

This collection is entertaining and upbeat. My favs and reasons:

- A Most Blessed and Auspicious Occasion: expectations and nosy questions that are relatable even at a scale smaller than marriage. you went on your first date? how was xyz? oh y wasn't sufficient? you'd better abc. this story made me laugh the most.

- Missed Connection—m4w: holy shit this is the emblem story of the collection.

- The Serial Monogamist's Guide to Important NYC Landmarks: nyc is my dream city so naturally this had to make it to my favs. completely applicable anywhere — seeing ghosts from classroom to bedroom and from tokyo to la. nostalgia at its most brutal

- We Men of Science: wonderfully nerdy but infinitely deep. makes me fear that unmet needs have to be suppressed because of circumstance

- Lunch with the Person Who Dumped You: unexamined truth

- Rufus: love any story with uncommon perspectives. anyone who loved Rufus should read Room.

- We will be close on Friday 18 July: ah, the could've beens

- Salted Circus Cashews, Swear to God: trust dwindles after hurt, sad story masked with exaggeration and humor

- short stories: oddly detailed cliches that are a package of truth when put together

- Lies We Told Each Other: some are out of care ("I love them (re: earrings)")?

- Rules for Taboo: interesting way of unfolding a plot

- Up-and-Comers: this story scared me in how much our minds can destroy ourselves

- Move Across the Country: spelled out my life — cycle of unfamiliarity, routine, happiness, change, sadness

- You Want to Know What Plays are Like?: not familiar with play culture

- the poem: author's style flexibility is insane

- The Average of All Possible Things: not really relatable

- More of the You that You Already Are: haha interesting park concept and scifi hypothetical (combining genes and 4D printing)

Xin Ma

Read this after reading the reviews of: two friends who broke up and my boyfriend who joined the plot.

This collection is entertaining and upbeat. My favs and reasons:

- A Most Blessed and Auspicious Occasion: expectations and nosy questions that are relatable even at a scale smaller than marriage. you went on your first date? how was xyz? oh y wasn't sufficient? you'd better abc. this story made me laugh the most.
- Missed Connection—m4w: holy shit this is the emblem story of the collection.
- The Serial Monogamist's Guide to Important NYC Landmarks: nyc is my dream city so naturally this had to make it to my favs. completely applicable anywhere — seeing ghosts from classroom to bedroom and from tokyo to la. nostalgia at its most brutal
- We Men of Science: wonderfully nerdy but infinitely deep. makes me fear that unmet needs have to be suppressed because of circumstance
- Lunch with the Person Who Dumped You: unexamined truth
- Rufus: love any story with uncommon perspectives. anyone who loved Rufus should read Room.
interesting wya of putting decorum
- We will be close on Friday 18 July: ah, the could've beens

Other comments:

- Salted Circus Cashews, Swear to God: trust dwindles after hurt, sad story masked with exaggeration and humor
- short stories: oddly detailed cliches that are a package of truth when put together
- Lies We Told Each Other: some are out of care ("I love them (re: earrings)")?
- These are Facts: chaos
- Rules for Taboo: interesting way of unfolding a plot
- Up-and-Comers: this story scared me in how much our minds can destroy ourselves
- Move Across the Country: spelled out my life — cycle of unfamiliarity, routine, happiness, change, sadness
- You Want to Know What Plays are Like?: not familiar with play culture
- the poem: author's style flexibility is insane
- The Average of All Possible Things: not really relatable
- More of the You that You Already Are: haha interesting park concept and scifi hypothetical (combining genes and 4D printing)




Faith Ho 

it takes a certain brain to create bojack horseman and this is almostly certainly that brain. it's an eclectic, funny collection of stories that belies deeper ideas of humans and relationships and love — though probably most relatable to a very specific demographic, my guess being twenty-something millennial americans. 

there's a good mix of short stories and experimental shorts, with a very distinct writing style and voice that runs through. he both takes the “mundane” and writes something out of it (a breakup, a relationship from the perspective of a dog) as well as writes the most exaggerated fantastical stories that ultimately mask the simple human complexities, fundamental relationship struggles (a superhero team, president town). most of the collection was me wondering - who thinks of that?? creative writing indeed, to say the least. 

my favourite stories:
- a most blessed and auspicious occasion: so so so funny. pokes fun at the ostentatiousness of weddings (but think sacrificing goats, and a shrieking choir) 
- missed connection - m4w: two people sit on a train and never meet but never get off. stretching the norm to the extreme and subverting that hyperbole
- the serial monogamist’s guide to important new york landmarks: written in second person, short continuations of protagonist's relationship with various guys. 
- we men of science: man goes into parallel, opposite world. 
- up-and-comers: superheroes but also they must be drunk to have powers 
moving across the country: Sadness follows. short but poignant.
- the average of all possible things: “a person as unexceptional as lucinda doesn't live a life as much as a life just floods in around her, filling up any empty space a life should be occupying.” “gavin continued to exist in the world, which lucinda thought was very rude.” (mood)

(also, the title is brilliant imo, and matches the contents very well)

Joana da Silva

This book was a ride with 3 turns along the way. At first, I thought "ok, this is nice", which then led to a "what the actual fuck, I thought this was a book about regular human relationships and love, what am I reading" and finally ended at "ok, I get it, that's the whole magic, Picasso, I like it". To be fair, I could've predicted that from the start given that this man gave us BoJack Horseman, right, there's no way he would just tell boring and mundane love stories. Although sometimes he does and does it in the most exquisite way!!! Great book, had so much fun and recommended it to so many friends.

sarah stevenson

this collection of short stories was unique, witty, and extremely entertaining. Waksberg tackles complex ideas such as existentialism, love, goat sacrifices, genetically modified presidents, etc. if you’re looking for a book filled with satire and stories to make you question your existence, this is the one for you.

Someone Who Will Love You in All Your Damaged Glory Stories

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